To be sick and tired of being responsible for everything!

[PurpleTreeFrog]

When I say responsible, I mean mentally responsible, for remembering, organising and delegating things. It's like, sure, DH will wash up and tidy the kitchen and look after DS and so on... but only because I've told him to.

If I went on strike, nothing would get done. If I went on strike, and we went out for a day out somewhere, our toddler would be bundled into the car with no shoes, no hat, no bag of nappies or wipes or drink or snacks.

If I went on strike, the kitchen would be permanently dirty and full of washing up. The living room would be cluttered with toys that would never get put away. Our son would watch Twirlywoos for hours on end with DH just being on his laptop, only paying him attention when he starts to grizzle. I'm positive that our bed would have stinky unwashed sheets on it for literally months if I didn't change them. Our sons bedsheets or clothes wouldn't get changed until they're visibly very very dirty. DS would never be out of pyjamas.

If I went on strike DS would eat the same two meals on constant rotation with no thought to nutritional value or variety.

If I went on strike no-one in the house would have any clean laundry until the socks and pants run out.

I feel like I do everything and it's still not enough. If something in the house goes missing or gets broken, or theres no fresh towel in the bathroom, or I leave a cleaning cloth wet and it goes smelly, or I dont have time to put the clothes out to dry immediately when theyre washed so they end up a bit damp smelling, or I accidentally leave a light on or have the heating too high, I get complained at!

Should I just go on bloody strike?!

Sometimes I think being a single mum would actually be easier as I'd be doing the same amount of work without the constant pissed off feeling that DH should take on more of the responsibility, and without the constant conflict and tension from me nagging. At least if I was a single mum DS could go and stay with DH for designated days where he would HAVE to look after him 100% giving me free time to do what I want or need.

Urgh. It's so bloody draining.

/rant

Me too. I feel all your pain. Dh has many good qualities and is a great Dad but leaves everything up to me which is so stressful. He will do jobs and housework and isn't lazy by any means.
At the minute his mum is really ill so he its even worse as I am trying to sort out all her stuff as well - benefits, house sale, meditation etc and I do wake up in the middle of the night in a cold sweat at times remembering the things I have forgotton to do. He is doing all the practical stuff though for her (3 visits a day, meals etc ).
The days out and holidays too..... so familiar. Mr Laid back doesn't mind what we do or where we go ...... except for the 10 things I suggest, oh and if its crap its my fault for suggesting it in the first place.
I told him to sort out a solicitors query fir her (needed stuff signing etc), still sat on the side 3 weeks later, other stuff is the same so no point going on strike.
Can't offer any practical advice op just my sympathy

evelynj

"he will pick the most useless & unhelpful things to do I'm sure of it, until I give him some direction, which he will then resent!"

Yy to this. H does this. I went Xmas shopping for 2 hours y'day.
I put the sunday chicken in the oven on low before I went. asked him to keep an eye on it. Pls put the veg on at 4.30.

Came back to burnt chicken, boiled dry potato pan. The laundry which just needed tumbling and putting on radiators is in such a state it will have to be re-washed. He'd mended a piece of furniture though....

But, if I even look less than hugely impressed / about to put out the bunting re his efforts then I am the most unreasonable bitch in the world.

Also - his trump card - " I couldn't do it because you'd accuse me of doing it wrong".

I could put up with the scattiness lack of adult responsibility if it weren't for the nastiness about it all. Everything, even making a cup of tea, involves eyerolling and sighing.
I think I have to LTB, I really do.

I could have written this post! But plus I do all the DIY lol