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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Shared Facebook accounts

72 replies

ScribblerOnTheRoof · 09/10/2015 17:03

I don't get it.

Couples who have one profile and share it.

To me this shows that one doesn't trust the other.

Maybe I want to Facebook my friend without her DP reading the messages too. I know I can text and this isn't an issue. I just.dont.get.it

OP posts:
ChwatFeechers · 09/10/2015 18:40

For the insecure, surely.

YANAgurl1973 · 09/10/2015 19:45

My brother and did in law share the same fb account and email. I know there's definitely trust issues because in an email to my brother many years ago,I mentioned that my husband was working abroad and he piped up with "oh are you sure you can trust him?". Very odd

ProcrastinatorGeneral · 09/10/2015 20:05

If I see a shared account I usually wonder which one cheated.

sproketmx · 09/10/2015 20:40

Or they're not arsed about having their own one? My Mil and fil have a shared one because he's a lazy bastard and would never reply otherwise

NecklessMumster · 09/10/2015 20:46

I don't want a fb account but I do go on my dps account, he's given me access and it means I can see pics of my nieces /nephews

MotherOfFlagons · 09/10/2015 21:11

I don't know anyone with a shared FB account. I think it's weird.

celtictoast · 09/10/2015 21:17

Most houses just have one letterbox.

madcapped · 09/10/2015 21:18

Each of dsis cats have a fb account. It's only so she can play those Farmville type games without bothering her friends. I think it's quite sensible really. ??

DanglyEarrings · 09/10/2015 21:19

Most houses just have one letterbox but they have individually addressed letters which are legally regarded as 'private' for the addressee only!

celtictoast · 09/10/2015 21:21

It's just Facebook. If people are happy to share an account that's up to them. Why should it bother anyone else? Personal messages are what email is for.

Robotgirl · 09/10/2015 21:26

I think Facebook is peculiar. I used to be on it. I'm glad I'm not now. Some people live their lives through it. If couples want to have a 'shared account' then who cares. Whatever happened to communicating by phone & in person, if you only want to be communicating with one of them, not both.

Pranmasghost · 09/10/2015 21:58

My dh doesn't want a Facebook account though he occasionally looks at mine. When we first got email many years ago I used his name hoping to encourage home to use it. He never did and the account still gets most of my emails though I now have another in my name.
If anyone sends an email to him he insists I read it to him and he will dictate a brief response. He is nearly 80 and uses a tablet to play solitaire and look at BBC news. He will also look on eBay for obscure model railway stuff which he shows me and I get it.
Neither of us would ever cheat and we don't have secrets. He knows my nn on here and likes an occasional look at AIBU. He loved the penis beaker thread.

MotherOfFlagons · 09/10/2015 22:05

I Facebook though largely to keep in touch with several circles of friends who live in far flung places. DH does not Facebook at all and hates the idea of it. I keep my privacy settings very tight, don't post pictures of my dinner and don't share motivational posts though so perhaps not a typical user.

Usually I can't think of anything interesting to post on FB (or Twitter for that matter).

Indigomontoya · 09/10/2015 23:40

DH and I have a joint account. I'm the one who posts more and he's the one who is just nosy!
I had an account first and then DH got more interested in FB but couldn't be arsed to set up/maintain an account.
If I want to talk to my friends/family about private stuff then I speak to them or text.
It's honestly not sinister.

HearTheThunderRoar · 10/10/2015 02:44

My bother and his wife have a shared account, both barely upload anything other than a change of profile picture of both of them every now and again. It was originally my SIL's but they only use it to keep in touch and see photos of their 3 children abroad so my brother uses it as well.

I don't see the issue, maybe if they were both prolific users and uploaded a lot of things then yes.

yankeecandle4 · 10/10/2015 10:11

I only know one person with a joint account and AFAIK he doesn't even look at it. They aren't married (to her disdain) and I think it is her way of making them more official to the public.

A relative has three pets and they all have a FB account. Regular statuses posted in the first person to the "Mummy" (ie my relative)

eg picture of dog saying "I love my Mummy". "Please come to my birthday party on X day"

When relative goes on holiday she books pets into kennels/cattery that have webcams and the pets give daily statuses (and pictures) on how much they are missing "Mummy", "What pressie will Mummy bring me back from hollibobs?"

I really don't know how/why she can be bothered!

GladysTheGolem · 10/10/2015 10:17

There's a couple who post lot on the local selling pages 'BobandSue Jones', it's usually Sue doing the posts and she gets really annoyed when people address her as Bob Confused If only there was a way to solve that.

Hurr1cane · 10/10/2015 10:22

Haha DP wants Facebook to check things but he doesn't want his own account because he can't work it out properly. He's a right caveman. I've often been tempted to just add his name to mine to save the hassle. But I know people think it's odd so I haven't. I'm going to have to make him his own and teach him how to use it. It's going to be a fucking ball ache.

ForFlipSakes · 10/10/2015 11:43

My main question about a combined Facebook page is: whose birthday is it when it says "Today is BobandSueJones' birthday". That one stumps me every time...

KingJoffreyLikesJaffaCakes · 10/10/2015 15:13

Meh.

No different to sharing bank accounts...

I don't share either, btw. Totally my own person. But if couples do need to sgare everything then I guess whatever works for them.

Lweji · 10/10/2015 15:17

It's different from bank accounts.

If I post on a shared account, I never know if I'll get one or the other.

I don't think we should relate to couples as a single unit.

And people shouldn't lose their own identity because they are in a couple.

For example, they may want to share different things, have different political opinions and even discuss their own marital issues with other people. Why not?

alphabettyspaghetty · 10/10/2015 15:21

I've got a friend who has a shared account with her husband but husband is a famous rugby player and he doesn't want the hassle of social media but wants to remain in touch with family while out of their home country.

LookAtAllThesePhucksIGive · 10/10/2015 15:45

I became friendly with one of the mums at school and she's a nice person but she shares an fb account with her dh. I blocked it because of the racist comments that he was making and the Britain first posts he was sharing. She took the "funnies" with me and now doesn't really talk to me. A mutual friend whom we are both quite close to asked me what happened so I told her. I said I wasn't prepared to subject myself to such vile behaviour just to stay fb friends with her.

lifesalongsong · 10/10/2015 15:57

I don't know anyone with a shared account but I agree that it's weird.

Why does the famous rugby player need to have his name on the account, if all he wants to do is keep in touch surely he could just use his wife's password.

Once facebook get on top of all the non real name accounts name sharing will have to stop anyway

DoJo · 10/10/2015 19:03

For example, they may want to share different things, have different political opinions and even discuss their own marital issues with other people. Why not?

If they wanted to use Facebook in that way, then presumably they would get their own accounts.