there is a tree in the garden looking at me funny

[Owllady]

It has wide eyes and a shocked mouth
Tosser
I'm not bu

It's probably cross because you haven't put any twinkly lights on it. Maybe you should.

Or if there are already twinkly lights on it maybe that's the reason why it's cross.

"It's put on weight."

Well that's a bit rude. We all put on a bit of timber from time to time.

Maybe it's suffering from PMTree.

PMTree

Did you just pick one of its apples?

Tree: "How would you like it if I came along, and picked something off of you?"
Scarecrow: "Come on, Dorothy. You don't want any of those apples, do you?"
Tree: "Are you saying my apples aren't what they ought to be?"
Scarecrow: "No. It's just that she doesn't like little green worms!"

Wrap it in tinsel and drink more

I'm beginning to think you left the lid off the Evostick a bit longer than was entirely necessary.

Fat birch

PMTree best mn post of the evening 🎄👌

It wants to be a christmas tree. lights will make it happy

Oh I love you all 🌳

Go out all nonchalant like and light a match near it. Show it who's boss.

Just leave it alone will you?

I'm picturing this
tobitoro.deviantart.com/art/spooky-trees-with-faces-165306399

I think you should ask why it is so upset.

Is it horney? bahaha.

Maybe log it with the police? Or wood that be unreasonable?

Perhaps it's the Special Branch.

Watch out with this wind OP, it might start throwing things at your house!

Now, now. Don't go planting ideas in her head.

Perhaps it's put on weight because it's eaten someone? I should be very careful if I were you.

But on the other hand it might be feeling a little green.

OP, how is this whole thing not your fault? You complain "there is a tree in the garden looking at me funny" well for goodness' sake woman, put your funny away and the then tree can't look at it! Can it? It's hardly tree surgery!
Tsk!

Don't tie yourself up in knots about this, OP. I'm sure you'll soon get to the root of the problem. It sounds like it's best nipped in the bud ASAP, else it'll run rings around you.

I am not joking about this but the night after I had DS2 I honestly thought some pansies were laughing at me. It was the weirdest thing ever.

Elephant oo-er 😨 That's a bit Alice in Wonderland trippy.

(Just in case, OP you are alright aren't you?)

Is it George Bush?

Or Donald Trunk?

The first is just stupid, the second is evil, I would hide.