to think my date was cheeky?

[iwanttobeadixon]

So from dating this guy for a while I kind of get the impression that he might be very tight.

Or that he'd be more generous if I was his girlfriend.

(I never expect the man to pay for everything btw but it doesn't exactly feel even right now)

We went to see a game last night, I suggested and bought the tickets (cost me around £40) he never offered to pay me back. Which was fine as I was the one who suggested that night out.

We were running late so we just grabbed a McDonalds before the game - which he paid for. He sat there and complained that the meal had cost £10.

During the break he went to get a coffee for himself. I handed him £5 and said I'm just going to toilet and could you please get me a coffee as well (as the queue for the womens I knew would be really long).

I came back and he handed me my change and he'd clearly bought himself a coffee out of my money too.

Aibu to think this is so cheeky?

It's not the money it's more the fact that he did it. He clearly had no intention of buying me a coffee but was more than happy to use my money to get him one after I'd paid for the night out.

Talk some sense into me.

yeah - he's tight.
ditch him.
meanness is a disease with no known cure.

Ugh.

As for whoever said he might not have been to the cash point: if someone had paid for the tickets and i didn't have enough cash to get us both a coffee, then I certainly wouldn't go to get myself one either.

That's just wrong.

Sazzle I've just remembered, with my date, we stayed in a posh hotel in London one weekend (he worked for a well known booking company).

We were about to go out for dinner after some drinks, I even had vouchers for The Real Greek and he said he wanted to go to McDs - I put my foot down that night but the next night ta da it was McDs.... I think I even paid for our Real Greek meal....

DTMFA. This will only get worse. It's utterly soul destroying. And not worth it.

I went out with a tightwad. On our first date he spent about 30 minutes flicking through a discount voucher book to find the best place to eat.. on my birthday he took me out for a meal at a really nice steak restaurant and said 'oh the chicken looks good you'd love that' I wanted a fucking steak.
When the bill came and he paid (he'd made the gesture of treating me because it was my birthday) he said huffily 'thats me on beans on toast for the rest of the month then'
Twat. I should have run when I noticed he had a change purse.

The tight ass twat should not of taken the coffee money off you, especially as he had his tickets paid for

Agree it's about fairness.

He's not being fair. He's not concerned about being equal, he's trying to make sure he gets a better deal than you. This is more than tightness, this is meanness.

Mean people are rarely mean in just one area of their lives. Now it's money, but he is trying to get a better deal than you and only pay what he has to. Therefore, don't be surprised if effort and time are other areas he starts being mean in later on, if he only does what he has to do, and is happiest if you are putting more effort or time in than him. This is someone who'll remind you they unloaded the dishwasher last time and it's your turn, when you are in the middle of scrubbing the shower (which really should be their turn).

Agree with everything Dinosaur says. This isn't cheeky, it's unfair, unpleasant and taking advantage of your good nature. I'd seriously think about getting rid.

I can't think of anything more unattractive. I'm on a pretty tight budget due to some personal debt thanks to stupidity in my younger years but I'm not rude and cheeky about it like this guy!

Does it feel like spending time with him would enhance your life?

It doesn't sound like it.

Ewwwwww

But I think it's petty and unattractive to go dividing things all the time.
Maybe he thought this was your treat, and then next week, his plan was to treat you all evening ???
Point is, we are just speculating - or projecting? - the only way for OP to know, is to raise it with him.... you know, talk to someone. If he takes the huff and gets offended well it's no loss anyway, but if that's not his normal personna, then you won't have chucked him for something and nothing.

If someone asked me on a DATE to an event I wouldn't try to pay for my ticket - but I would buy drinks etc during the evening.

If I wanted to see the again, I'd invite them to something and make it my treat the next time.

How rude he is! My friends husband is tight and i sometimes get the feeling she regrets marrying him! Get out now

I think I used to be less than generous - grew up in a very frugal family without much and just had not learnt that skill - my husband helped me when we first got together to better understand "protocol" - what was done and not done - now I'd like to think I'm the opposite of stingy or rude or tight with my money - but I did have to learn as an adult because it wasn't what my parents demonstrated at all and didn't just come naturally

The tickets, possibly BackforGood; but taking the fiver to buy the coffee that he decided he wanted? That is so shabby.

Yeah I agree with you there Vocational. It's one thing to be sensible with money and not waste it or throw it around recklessly, but you have to be able to enjoy it as well.

Scrooge is the definitive miserable sod with no sense of fun; maybe the OP's man needs a nighttime visit from Jacob Marley this christmas.

Ditch him - he is being extraordinarily tight-fisted. I had a BF like this many, many years ago. It was so embarrassing, as whenever we went out with a group, he was always the last to offer to pay his fair share for a round of drinks or whatever. I think I had a lucky escape there!

My Dad used to say - "He could peel an orange in his pocket, that one"