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AIBU?

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Original poster

to think this is ridiculous Christmas card etiquette ?

118 replies

rubymallorywhite · 09/12/2015 19:00

I don't really do Christmas cards,
The odd one to far flung relatives & close family.

Picked my daughter up today from nursery & the nursery assistant is oh don't forget this...

To L,
Love H

My eyes nearly fell out my head.

She's 2.5!!!!

Nursery girl says well I can give you a list of them all, or the ones L plays with most (can't just single some out?)
Me: How many are there ?
Nursery girl: over 30
Me: is it not a ballache handing them out ?
Nursery girl: We'll just pop them in trays.

AIBU to think this is fucking insane writing out over 30 Christmas cards to TODDLERS?

Fair doos when they're in a class of school chums but TODDLERS.

I'll get her to make one for the whole class... One... To them all,
At a push.

Holy festive fuckballs.

OP posts:
JarethTheGoblinKing · 09/12/2015 21:33

Yes! Lots and lots of glitter. Chocolate coin as a decoy.

JakeyBurd · 09/12/2015 21:42

Wi ye oan that yin ruby

I hate Christmas cards with a passion and think we should be doing everything in our power to deter the LOs, not encourage them.

Apart from the ecological waste, I have seen them result more in arguments than joy. From school card-snubbings (i.e. one person deliberately being left out of the cards) to a full-blown fight in an office when one person decided to donate her card money to charity instead of sending one to everyone she worked with, and got berated for being "selfish", while one actually took back the card they gave her the day before.

Believe me, setting toddlers up for the very same is indeed fucking insane.

Then there's the family arguments when someone complains that the card they got is "too wee", or "a hand-written message instead of a flowery pre-printed sentiment? How dare you!" or "What, no glitter?". I've had them all, hence my hatred of fucking things.

Don't do it, OP, it'll only end in tears!

Birdsgottafly · 09/12/2015 21:56

""Maybe it's alright when your kids can write them themselves, but what's the point of me writing cards for 75 kids only to receive cards written by the parents of those 75 kids?""

I wouldn't do it for children so young.

But my DD was in a SN school and that was the norm for most of the school, especially upto about 14.

It was just teaching a possible social norm.

I don't personally give Christmas cards, it's one aspect that I've dropped.

Apathyisthenewblah · 09/12/2015 21:56

We got a list from DDs nursery today. I'm afraid I laughed and put it in my pocket never to be seen again. I only really do cards for close family and friends.

NoSquirrels · 09/12/2015 22:00

Thet want to do them but I have to check no ones been unintentionally forgotten/ had a too truthful message inserted

This made me Grin. Yes, have had to erase/advise upon the too truthful festive message before now!

Hygellig · 09/12/2015 22:01

DS got one or two cards from other children I didn't know when he was at playgroup (aged 3), so fortunately it appears that most parents didn't bother. It seems like a waste of time, money and paper to me, unless the children happen to be into cards. I hadn't planned on DD giving any out at playgroup (she only does two sessions) and I really hope that DS doesn't ask to give any out at Reception either.

When he got his birthday cards recently (he had a class party) some of the children had written in neat and tidy writing "Happy Birthday X", whereas in his dad's birthday card, DS got as far as writing "hapee" then decided he'd had enough. So I can't see him sitting writing out 29 cards!

reni2 · 09/12/2015 22:01

I didn't write any at that age. When they wanted to (aged 3 maybe?) they did some squiggles and stuck a smiley on and I labelled envelopes. They tended to tire out after 5 friends. At school, whatever they want to do. Has been whole class, has been 7 cards in total, I don't interfere, I don't think it matters.

SpellBookandCandle · 09/12/2015 22:06
Original poster
rubymallorywhite · 09/12/2015 22:27

Private Pike: yes, affa close to the Northern lights of Aberdeen!

OP posts:
ClancyMoped · 09/12/2015 22:36

YANBU (you were also NB sneers or rage'y Smile )

I wouldn't do it because I wouldn't be bothered. I can't imagine the kids would be that bothered either.

Flashbangandgone · 09/12/2015 22:37

Can't imagine mine having the patience to gladly write Christmas cards to 30 children!

BelleEsme · 09/12/2015 22:47

My DD started school this September. There are 45 children and 7 teachers in her class.

Hell will freeze over before i write that many Christmas cards (i detest writing Christmas cards! lol)

They will be getting one card to the whole class and a charity donation will be made for the amount of money that would have been spent.

Minisoksmakehardwork · 10/12/2015 06:21

Aw it's sweet. The kids love sending and receiving them. Thankfully this year ds1 is now able to write his own cards. So dd1 and ds1 have their class lists so no one gets left out accidentally. I have the preschool list and will have to write out 20 cards twice as I have twins. But it's worth it as they'll also get to squiggle in them and share the joy of making a friend happy. I'm pretty sure they won't know some of the kids as they don't go every day. But again, better to send one or two when they don't know the child than rely on a 3.5 year old telling you who they play with.

FellOffMyUnicorn · 10/12/2015 09:33

"AIBU to think this is fucking insane writing out over 30 Christmas cards to TODDLERS?"

I put sneery because thats how this read to me - also, "fucking insane" and CAPS? looks ragey to me

Pengweng · 10/12/2015 10:01

I agree it's annoying and unnecessary and i swore I would not do it. Until the DTs came home last week from nursery (attached to local primary, they are 3) with cards and got really excited about writing their own. So i caved and bought some. To be fair thought i wrote the persons name in and then they wrote their own name (legible so i didn't feel i needed to do it again). It was still 46 cards i had to sort out plus now i will get 46 cards back, i'm hoping most of the mums won't bother!! Next year i will try not to cave in but they were so sweet and happy about their friends cards. Grin

RubbleBubble00 · 10/12/2015 10:04

Throw bag sweets in for them.to take.some.home on last day

Original poster
rubymallorywhite · 10/12/2015 10:28

Unicorn seriously you sound like you need a warm hug or something !

OP posts:
FellOffMyUnicorn · 10/12/2015 10:34

Smile thank you

Topseyt · 10/12/2015 13:19

I never went in for this malarkey when mine were small.

They didn't do cards for their friends until they could write them themselves. They were then provided with a cheapo box of cards and left to it.

I'd have lost the will to live if I had taken on that task.

Solongtoshort · 11/12/2015 11:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jamtartandcustard · 11/12/2015 11:18

My 3 year old was so happy to receive some cards from his friends as opposed to just watching his big brother and sister get them. Luckily he goes to the most amazing pre-school and his wonderful key worker said if we wanted to just send him in with some cards and she would help him write them which we did. So he was very proud and handed out his cards with zero hassle from us. Perfect Xmas Grin

missmargot · 11/12/2015 11:30

I sent Christmas cards into nursery yesterday, not for all of the children but for those in the same room as DS (written jointly to their siblings at nursery if they have them). I didn't last year and hadn't planned to this year but DS received a couple and got so excited about them. It only took 10 minutes to write the cards and I don't expect one back from everyone.

Judging by some of the responses on this thread I'm probably being cursed by parents as we speak.

latrilllis · 11/12/2015 11:32

My dc have three syllable first names [bad parent emoticon] and it took them a while to master a recognisable signature. dd2 in yr1 still misses out the odd letter. So in a way I considered writing cards for 29 classmates as good handwriting practice Grin. I think it's bonkers in nursery though.

We had the first card from school home in mid November Hmm

NeverNic · 11/12/2015 11:56

Have just sent my 3yo in with cards this week. One little boy was so excited and grateful, that he kept saying thank you and showing everyone what he got. Time was well spent to see those moments of joy, so I'm glad I did it. I did write one for every child because when it came down to it there was only a small amount of children he doesnt play with. I'd already bought cards, so it seemed a bit silly not to just do the lot.

I think there are two camps generally on cards. People who do them and people who don't. I'm not offended if I don't get one back or if people think.it's silly. I like doing them so I do it.

x2boys · 11/12/2015 12:12

I can relate ds is disabled goes to a special. School he us oblivious to Xmas cards and non verbal let alone being able to write but I got a list of who was in his class plus teachers so I dutifully filled out Xmas cards for him ds will have no intereat in any cards he receives Grin

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