Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not want to go out with any money?

31 replies

sky1010 · 26/10/2015 20:22

I can't tell if I am being unreasonable or not.

My friend wants to go to an event, the night before I get paid, it's not a massive one-off, but the chance won't come around for a good few months. The event is free, but has a bar and goes on until late- so we would have usually got something nice for supper on the way back and a taxi.

This month has been so expensive. I have food in the cupboards and my bills are paid, but only about £6 of disposable income in my account.

She says we can have a few drinks at hers and not spend anything out.

I say, if I can't buy myself a few lemonades (with or without vodka) or get a taxi back if I need it, I don't want to go out. It's not about being able to spend £££ getting pissed, but generally being able to enjoy myself and have what I want.

Who is BU?

OP posts:
MrsDeathOfRats · 26/10/2015 20:25

Don't think either of you are being unreasonable by what you have written.

Your friend is trying to find a solution, which is unreasonable in itself.

You won't feel comfortable, which isn't unreasonable.

If she were stropping or pressuring you to go the. That is unreasonable, but if you don't want then don't.

ImperialBlether · 26/10/2015 20:26

If she could lend you the money, could you afford to pay her back the next day?

x2boys · 26/10/2015 20:29

how long willl you be out for and what time will you come home? when i,m due to be paid it usually clears in the bank by just after midnight can your friend not lend you some money for a few hours?

Ragwort · 26/10/2015 20:29

I guess it's probably not something you are hugely excited about so no, in those circumstances I just wouldn't go. I can't imagine wanting to go to anything if I was really hard up, I can understand how you wouldn't particularly enjoy the occasion.

It's always a bit difficult when you use the 'no money' explanation as other people often feel that can lend/sub you some money without really appreciating how you feel.

Original poster
sky1010 · 26/10/2015 20:31

I'd feel even less comfortable her lending me some money tbh Confused

She isn't pressuring me, but I can tell she's a bit miffed.

If it was something that was around the corner that we could pop into fine, but it would involve trekking into central London for and would usually be a 'proper night out'

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 26/10/2015 20:34

But if you were out after midnight, you could repay her the same night. Why would you feel uncomfortable with that?

Original poster
sky1010 · 26/10/2015 20:35

I would usually be very excited ragwort, the place does lovely cocktails and it sounds like a laugh.

Going out with no cash in your purse seems miserable to me though.

OP posts:
Original poster
sky1010 · 26/10/2015 20:37

My money usually goes in at 4am, so it wouldn't be a straightaway thing.

I don't like borrowing money, she earns considerably less than me and probably wouldn't have it in her budget to sub me for drinks and transport.

OP posts:
unimaginativename13 · 26/10/2015 20:48

Pay day loan??

That is what they are there for we use them for this as long as you do responsible borrowing. It'll probably cost you a few pounds on £100.

You borrow the money then set it up to come out at 5am the day after pay day.

Or just don't go.

HackerFucker22 · 26/10/2015 20:51

A pay day loan for a night out? No way!!

If you don't have the cash and can't do it cheaply then don't go.

DinosaursRoar · 26/10/2015 20:56

Don't get a pay day loan to just go on a night out, no matter how much you will enjoy it, you said it's not a 'one off' and if this month has been tough, don't borrow anything that'll make next month hard too.

You can't go. Tis shit, but being a grown up is sometimes. Sad

ImperialBlether · 26/10/2015 20:57

For god's sake, unimaginativename, you shouldn't be using a pay day loan for a night out! It affects your credit limit.

Just don't go, OP, if it's going to cause you too many problems.

Crinkle77 · 26/10/2015 20:57

Don't get a pay day loan for a night out. Plus it fucks up your credit rating. I's not worth it for a night out on the lash.

ImperialBlether · 26/10/2015 20:57

It affects your credit score, I mean.

PigletJohn · 26/10/2015 21:12

APR 4670%?

yes, that sounds reasonable.

BigChocFrenzy · 26/10/2015 21:29

Would transport cost you anything ? If so, bad idea.

Would you enjoy the event itself ? If so, you don't have to eat or drink out.
Maybe not your ideal night out, but more fun than staying home ?

Original poster
sky1010 · 26/10/2015 23:17

Payday loan for a night out bahahahah

Oh god, that's the worst advice I have ever received on here Grin

I doubt I'll be going, even if she texts me and tell me it's free a million more times. I was never one for going out on a fiver as a student either

OP posts:
whois · 26/10/2015 23:21

Pay day loan??

That is what they are there for we use them for this

Are you joking right? Did you take that straight off the 'worst advice ever' thread?

I can't believe that people actually borrow money from payday loan companies so they have have a 'night out'.

OP you aren't being U but neither is your friend.

BockCadger · 26/10/2015 23:42

I think unimaginative gets it Hmm lay off.

Don't go. You can't/don't want to borrow.
I agree, it's restricting going on a night out with a really tight budget.

Paddletonio · 26/10/2015 23:55

I would never use a payday loan for this but can be handy to have a credit card for these situations (get a 0% interest rate deal and ensure you regularly pay it off anyway)

tedhis · 27/10/2015 03:41

Send her the money by paypal from a credit card. It will cost you 35 plus 25p but much cheaper than a payday loan!

unimaginativename13 · 27/10/2015 04:57

Jeez guys!

The OP wasnt very forthcoming on any ideas so I had two suggestions Loan or don't go!

Me and my OH have use them a couple of times, ie if something comes up 2/3 days before pay day.

The interest on £150 is about £2.40 and people have suggested credit cards and PayPal too!!!

Not all people that borrow money are irresponsible!!!!

5oclocksomewhere · 27/10/2015 04:59

Ironic response given my username, but why do you need alcohol to the point you'd rather stay home and miss out entirely than enjoy the event without the booze?

tedhis · 27/10/2015 05:29

Whoops- paypal is 3% plus 25p

wotoodoo · 27/10/2015 06:07

Why don't you go but take a little water bottle with you and put your lemonade in that? Or ask for tap water with ice and lemon so that you get a glass and once you finished that, top it up with the lemonade or whatever you've brought with you?