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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my DD has been ripped and pursue this further?

68 replies

CiritheLionessofCintra · 10/12/2015 13:56

My DD is 18, she works part time and ordered a dress for her best friend's birthday party on the 19th December. She ordered this dress on the 9th of November from a woman who runs an individual 'legit' business, apparently DD's friends order from her and such. The estimated delivery for DD's order was 2-3 days, it took 3 weeks and arrived on the 24th of November only for DD to open it and realise it wasn't the right dress. Hmm

So DD contacts the seller and informs her of this. She apologises and tells her the correct dress will be posted out as soon as she receives the wrong dress back so DD pays to post the dress back that day from our local post office and waits. She's told me all this today as there's still no word from the seller. I've agreed to take DD shopping for a back up dress but contacted the seller through DD's email. I inquired about her receiving the previous dress (DD was smart enough to track the dress she posted, the seller had indeed received the dress.). The seller replied that she hadn't received it so therefore she wouldn't be posting anything out.

I've went through all conversations DD had with this woman and through details that were given. There was no mistake, DD posted it to the address that seller gave and she defiantly received it. My DD works very hard for her money and the thought of her being ripped off like this really upsets me, though I could be hormonal and unreasonable.

AIBU?

OP posts:
hefzi · 10/12/2015 14:48

Call CAB, and ask them to open a report with Trading Standards (round here, at least, you can no longer contact them direct) and then send her a Letter Before Action, notifying her of your intention to take her to the small claims' court (you can use Google for templates) and after the appropriate amount of time has passed, file with moneyclaim online.

I don't want to depress you, though, but it does sound as though she's possibly having cash flow etc issues, and you may end up out of pocket permanently.

You could also report her to Action Fraud, which is for internet crime (which this technically is - taking money through your website for something you haven't delivered) www.actionfraud.police.uk/ and let her know you have done so (others may also have reported her) - and also let her know that you've raised the issue of her non-receipt of the parcel with Royal Mail, because "they take the possibility of fraud very seriously" and "it's clear that someone has fraudulently signed" etc etc These two actions (especially if she has a business account with RM, she won't like the thought of them scrutinising her) might also prompt her to part with the money.

Good Luck!

Maryz · 10/12/2015 14:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ShmooBooMoo · 10/12/2015 14:52

OOI, I may have missed it, but how much did the dress cost?
You should try to claim the return postage from the seller too as she failed to send in good time and also sent the wrong item. She should warn her friends not to order from her again too.

karalime · 10/12/2015 14:52

Don't bother with small claims, there is no need and it will cost you money.

As long as your daughter has proof that she returned it, it was delivered and it was in its original condition (to be fair you would not believe the number of people that send back worn, soiled, old stuff or send £100s worth of stuff without tracking!) just ring the bank.

I have dealt with far more frivolous charge backs and in your daughters case it would be far less hassle for the lady just to send the bloody right dress.

ShmooBooMoo · 10/12/2015 14:53

I echo Maryz, don't take another dress from her. She's proven herself as a dodgy seller.

hefzi · 10/12/2015 14:56

Oh- and if she paid by CC and it was £100+ she can do a Section 75 claim
www.which.co.uk/consumer-rights/regulation/section-75-of-the-consumer-credit-act If it was a debit card, the chargeback is an option as a PP said www.which.co.uk/consumer-rights/problem/how-do-i-use-chargeback

I've had a fight on my hands over a chargeback before, so sometimes you need to be a bit persistent: and Section 75 only applies if you are paying directly for something- so if you use a site like Groupon, say, but the merchant won't honour the deal, you won't be covered. (I realise that's not the case - this is a just for future reference one, as I didn't know that and nearly lost over a hundred quid when I thought I was actaully protecting myself by paying by CC Smile)

balletgirlmum · 10/12/2015 14:56

I would send her a Letter Before Claim couched in official language. It's a letter you have to by law send someone before taking them to small claims. If you do it yourself (I have a template at work) it costs nothing except the postage & 95% of the time people get panicked because they know you are serious etc & they pay up.

karalime · 10/12/2015 14:56

Also yes to hefzi. It's amazing the number of people who claim that they did not receive an order, who then magically find it or never contact you again after you tell them that you will refund them once they have signed a declaration of non receipt from Royal Mail, as this is clearly a serious theft problem that must be investigated Hmm

Original poster
CiritheLionessofCintra · 10/12/2015 15:01

Thank you for the detailed post, hef. I'm currently looking up CAB now and I'm also going to contact Royal Mail and get their opinion on this as it was their training service DD used.

If I'm honest I was hoping the mention of small claims would shake her since we never planned to actually do it. I'm going to contact DD's bank as I think that's the best course of action we can take.

The dress plus postage costed 40 Shock Not a lot to some but it would be a hit to DD's wages.

OP posts:
middlethird · 10/12/2015 15:17

Rage.

Good luck to your daughter OP. Don't let them beat you!

PastaPrincess · 10/12/2015 16:10

Is the business on facebook by any chance? There have been a lot of sponsored posts by scam companies recently. Items don't turn up or if they do they're awful quality and very different from the photos.

ShamefulPlaceMarker · 10/12/2015 16:37

I'd be bombarding her fb page with bad reviews... Just keep posting them!

ShamefulPlaceMarker · 10/12/2015 16:39

Also, if it's recorded delivery it is insured up to £50 so you could claim through post office?

kali110 · 10/12/2015 16:52

I would claim for postage to.
I would try to get money through bank.
Your covered on cc but not sure on debit cards.
She sounds like a con artist.
Id be telling the seller i want a refund and postsge costs back or ill see her in court.

Original poster
CiritheLionessofCintra · 10/12/2015 16:58

I never even thought of claiming through the post! Brilliant, Shame.

I've been in contact with DD's bank and they've agreed to refund the money she lost. So all is going well! Smile

OP posts:
DisappointedOne · 10/12/2015 17:21

This is your ADULT daughter's problem. You can help her to solve it, but doing it for her won't help in the long run.

bloodyteenagers · 10/12/2015 17:24

I would reply back saying

As instructed by you the dress was returned as you had sent out the wrong item.
This was tracked and shows that it was signed by xx, on xx date at xx time.
You then claimed that the details were faked on our end. So now you have given no other option other than to seek legal action which you say is an over reaction.
It is not an over reaction and unless this is resolved by 14 December 2015 the next contact you will have will be legal proceedings for the monies spent on the dress and the return as a result of your error. I will also be claiming back all legal costs from you as well.

Stasie · 10/12/2015 17:25

Uh, Royal mail won't pay out if they have a signature or proof of delivery - why would they?

Don't bring them into it. This person has ripped off your daughter and as such she needs to cough up.

I would send the letter before action. She sounds like she was spooked by your suggestion of taking her to court. So follow it up.

Stasie · 10/12/2015 17:26

Oh and name and shame on here if all else fails - other people can post on her fb page, even if she blocks you. It's terrible for business and will see her losing a lot more unless she pays you what she owes you.

DoreenLethal · 10/12/2015 17:27

My DD works very hard for her money and the thought of her being ripped off like this really upsets me, though I could be hormonal and unreasonable.

Why would the upset felt at the thought of your daughter being ripped off be unreasonable and down to your hormones? I don't get this 'am I hormonal' line. Why do you perpetuate the myth that all women's issues are down to their hormones?

jemimavintage · 10/12/2015 17:51

I sell womens stuff online and there's NO WAY I would want anyone saying anything negative about my items cos it would really affect my trading, so I always bend over backwards to make sure all customers are A-ok with what they buy!! I despise people who sell online and try to rip people off, and it makes it worse that it's an 18 year old who is new to working & buying with her own money. Trying to reason with the seller sounds like it's a futile activity if they're now having the gall to argue with you in the fact of evidence!!! jeezzzzzz.....some people...

If it's one of the selling platforms, contact them (and contact paypal, as a previous poster said). They are usually really good at supporting buyers, generally taking the buyers side over the sellers.

jemimavintage · 10/12/2015 17:56

I used to think that DoreenLethal, but after the last 2 months of really awful hormonal issues....I have now seen first hand that in fact, hormones dictate quite a lot when it comes to mood/coping/womens life in general. Wow....are the effects powerful for some women... Prior to this experience, I used to blow talk of hormones off as 'wimpy'.... Not no more!!!!!!! And I now really regret being flippant about such things...

HackerFucker22 · 10/12/2015 17:56

Is everyone forgetting the wrong dress was sent to begin with and it took a lot longer than specified delivery time. There is no way DD should have paid the postage to return it. I'd be pointing this out to seller, as well as the paper trail and threatening bad reviews on fb / ebay - wherever she sells.

Stasie · 10/12/2015 17:57

I suspect there is a reason she doesn't accept paypal.

Original poster
CiritheLionessofCintra · 10/12/2015 18:19

Ah yes, Disappointed and adults never need help do they? Hmm

Though yes I agree, Stasie. No point in bringing Royal Mail into this.

I asked about my hormones, Doreen because I'm heavily pregnant and wanted outside views to make sure I wasn't over reacting.

Though I got the issue sorted with DD's bank it's been a learning curb for her. The problem was she trusted this seller's site because it was recommended by friends, I suppose now she'll learn to do more research about where she shops online.

OP posts: