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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

help DH is taking the mickey..!

49 replies

BreadEyes · 29/11/2015 20:14

Honestly. God knows I am a tolerant person - I have 2 children haha!! But DH is old enough to realise that it very much gets my goat when he does not clean up after himself! He leaves his clothes every which way and recently he has been laughing at me with our two children! The cheek. And just yesterday I heard ds saying "I have left my clothes on the floor for the laundry lady to find" WE DO NOT HAVE A LAUNDRY LADY!! That's right, dh has taught our kids to be as lazy as he is Angry Help what do I do to change this behaviour??!?!

OP posts:
Thattimeofyearagain · 29/11/2015 20:15

You tell him to grow the fuck up and behave like an adult.

Creiddylad · 29/11/2015 20:16

Don't do his laundry unless he picks it up and puts it in the laundry basket.

That is what I do with my teenagers.

Thattimeofyearagain · 29/11/2015 20:17

Or just stop doing his laundry.

RunRabbitRunRabbit · 29/11/2015 20:17

In our house only the laundry in the basket gets washed.

If DH behaved like that I would never wash any of his clothes again. He is a grown up he can use the machine for his stuff.

You are the parent. If the child deliberately makes more work for you and insults you, you make them fix the problem and punish them for the insult.

AgentProvocateur · 29/11/2015 20:17

You stop being such a doormat and let him do his own laundry.

milaforni · 29/11/2015 20:18

^ this

LimitedSedition · 29/11/2015 20:18

I call strike.

Plomino · 29/11/2015 20:18

You do nothing . As in literally , do nothing . They have a wife and a mother , not fucking domestic staff . And when they have no clean clothes , or dinner , or can't find a clean cup to drink out out , maybe they might learn some fucking respect .

Canyouforgiveher · 29/11/2015 20:19

For your husband, you stop doing his laundry - leave it on the floor and walk around it - or on walk on it if you like. If that doesn't work, pick it up and put it in the bin.

For your son if he is a teen - ditto as for husband.

If your son is a child, then march him down to where he left the clothes, stand over him until he picks them up and puts them in the right place and then tell him very crossly not to ever do that again. Like you do with other things he does that need to be changed.

museumum · 29/11/2015 20:21

My dh does his own laundry. Not to do with any sort of argument or to prove a point but we've just found it easier to wash separately except one towels and sheets wash. Ds's clothes form one wash and whoever gets the chance gets his stuff done.

milaforni · 29/11/2015 20:22

Oops...cross post. I was aiming at Creiddylad's post. But all the rest are good to. ⚡️⚡️

Lweji · 29/11/2015 20:23

He does his own laundry and the kids. You tell them to give the clothes to the Lord of the Laundry.
He irons them too.

Original poster
BreadEyes · 29/11/2015 20:24

Oh believe me I have tried this but none of them responds well to critiscism. I fear I have spoiled them too much.... but I simply cannot abide a dirty house

OP posts:
Krampus · 29/11/2015 20:26

Shout at your partner to not be so fucking stupid.
Don't wash his clothes.
Shout at children to pick up own clothes.

ShebaShimmyShake · 29/11/2015 20:27

The laundry lady should leave his clothes in a muddy puddle outside.

Thumbcat · 29/11/2015 20:28

You're not doing your son's future partners any favours by letting him get away with being as lazy and disrespectful as your husband.

longdiling · 29/11/2015 20:28

Put the clothes in a bin bag. Put them out for the bin men.

motherinferior · 29/11/2015 20:28

If it's the stuff lying around you don't like, Buy a nice-looking laundry basket and put all their laundry in it. And leave it.

Arfarfanarf · 29/11/2015 20:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

munkisocks · 29/11/2015 20:29

I usually say I couldn't find their clothes to wash so they haven't been washed and they should go find them instead. Results in DH going looking when he realises his jeans aren't clean and neatly hung in wardrobe.

Or get all the dirty clothes off the floor and put them in his bed under duvet for him to find when he goes to bed.

Goingtobeawesome · 29/11/2015 20:31

So because they don't respond well to criticism you become a mug? Yeah, you need to rethink that.

Some of my kids are not getting it so two weeks running one hasn't had any pocket money. They are so cross they have refused to eat tea. The other has got reduced money and the one who did all his jobs and got full money last week got nothing today. Kitchen looks a mess but I'm ignoring. I'm not a fucking slave.

mintoil · 29/11/2015 20:32

If you cannot bear an untidy house then explain that any dirty clothes left on floor "for the laundry lady" will be tidied into the bin. See how he likes that?

Doesn't sound like he respects you at all.

FoxesSitOnBoxes · 29/11/2015 20:32

I'm like you so I pick it up and put it in his side of the bed all neat under the covers so I can't see it

Paintedhandprints · 29/11/2015 20:37

Wow. Your 'dh' does not really respect you does he? Does he have any redeeming qualities? Teaching your own children to mock you? I would be tearing dh a new one. Not sure what to do with kids. They are just following your and dh's lead for behavior. I wouldn't have tolerated this behavior. Perhaps you should hire an actual cleaning lady? AngryShock

lorelei9 · 29/11/2015 20:40

how about you pick up the dirty laundry DH drops on the floor, put it in the basket so it's not bugging you - but don't do his laundry?

with the kids I would say to them that they have to pick it up or you won't do it - that should work on the kids..? How old are they?

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