naked in hotel rooms

[Crosbybeach]

Staying in a hotel last weekend basic but v clean. DH plonks his naked arse on the sofa. I said 'Eurgh' don't do that - you don't know who has been there, and, also, who wants your naked arse on their sofa?

It is yuk isn't it? He thought it was perfectly reasonable behaviour. He'd just had a shower.

I book myself a night in a hotel every six months. I'm pretty well naked from when I lock myself in the room at night until I get dressed to check out the next morning. It's not that I'm a nudist, but the chance to be able to walk around in the buff, take a bath, sleep nude is pretty exciting when you can't do it home.

Doing a Howard Hughs is appealing to me more and more these days cozie :)

Last hotel I stayed in had a private sauna. Suppose the steam and heat will have killed an nasty bugs and yes we shagged in there but not in the hot tub .

I always sleep naked. Always.

I don't know what it is with blokes but it seems they do enjoy stripping off at any given opportunity. Mine's the same.

In fact you've just reminded me of a time when myself and my OH were staying in a very nice hotel during a skiing holiday. It was around 6pm and the pair of us were sat propped up on top of the covers of our hotel room bed, contemplating what to do / where to eat that evening. We'd just returned from the spa and I was still in my dressing gown whilst he was stark bollock naked (as usual).

All of a sudden the door to our room flew open and the maid came crashing in, marching straight to one of the wall lights facing the end of our bed. Half way there she clocked the two of us sat dazed and confused, staring open mouthed at the intrusion and with my OH looking like a vulnerable hairy jelly baby. She was obviously so mortified (and tbf probably didn't speak english) that she pretended not to see us and continued to dramatically fiddle with this wall light, taking care not to glance behind her shoulder at her naked flabby audience. Hot on her heels she was joined within seconds by the maintenance man who also clearly decided that ignorance was the best course of action.

Between them they managed to change the bulb / repair the light in record time and exited the room as quickly as they'd entered, never glancing in our direction. Turning to my partner I realised that he'd silently and delicately managed to reach for a pillow and place it on top of his very exposed lap... the look of bemused innocence on his face made me burst out laughing. We never complained either, guess we thought the image of my partners pasty naked form was punishment enough.

snoozum

I think there may be something wrong with me..I never give this kind of thing a second though...

Who sang

Now I go cleaning windows To earn an honest bob
For a nosy parker It's an interesting job

Can anyone remember?

George Formby of course.

George Formby?

Cozie come on... Tell us some corkers!

I used to be a chambermaid. The average hotel room is not actually very clean, and the 'decorative' pillows and bedspreads (that get turned down when you have a turndown) are disgusting. We all kind of buy into the myth that no one's ever stayed in our room before, but working in housekeeping totally removes that illusion. The next guest obviously isn't aware that the last guest shat in the bath and wiped himself on the shower curtain... Obviously, replacement shower curtain, but how thorough would be cleaning your twentieth room of the day that you're not going to stay in?

Nonnainglese I am showing my age. Google him. Find him on Spotify. He was very funny. The ukelele man!

With my little stick of Blackpool Rock . . . I wonder what he meant by that?

Ive never thought about cleaning hotel room surfaces with wipes before this thread but its another thing Im going to have to add to the travel bag now.

I am always cautious about the kettle after a skanky mate told me of the larks he had by pissing in the kettle and setting it to boil before leaving the room. And I read about a chambermaid who 'cleaned' the cups by sluicing them under a tap and then drying with a used towel.

As a PP said I prefer to imagine no-one else ever stayed in the room before me so must must be pristine. I really dont want to think about the amount of bare arses that have plonked down on the bedspread.

Maybe I wont ever stay in a hotel again.

Not yuk to me.

Many of people have sat on my sofa, I have had sex with my partner on it many a time.

Not to mention hotel rooms, sofas, chairs, showers, floors...

If there is a horizontal or vertical place, someone will have shagged there or tried to.

And we're still (largely) on hotel bedrooms - don't get me started on the subject of what happens in hotel kitchens and restaurants!

Why cozietoesie are people planting naked bumhole kisses in the kitchen!

The amount of times Ive been called to a Hotel room to deliver extra towels/replace lightbulbs/carry luggage and these guests just wander round naked/half dressed/towel wrapped.

Grimmest are the 50+ yo men who wear a tshirt and yfronts. and thats it. Nothig against their age - its the outfit.

What exactly is wrong with it OP? Why is it disgusting?

Yeah I would be happy to plonk myself naked on a hotel sofa tbh. I also wander around naked in a hotel room if it's just me or me/dh.

I bet the amount of bodily fluids splashed around your average hotel room would make your eyes water. Probably best not to think about it really.

It depends on the Chef, mygrand - they usually set the tone of the place. (In between running around with cleavers and feeling up the waitresses in a desultory fashion.)

Did anyone watch the episode of Sex and the City where Charlotte's lawyer boyfriend moves in and sits butt naked on her sofa? She freaks out about the bum juice.

Has anyone else heard of bum juice? My DH doesn't believe there is such a thing.

The above reasons (and others) are exactly why we have FINALLY bought a caravan. New. No other people's bodily fluids. Hopefully.

I can't understand any of this squeamishness. Naked people! Clean naked people sitting on things! Unless you're going around licking the sofa, what's the problem?