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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To actually like my MIL?

60 replies

NotAnotherMonday · 09/10/2015 21:17

She's brilliant!

Today my dp had a rare day off and as we're planning our wedding she offered to look after 3.5mnth old DD so we could do some shopping.

We picked her up four hours later and I can't believe how great she is.

  • the bottle she fed DD with has been washed so I only needed to put it in the steriliser when I got home
  • DD had her nap at her usual time this afternoon (give or take 5mins) and was a happy smiley baby when I picked her up, MIL sticks to a similar routine to what I do so DD isn't to unsettled.
  • DD went with a slight cold and came back cured (seriously, how does she do it?)

This is the second time she's looked after DD since she was born, and everytime I am shocked at how great she is with DD. She always listens to my rules about DD particularly about other people and even text to ask if she could take DD to her friends to see her and her baby for a few hours (we gave permission for this). She keeps her two large dogs away from DD.

Sorry to boast, I know not everyone has such amazing MILs but I'm so pleased I thought I'd boast a bit.

OP posts:
Bluecheese22 · 09/10/2015 21:22

I love mine too! She only has a son so likes doing girly things with me. I took her some flowers round out as a surprise as she'd had a horrible week and I loved how happy they made her. She text me later saying how special I was. We have a lovely relationship :-)

sproketmx · 09/10/2015 21:25

I love mine too. My ex Mil is a batty auld goat tho so I see both sides but my Mil is great. Never treats any of my kids with different dad's and different to mine with her son. (And she brings me strawberry tarts from the bakers she works in if they're about to get chucked)

tibbawyrots · 09/10/2015 21:25

Mine was lovely too. Sadly no longer with us and I only knew her for 4 years but she was fab and I miss her so much.

threenotfour · 09/10/2015 21:27

That's brilliant. I would recommend telling how much you appreciate her sticking to the routine you have and how much you appreciated being asked by text about taking your dd out. It will make your relationship stronger and encourage her to continue doing all these things.

Original poster
NotAnotherMonday · 09/10/2015 21:27

Tibbawyrots Flowers

Its great you have memories of her though

OP posts:
LadyLuck81 · 09/10/2015 21:28

Mine's awesome too. I'd be as equally happy if she lived near us as I would my mum.

tibbawyrots · 09/10/2015 21:29

Thank you monday she was a lovely lady. :)

fulldutypaid · 09/10/2015 21:30

I also adored mine. I loved her more than her son in the end :) Her son and I parted but we remained very close until her death.

blondiep14 · 09/10/2015 21:32

I love mine too. My kids adore her and we're lucky to have her.
I hope to follow her example when my sons have partners.

Original poster
NotAnotherMonday · 09/10/2015 21:34

fulldutypaid Flowers for you too

blondiep14 I too hope to be a good MIL when the time comes for DD and any future DC.

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 09/10/2015 21:36

I loved my MIL. She died when DD was a baby and both DH and I agree that had she lived, we would have had more children. Because she was a wonderful Granny.

MustBeLoopy390 · 09/10/2015 21:40

Yanbu, for the past 7 years my MIL has been my mam in everything but biology. My MIL has : took me and my eldest child in, supported me through going nc with my family, supported me and do through a very difficult labour, took me wedding dress shopping, helped me pick my dream dress (she knows me so bloody well), helped organise the wedding, moved us back to her home when we had no heating and were at rock bottom, supported me when my biological sister passed away, supported me and dh during another difficult labour including when I was 20 mins off having ds2 and she was the one ringing the ward and rubbing my back while dh fannied on with bag (extremely entertaining now!) and is currently helping me scheme, plot and plan regarding dh's birthday Grin all of which my biological mother has been either absent, demeaning (I apparently looked 'a right cunt' in my dress), or just blatantly ignorant. People say blood is thicker than water but I disagree sometimes

DickDewy · 09/10/2015 21:41

I love mine too.

She helps, but never interferes. She's devoted, but puts herself first and I admire her hugely for it - she has done her bit.

Original poster
NotAnotherMonday · 09/10/2015 21:43

It's great we all have such supportive, helpful, non-interferring MILs.

I see so many threads here about bad MILs, I count myself lucky.

OP posts:
y0rkier0se · 09/10/2015 21:48

I also adore my MIL. She has made me feel one of the family since day 1.

Junosmum · 09/10/2015 22:15

Mines great too!

redexpat · 09/10/2015 22:50

I rang mine at 8am. At 845 she was here and took ds to nursery for me. Had had a bad night with dd and couldnt see straight for sleep deprivation.

Welshmaenad · 09/10/2015 22:55

Sadly mine is awful, and it makes me sad not to have that relationship, particularly as I lost my own mum last year.

BUT my ex boyfriend's mum (ex and I are still great friends) is bloody amazing, I'm so lucky she and his dad are still in my life, she adores my kids (no gkids of her own) and they call them auntie and uncle, she's always offering to help with childcare etc when I'm in a jam and I just love spending time with them. Fortunately DH is quite happy that our family and ex's family are close and gets on well with them too. It's all very lovely.

KatieLatie · 09/10/2015 23:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

KatieLatie · 09/10/2015 23:08

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Finallyonboard · 09/10/2015 23:14

Mine is the best! I love her.

TheCatsMother99 · 09/10/2015 23:18

My MIL is a seriously interfering so and so but I love the bones of her and still feel lucky to have her.

ForChina · 09/10/2015 23:24

Mine is one of my best friends. Love her to bits and feel blessed to have her in my life.

Ohfourfoxache · 10/10/2015 02:42

I'm really, really jealous Sad

Never underestimate how lucky you are - although by the sounds of it you already know this Thanks

DulcetMoans · 10/10/2015 03:36

Mine is pretty awesome too. Don't get me wrong, she is an panic sack and can be a little interfering - we've had our fall outs but I know I am extremely lucky as she would do anything for any of her kids and she has always made me feel like I'm included in that. I speak to her everyday and now we have had a DS we have a new level to our relationship.

My FIL is great too! Makes up for my own family which is a bit if a mess!