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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

God-bothering at work

456 replies

WhereToSheNow · 25/10/2015 15:40

New MD hired his buddy/neighbour 6 months ago for a few hours a week to act as a Management Consultant.

The Management Consultant, who we call "Pokey" (because he keeps jabbing us in the arm) has some sort of official capacity within the Baptist Church, and his website is all about the application of his faith within business.

I didn't have a problem with that, as he hadn't mentioned religion.... until last week.

He attended a "World Leadership Course" and emailed us his notes, with several quotes about God and Jesus, telling us to read them and "feel free to ask any questions". In a meeting the following day, he asked us what we thought of his email.

I told him that I don't want to be included in emails that reference any religion/god, at which point he became very defensive.

Later that day I received another email where he said that he was sorry if the contents of his previous email had offended me, but that he hoped I would gain some insight that would assist me in my professional or personal life.

AIBU to think that my work should a) be a secular space and b) my personal life is none of his business!

OP posts:
SuburbanRhonda · 25/10/2015 21:32

I think you're right there, lorelei.

GardeniaBallpoint · 25/10/2015 21:46

except his finger in her shoulder which she should have nipped in the bud the first day; it's nothing to do with being well-mannered and everything to do with being assertive

So his bad behaviour is her fault? Like he's her naughty toddler or something?

HopefulAnxiety · 25/10/2015 21:55

Christian here and religion has no place in a secular workplace. I'd be very unhappy. I don't even discuss politics at work.

Flashbangandgone · 25/10/2015 21:56

lorelei9

Thank you for your comments... makes sense. I was being rather pedantic - sorry. Good point about the devil. I suppose it's because devil is quite often used as a straight-forward noun (e.g. he's a little devil) rather than a proper noun.

Atenco · 25/10/2015 22:34

Mmm, I hope you manage to put a stop to this behaviour, OP. As for converting people, I like religious people who can answer a straight question about their religion with a straight answer without going on and on. I like religious people who embody what is good in their religion. I hate people who think that the only part of their religion they have to practise to get into heaven is pestering other people to join them.

Original poster
WhereToSheNow · 26/10/2015 00:52

Ok, I will definitely tell him not to poke me next time it happens!

OP posts:
Fizzielove · 26/10/2015 00:56

How would he feel if you poked him back? Laugh and ask is this a new workplace game?? YANBU at all!

Fatmomma99 · 26/10/2015 00:56

I usually say "I'm with the other side"

Works for me!

When he pokes you, poke him back!!!!

GruntledOne · 26/10/2015 08:21

I can see that the super-sensitive and hugely intolerant OP would be the first to leave that workplace

What a very intolerant and unchristian thing to say, loveandhate. OP hasn't suggested that the man in question shouldn't be free to have his beliefs, all she is saying - which accords with the law of the country - is that he shouldn't try to impose them on people in the workplace. By no stretch of the imagination does that make her intolerant.

BertrandRussell · 26/10/2015 08:28

Gosh, LoveandHate- I've heard of "muscular Christianity" but this is something else!

chillycurtains · 26/10/2015 08:36

He is over stepping the mark a lot. However I don't understand this post as it sounds like the problem is resolved as he heard your complaint and apologised. Yes it wasn't the most gracious of apologises but if you don't get anymore emails then what is your issue ?

chillycurtains · 26/10/2015 08:38

I actually think I'd have more of a problem with the poking. That needs to stop.

StrangeLookingParasite · 26/10/2015 08:56

I think you're just another God-hating Mumsnetter to be honest

WTF?

I worked for six years in a company with two hard line Baptists directors (hell fire and damnation kinda thing). They thought nothing of expecting me to work all hours but had no understanding that I had to go home to shop, cook, iron, clean etc because their wives stayed at home and did all that for them. If I was gay and had a 'wife' that would have appalled them too! I left in the end. Neither of them were good people and one of them was so 'dubious' I am waiting for his name to appear in the papers one day........

RedCHeckedTableclothI also had a really hardcore Baptist boss at one stage. Funnily enough, he was also very selectively ethical, as well.
The loudest examples of their religions are usually the worst.

LoveAndHate · 26/10/2015 09:39

Suburb, I'm not a perfect Christian. Hope this helps.

Yes, I guess I am victim-blaming She's a bloody grown woman being poked and jabbed whenever her boss wishes to communicate or make a point. I can't think of an easier 'problem' to manage, to be honest Nope. She's just being feeble.

As I said yesterday, this thread was designed to bring out the atheist 'I don't believe in God with a small G but I'm apopbloodyPLEXIC that someone else does and wants to share his belief that I absolutely don't believe in that there is a God WITH A SMAAAAAAAAAALL G!!! intolerants.

AmonAmarth · 26/10/2015 09:40

Are you high?

GardeniaBallpoint · 26/10/2015 09:40

New MD hired his buddy/neighbour 6 months ago for a few hours a week to act as a Management Consultant.

Chillycurtains - I'd say THAT is the issue. Boss man has hired his mate to spread ideology in the workplace - an ideology which he presumably shares.

In this situation any member of staff who objects is vulnerable to being marked out as 'not one of us', and being directly or indirectly discriminated against.

GardeniaBallpoint · 26/10/2015 09:45

I can't think of an easier 'problem' to manage, to be honest Nope.

If you can't think of an easier problem to manage than telling your boss's mate to 'get off' then you must be fairly hard of thinking.

BoneyBackJefferson · 26/10/2015 09:46

LoveAndHate

There is a time and a place to share your beliefs, it is not at work or through work emails.

It is definitely not when at work jabbing someone with your finger.

I absolutely don't believe in that there is a God WITH A SMAAAAAAAAAALL G!!! intolerants

Strangely, the most intolerant person on this thread appears to be you.

BertrandRussell · 26/10/2015 09:49

I always put God with a capital G.

Does that make me a tolerant atheist?

Lweji · 26/10/2015 09:50

I use both. Not sure what that makes me.Confused

saucony · 26/10/2015 09:59

I was raised Jewish, although my beliefs are more fluid these days, and I was always told to do this; G-d or g-d. Apparently you are not meant to write the full name on a piece of paper that may be thrown away. Of course, with the digital world, it became more confusing.

foragogo · 26/10/2015 10:09

what about religions that believe in multiple gods? they can't all be God surely?

I have a good friend who is a committed Christian and one of the things I really like about her is she isn't constantly trying to convert me or try and male me share her beliefs. Sadly, she's in the minority.

limitedperiodonly · 26/10/2015 10:56

I think she should be encouraged to turn the other cheek...

Original poster
WhereToSheNow · 26/10/2015 11:13

You're a charmer, aren't you LoveAndHate? I am not feeble, intolerant, god-hating or super-sensitive.
I wanted to know if I was being unreasonable, it appears I am not.

OP posts:
hairbrushbedhair · 26/10/2015 11:21

When I was a Christian I attended a bible study once where someone taught that god with a small g refers to idols or the devil (there's a scripture in the bible that calls him the god of the world, usually taken to mean the god of the heathen) and that God with a capital G is the Christian God because you start a persons name with a capital letter and the Christian God is who christians have a personal relationship with

They wouldn't have named Allah as God for instance but god because they don't believe Allah is 'God', but another entity or demonic power who deceives people away from the 'True God'

I would guess at a Muslim choosing to call Allah 'God' and not 'god' for the same (though Iv never met any Muslim IRL who doesn't think the Christian God is Allah, except for when christians say Jesus interchangeably with God)

I think the capital G versus lower g depends on who's writing it.

An atheist doesn't believe in any God personality existing but probably could accept that gods exist (in that there are things elevated by people to God status, despite believing they are imaginary themselves) but I don't think there's any possibility to cause offence to atheists by using either

Some christians get very upset at lower case g being used. Especially in the media. That's a conspiracy then! Grin