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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not let ds go on THIS school trip to...

149 replies

alltheworld · 14/11/2015 00:41

...Toysrus...
Their theme is toys this term and have just had letter back saying this will be educational and enjoyable and they may take five quid spending money.

I fail to see how this is educational
It is commercial
We are broke and my life is spent managing dc's expectations down and I specifically avoid toy shops esp. At this time of year.

OP posts:

Fluffy24 · 14/11/2015 09:41

Can you speak to other parents, presumably you're not the only one a bit about kids going on a school trip to a toy superstore less than 6 weeks before Xmas?!

bettyberry · 14/11/2015 09:59

My DC had this topic. The school asked the parents if they still had their childhood toys and could they borrow them for the day and could the parent write a bit about them. So the teachers effectively set up their own toy museum and were really careful with the toys. Labelled them up so they went back to the right parent.

I sent in my 1950's chad valley bear with some info about how old he was and how long I had him. The kids loved it.

GoblinLittleOwl · 14/11/2015 10:11

I absolutely agree with your concerns over this school trip, even though it may be more educational than you think.

You do need to go into school and express your concerns, giving all the reasons you have written here, including the cost; you seem to have a good relationship with the school so you are in a strong position to make your point. I would expect that the trip has been arranged by enthusiastic, childless teachers who think they are giving the class a lovely day out, with no idea of the pressures these sort of stores exert. It is unlikely they will agree with you or cancel the trip, but it will give them pause for thought.

Please don't refuse to let your son go; he will have such a boring day and then have to see all his classmates returning with their purchases. If the topic is 'Toys' they should be doing follow-up work concerned with the visit, so he will feel even more excluded. You have very sound ethical reasons for refusing to pay and they cannot exclude your son if you do refuse because it is a class activity in school time.

I think some of these school trips are anything but educational; the children enjoy them but half the fun comes out of going out of class in school time, the trip on the coach, having a picnic lunch somewhere different, and buying something from the shop. The educational part is incidental. The cost is now much higher than parents taking their children individually, and puts a real strain on family budgets.

So please do express your concerns; they are completely justifiable, (but let your son go if you possibly can.)

AnnaBegins · 14/11/2015 10:17

I can totally believe this, we did a school trip to lidl with our German class one year, then had a picnic with what we bought!

The tesco farm to fork scheme is well respected and lots of scout groups go on it.

The toy museum sounds more sensible though. This might be impossible but could you take the day off and take him there instead? (For anyone in Derbyshire I recommend the Sudbury hall museum of childhood).

That's what we're planning to do if we're still in this village when DS goes to school as they have a week long trip that we assumed would be an outdoor activities week, but is actually just trips to a few museums (the kids aren't even allowed to visit the nearby beach!) so we plan to schedule a week of fun outdoor adventures that week instead. The scouts want us to start this plan immediately so we can take them!

PaulAnkaTheDog · 14/11/2015 11:42

Poor Pinot I bet she needed a coffee this morning.

catfordbetty · 14/11/2015 15:25

Do parents really complain to schools about everything these days or just on MN?

I think they are whipped up into a frenzy of righteous indignation on MN and then complain.

Original poster

alltheworld · 14/11/2015 19:56

Ok. I am not a troll. This is not made up.
Today bumped into a couple of other mums and dads and they also unhappy.
Also found out year 4 going to tesco next week. That I could just about live with.
I can see the value of going behind the scenes but this should be in a shop that makes something and not a shop designed to flog overpriced branded goods to kids.
I do take my responsibility as a parent to manage my kids expectations. They walk past the ice cream van, they know we are poor, we have discussions in the toy aisles of sainsburys etc etc
It is not the schools place to take kids on this kind of trip.
Contrary to what one pp said I cannot see that any child needs a school trip to a shop because they might not get to go to one otherwise!
It is not just about the fiver spending money which I cannot afford and which would be spent on tat. It is about shoving branded goods in my kids face in the run up to Christmas.
And yes, it will be sad to be left behind at school and shit to have to sit through the nonsense follow up but that falls squarely on the school.
I won't be complaining to the school as the issues are so obvious. I am just not letting my kid go.
Can you imagine if I took my kid out of a morning or literacy and maths to do this? I think next terms topic is Egyptians..shall I take a term time holiday to look at the pyramids?

OP posts:

Original poster

alltheworld · 14/11/2015 20:02

Could a trip to a toy superstore be made educational? Yes, discussions about advertising, branding, marketing genders stuff etc.
But most things can be made educational, as I am sure home Edders would agree.
I could keep Es out of school most days and educate him in some way.
This is just not on.
We also have not been asked for coach money or told this is being funded by the school fund so the cynic in me wonders if the store is giving the school some money or some other benefit?

OP posts:

fastdaytears · 14/11/2015 20:05

I think with Farm to Fork (the tesco one) the store can give some money towards transport, so that could be what's happening here.

BlueJug · 14/11/2015 20:15

I was Waitrose a few weeks ago and there was a primary class there. They were having a great time identifying the fish on the fresh fish counter. The Fish Man was lovely with them and was explaining the difference between sea fish and freshwater fish. talking about how big some of the fish were, (not easy to tell from fillets), and how to cook them. The kids were loving it! They were laughing and interested - and learning! It made my day just watching them.

mudandmayhem01 · 14/11/2015 20:25

My ds went on one to the toby carvery, which I slightly dubious about but they got them tasting different vegetables, looking at balanced diets. They then had a free mini roast dinner. Each child got a free kids meal voucher ( with a purchased adult meal) which I threw away. Obviously trying increase the profile of the restaurant locally but it did mean the children had a free trip out in times when everything is so stretched.

Original poster

alltheworld · 14/11/2015 20:27

So it could be a case of...let us pay you to bring 60 7 year olds into our store in the run up to Christmas. They will have a potential spend of 300 quid. We get to show them all the toys they can ask their parents for. We will show them the stock room to give it an educational veneer.

OP posts:

BathshebaDarkstone · 14/11/2015 20:30

Even DD 8 says that's a rubbish school trip.

Original poster

alltheworld · 14/11/2015 20:36

D s isn't bothered about going. Toysrus could sponsor something at the school fair and that money could be used on a proper school trip

OP posts:

70isaLimitNotaTarget · 14/11/2015 20:36

TBH, I'd be more pissed off at the trip to the Petshop.
A whole group of children in a Petshop is unerving for the animals.
And I detest Petshops anyway.

Unless they are animal-free or make a point of stocking no live animals from Dec onwards.

DrWhooves · 14/11/2015 20:38

DD was meant to go on the tesco farm to fork one last year if she hadn't been off with chickenpox. I wasn't too fussed about that one, I don't shop in tesco anyway so it wouldn't have had any effect on us in terms of advertising, but I don't think I'd be happy about a trip to toys r us, especially as you're expected to send spending money. DD already asks for every piece of tat she sees in an advert, I don't need them adding to that pestering.

Passmethecrisps · 14/11/2015 20:40

It sounds like a living hell for all concerned. Mind you I remember going on a school trip to a battery chicken farm.

RueDeWakening · 14/11/2015 21:06

YANBU, I wouldn't want my kids visiting ToysRUs at this time of year either.

Tesco do loads of school and community group trips btw for any doubters - I took my Rainbows there last summer, as part of the store's Farm to Fork project (Google it, there's a whole website all about it).

It was great - we had a nosy round the warehouse bit (the Rainbows loved the walk in freezer most of the whole trip!), tasted some fruit, had a talk from the guy at the fish counter, and came away with a goody bag with exercise books, pencils and leaflets for each child.

RueDesTroisFreres · 14/11/2015 22:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PrinceHansOfTheTescoAisles · 14/11/2015 23:09

Ds did the Tesco trip and loved it. Came home all enthused about making his own ham sandwiches. It sounds lame to us but it's exciting for them to be treated like Tesco VIPs.

A spending trip to TRU where they'll see loads of stuff they can't afford though? Noooo...

UterusUterusGhali · 14/11/2015 23:25

My DD went on a school trip to Ikea.
She hated it. Said it was utterly pointless.

It's not as bad as Toys r Us though! That's just going to whip the children into a toy frenzy. At least my kid didn't come out demanding Expedit storage ffs.

Original poster

alltheworld · 16/11/2015 21:06

Update as promised..head listened to parent concerns and explained that the visit will look at how toys are chosen and designed and that the pupils would not be allowed to take spending money but would get a free gift instead

OP posts:

UterusUterusGhali · 17/11/2015 21:04

Thanks for the update .

Do you think you'll let him go in light of this?

Original poster

alltheworld · 17/11/2015 22:21

No, because I still don't think it is educational, I think it is commercial and a cynical move to get 60 school kids excited about branded toys in the runup to Christmas.
The store is now giving a free gift instead of suggesting five pounds spending money. This has satisfied a lot of parents, to be fair.

OP posts:

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