AIBU, the MIL iinvites us to dinner but gives us lunch

[Greensmiff]

We are having meat and rolls, my DH's favourite. But it's lunch not dinner, or is it just me?

It's the same thing to me!

Breakfast
Dinner
Tea

And if you're being wild then you can have 'supper' which is cereal before bed, but only as a treat or else it will lose its 'special occasion' feel

She serving him one of his favourite things - I think that's lovely.

My DP once mentioned he liked scotch eggs to his mother. Now when we to dinner she appears at the dining table with a silver tray and a pyramid of Scotch eggs. It's like ferrero rocher advert but a bit more disappointing.

I hate them and so do the children. DP makes a valiant effort but my dear FIL has them in his lunches for the next fortnight (she doesn't give a stuff about sell by dates).

Hah YES Bertrand.

Hearty guffaw at ferrero rocher style scotch eggs. Hurhurhur.

Maybe she's doing the rolls and meat as she knows your DH likes them.

To be honest, my MIL is a disgusting cook so I'd rather avoid it, broccoli steams for two hours (!) and all veggies are heavily salted. She said she was doing us fish, chips and beans for a change the other week - great I think until the chips were taken from the freezer and put in oven for about 5 mins and still cold in the middle.

YABU I think its the height of ingratitude to complain when she had good intentions and provided you with a meal even if it wasnt what you deem to be dinner. Its a bitchy comment if my sis in law speaks like that i set her right. Clearly you just dont like your mil its such a petty line of discussion.

So many questions!

Most importantly, I need to know what is meant by "meat and rolls". Is that a hot pork bap with gravy and/or apple sauce? A steak sandwich? A hot beef roll with horseradish? All of these could be described as "dinner".

A ham sandwich, or corned beef roll would be lunch or tea depending on the time of day served.

At home we say breakfast, lunch & tea. But dinner is also used in place of tea - usually when it's a "big dinner" - like Christmas day or in the context of saying to the DCs "no, you don't need an apple now, you're having a big dinner in a minute!" And, we'd never go out for tea. It would always be called dinner if we were going out. Unless it was lunch .

How anybody ever learns English as a second language is beyond me - we are so unnecessarily complicated!

I think it depends on the time of the meal.

I call my midday meal "dinner" and expect sandwiches, but if I were invited to someone's in the evening for "dinner" I'd assume they meant evening meal and expect something a little larger.

No such thing as lunch as its breakfast, dinner and tea

Yep

I'm always amused (and repelled) by being invited to 'kitchen supper', or even worse, 'kitchen sups,' implying that the meal is going to be somehow more informal and fun than dinner simply because it will take place ...in the kitchen. Strange how the only people who issue such an invitation have usually just spent squillions on a new kitchen and can't wait to show it off.

Breakfast
Lunch
(Kids' tea)
Supper
Dinner if restaurant/formal with friends

Where's the OP??? Eating the meat and rolls I'll bet! I do honestly wonder about the wisdom of complaining about such a trivial matter - but then that's me..........

breakfast
lunch - meal eaten at lunchtime!
tea - meal for small children served between 4 & 5 pm
dinner - what everyone else eats in the evening, hot or cold makes no difference.

"Meat and rolls" can you describe that a bit more?

Is it a hamwidge?

Mil drives me nuts with her "dinner" at lunch time.

Here we call it
breakfast, lunch, dinner - easy during term time because we all take a packed lunch to work/school so dinner is the main meal of the day.

weekends/christmas wehn I do the main meal in the middle of the day, thats dinner not lunch, and we would have tea in the evening.

to me it's about dinner being the main meal of the day, rather than a meal at a specific time. If I was invited for dinner, either at midday or evening, I would expect it to be a proper meal not meat and rolls.

I was also wondering that, NanaNina... Either there are a LOT of rolls, or she's back home slaving over a hot stove to make a hot evening meal she wasn't expecting to have to make!

Dinner is whichever is the hot meal here. In fact the DC sometimes ask if we are having "dinner at lunchtime or tea time."

Agree supper to me is a light snack often with warm drink shortly before bed. I know quite a lot of people that use the word supper when I think they mean their dinner or tea though.

Are high tea and afternoon tea the same thing?

On another note, I really fancy at hot pork roll with apple sauce now.

Apparently the idea of calling the midday meal 'dinner' originates from when coal miners would come back and need a big hot meal to keep them going. Something like that anyway. I'm surprised OP doesn't know her in laws well enough to know what she'll be getting. I worked out in the first month of starting to see DH that they call it dinner instead of lunch. They eat their big hot meal at 1pm every day and always have a sandwich in the evening. (Also they eat the same meal on Rota week in week out. Proper old school)

School dinners, dinner ladies, dinner time etc.
Packed lunch, lunch box, ladies who lunch.
You have a small meal between breakfast and your evening meal and you call it whatever is appropriate for you.

Oh FFS. I don't suppose the husband is whinging about his mother's gesture. She said the wrong word, big ruddy deal. Hang up your dinner suit and enjoy your Spam cob.

I wonder is OP still eating the meat and rolls, they must be massive.

High tea is a meal, like dinner, but for kids.

Afternoon tea is a cuppa and biscuits, cakes and sandwiches - preferably cucumber or tomato.

Cream tea is a cuppa, small sarnies, small cakes, and scones with clotted cream. You won't need supper

SantasLittle you are so right. When my DC were little they'd always have their evening meal around 5.30 or 6 and DH and I would eat much later. Whether it was dinner or tea for the DC depended entirely on what they were being served. Any hot cooked meal involving vegetables or gravy or something in a sauce was dinner but if it was a plate of sandwiches with fruit and yoghurt it was tea, or something on toast, even if it was served at the same time as dinner. I think the rules change depending on whether you are an adult or a child.

I said earlier that it's the time of day that determines whether it's lunch, dinner or tea but i've realised that I've contradicted myself slightly and that only applies to adults, not children. For children it is changeable, depending on the food served and the time of day.

For posh people the time of day rather than the type of food served dictates whether it's breakfast, lunch or dinner, except when it's high tea or supper, which depends on both the time of day and the food served and the location//formality of the meal and whether or not it involves guests/courses/candles.

Got that everyone? Good.

God it's hard work being British.