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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have my daughters party on her actual birthday?

65 replies

Newtothis2015 · 26/10/2015 16:03

Since dd started school I have noticed all the parents do the child's party on the nearest weekend to their child's birthday. Last year dds birthday was on a Sunday so we had her party on the Sunday with family and school friends. This year her birthday is on a Monday so we will have her party after school on the Monday. We have done this since birth. Is this strange? My daughter said she wants two birthdays like the other children but I think it is really nice to celebrate on the actual day. It is nice isn't it? Or am I missing something?

OP posts:

NewMrsX · 26/10/2015 21:16

We did a Thurs night soft play party this year for my Dsis(5) 4-6pm. 14 out of 16 invited came so we had a good turn out and some parents did car share etc

Weekends do seem easier but the parties then tend to be in the middle of the day so nothing else can be planned. I prefer weeknights for this reason

DinosaursRoar · 26/10/2015 21:17

I wouldnt take DS (year 1) to a Monday night party finishing at 6pm, it would cock up the whole week if he was tired on a monday, then DC2 would be a nightmare if she's fallen asleep on the way home... reading wouldn't get done, it would be a rush to get there after school, probably having to drive to school pick up... It would be a hassle. Life with small children is hard enough, I don't need extra hassle.

Normal here is a party on the weekend, then a family party dinner on the day - don't think many people do big night out for actual birthday plus party.

HarrietSchulenberg · 26/10/2015 21:17

My kids never enjoyed going to weeknight parties as they usually just wanted to get home after a day at school. I stopped trying to take them after ds1 (then 7) feigned sickness in the middle of one party, later admitting that he'd "had enough of being with that lot all day" and just wanted to go home and play with his Playmobil.

I also used to struggle to get mine to parties as if I was working my mum had to do all the extra fetching and carrying, which I didn't think was fair.

That said, we did have ds2's party on a Friday after school, which worked really well. I picked all the kids up and they walked back with me, then patents picked up between 6 and 7.

Bimblywibble · 27/10/2015 11:33

DinosaursRosr I thought exactly the same about a Monday night, but I let my YR go as she was so desperate to. To my surprise it was totally fine in reality.

Bubbletree4 · 27/10/2015 11:38

Mine have not been invited to a weeknight party for several years now. They go to a lot of parties. Tbh I don't think it's really the done thing. People have commitments after school.

chrome100 · 27/10/2015 12:47

Bit weird. You wouldn't have a party on a Monday evening as an adult never mind a child. It's just not a very festive time.

multivac · 27/10/2015 12:49

We generally have a tea party on the actual day - a couple of friends round after school for pizza and general mucking about, plus cake and candles - and a more full on celebration at the weekend. We like stretching birthdays

Notso · 27/10/2015 13:44

Loads of kids have weekday parties here. Monday, Wednesday and Thursday are particularly popular as two of the local play barn places are free on those days making for a cheap party.

BarbarianMum · 27/10/2015 14:07

My dc got quite a few midweek invites aged 4/5/6 - we made them when we could and although the logistics were more difficult lift sharing with other parents generally worked out. Now they're older it would be much more difficult due to evening activities and we probably wouldn't bother.

Emjones88 · 27/10/2015 14:43

The other thing is to offer to take any children of working families with you, home and then to the party. Parents pick up at end of party. That has been done for DS a couple of times when I have replied he wouldn't be able to attend due to us being at work until 5/5:30.
We're lucky it would seem re homework. One piece on a Friday so that's not an issue.

But as your child would like it on a weekend as one PP said maybe try it this year and decide for future reference. Weekends some parents stay to help out at that age too.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 27/10/2015 14:48

I think that a party at the weekend, and a family celebration on the day is the best way to go, newtothis - it's what we did for our three dses, and it worked fine - no-one felt left out or unhappy with the arrangement.

whois · 27/10/2015 14:49

Birthday tea and cake at home with the immediate family on the ACTUAL birthday.

Party on a weekend.

Those are he rules! :-)

OnlyAFoolsChance · 27/10/2015 14:51

My DD wanted a party in a really popular hall that most parents use, I couldnt get the Sat or Sun before her bday (which is a Monday) so have opted for the Friday 5pm - 7pm.

Wondering now if thats a really bad idea!

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 27/10/2015 15:25

I'd say Friday would be OK - everyone has the weekend to get over the party, and actually it leaves the weekend free, which is a good thing.

OnlyAFoolsChance · 27/10/2015 15:44

I would normally do a weekend SDTG...but it was a late booking so my own fault completely. She has a really large class, so if theres parents with other commitments and the kids cant go, its not really that big a deal I suppose :) I thought Friday evening would be better than a midweek - plus we have various clubs midweek too so I assumed a few of the invited kids would maybe have aswell.

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