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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to stay in a 1 bed flat until baby is 16 months old?

92 replies

lilyb84 · 01/10/2015 22:07

DC1 due in January. Lease comes up in May. We have 1 bedroom with room for a cot. We do have a large lounge but it's essentially our 2 cats' bedroom (we close them in at night so we can get some sleep!) so we wouldn't be able to use it as a second bedroom for us or baby.

We both love this flat - probably the most I've loved somewhere I've lived since childhood. But it's small, with barely any storage space, and no leeway for DH - or me - catching up on rest in a spare room which having spoken to a couple of people who've attempted to bring up a baby in a one bed flat seems to be what they end up doing (one couple I know have basically moved into their lounge so the bedroom is now baby's room).

We live in a fairly nice part of South London and love the area - DH's job is very local and it wouldn't make sense if he had to pay to commute as the salary isn't very high, but it's unlikely we'd find somewhere else in the immediate area for similar rent but with an extra bedroom - we'd have to move further out.

What I'm asking really is - is it practical to stay here for another year when our lease comes up for renewal, or would it just be too much having the baby in our room for nearly a year and a half? Would we be missing the chance to get DC into good sleeping habits by being able to put him down in his own room from 6/7 months onwards? Any of you out there who've managed in a 1 bed for longer than a year?

this all may be made moot by our landlord deciding to put up the rent or deciding he doesn't want a baby in the flat but I'm ignoring both possibilities for now

OP posts:
Crazypetlady · 02/10/2015 12:30

Sounds fine O.p. I had four cats when ds was born he is four months now and they rarely bother with him. Can't understand the rehoming mindest.

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 13:26

Londonista it's certainly an idea but we wouldn't be able to fit living room furniture into the bedroom (there's a huge unmoveable wardrobe in the latter plus the room is an uneven shape) unfortunately.

OP posts:
GinandJag · 02/10/2015 13:32

The longer you stay in your current place, the less likely you are to move to an interim place, so your next move can be to somewhere you can stay for a very long time.

Don't worry about the cats.

hairbrushbedhair · 02/10/2015 13:43

DS is 3 tbh I think the only purpose his own bedroom serves is storage for toys and the bed I hope he'll want to sleep in for even just one bloody night straight through

We were actually in a 1 bed before and it was fine I just stuck his cot in living room so if me and DH needed our own space we could have it

hairbrushbedhair · 02/10/2015 13:52

Meant to clarify his travel cot in living room his big cot was in our bedroom and fortunately he'd sleep in both when a baby. He began co sleeping by climbing into my bed when he was 2

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 02/10/2015 14:08

I know a family with the 10 YEAR old still sharing his parents room. Due to space issues...

Look at some drawers to go under baby's cot to store their clothes/nappies.

NickyEds · 02/10/2015 14:09

We were kind the other way round to you in that we had 2 good sized bedrooms but a small living room and tiny kitchen (just area under the stairs). It's easier your way I think! all you really need to do in a bedroom is sleep. If the area is nice and you love it I'd stay for now.
You just fill whatever space you have.... but we moved from the 2 bed back to back terrace to a 4 bed, large kitchen, living room and play room house when ds was 17 months and I was 7 months pregnant and it's great having more space for ds to play and room to house the stuff we need/want. I'd plan to move at 16 monthsthough. I know new babies don't need much in theory but no one I know just has a sling and a change mat! The toys.....all of the toys

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 14:10

So much useful advice and positive experiences, thank you all!

WhyCant I'm already looking into under-cot storage options and being a bit of a tidy freak am excited about finding solutions for the space we do have Smile

OP posts:
NickyEds · 02/10/2015 14:17

If you're looking at buggies, with some of them the new born carrycot is suitable for night time sleep so you wouldn't need to bother with a moses basket.
Baby baths are useful but not really necessary.
I know people who kept the buggy permanently in the car.
Posh bouncy chairs fold totally flat to slide under the sofa when not in use.
My Caboo sling is its own bag (it sort of folds into itself).
Jumparoos are massive but I loved mine-for older babies!
Don't buy a thousand blankets like I did, just use grobags.

Defenderwife · 02/10/2015 14:24

You need to think about the pram, clothes, changing area, bouncer chair etc. Do you have room for it all ?

I think yabu to have cats in a one bed flat.

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 14:32

Defender yes I think have room for all the 'stuff'. It's more the sleeping arrangements I was worried about.

Our cats are very happy and the space they have is relatively very big with plenty of room for them to play, explore and hide if needs be. But I don't really want to debate the ethics/pros/cons of indoor cats and space as I've seen some pretty heated threads on here on that subject Smile

OP posts:
hairbrushbedhair · 02/10/2015 14:37

I just zoned the rooms we did have also

A bit like ikea

TheBunnyOfDoom · 02/10/2015 14:44

This is interesting - we're going to TTC next year and we also live in a one-bed with two cats! Our plan was to stay here for a while as well, mostly because we pay cheap rent so it gives us a chance to save, but also we're in a great location with regards to work/shops.

Glad most people think it's doable - congrats, OP!

NickyEds · 02/10/2015 14:46

I'm not sure the cats will be an issue necessarily. Obviously they'll have to be locked away from the baby whilst s/he's sleeping and the baby kept away from them (and their food and litter tray)when they are crawling but surely loads of people have cats and babies???

Artandco · 02/10/2015 14:58

Defender - we didn't buy all that ' stuff' so didn't need to store it. Babies just need a few babygrows not hundred of clothes, a change area for us was a towel on bed/ floor, the laid on floor on a soft blanket rather than bouncey chairs.
We did have a pram but used a sling most so could have done without. They co slept for ages.

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 15:03

I'm pretty sure our cats won't be an issue, although I know you can never predict how pets will react to a new human being! I'm planning on getting a net to go over the cot / moses basket, never leaving the sleeping baby in a room the cats can get into unsupervised, and of course once baby's crawling our whole flat - cat things included - will need child-proofing anyway so we'll cross that bridge when we come to it.

I know plenty of people with cats and babies, difference being they had more space / outdoor cats - the only reason I mentioned ours was from a practical point of view as it explains why using our lounge as a second bedroom is tricky (although not impossible).

OP posts:
sleepyhead · 02/10/2015 15:24

Erm, we may have stayed in a 1 bed flat until the baby was at school and had a baby sibling Blush.

Yes, things are more comfortable now we have a 3 bed, but it was fine, more than fine. You get by with what you're used to.

Certainly up to age 2 it would be very easy. Once you have to start thinking about a bed rather than a cot then obviously room size is an issue (we had very big rooms, just not many of them).

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 02/10/2015 15:24

We managed fine with a baby in a 1 bed. For a while we had 2 DC in a one bed and survived. Even though we are now in a house with spare bedrooms the DC still share.

I had a basic plastic storage unit with drawers for nappies, wipes and other baby paraphanalia. Even though the kitchen was too small for us to eat in I did have the high chair in there in the early days after weaning as the floor was easier to clean.
You need somewhere to put toys in the evening such as some big plastic tubs so you can reclaim some adult space and avoid the agony of stepping on random bits of plastic.
When we moved somewhere larger we took a while to adjust to the space.

Katie2001 · 02/10/2015 15:31

Two adults, two teenage children, 3 cats and 5 caged rats used to live in my one bed flat. No idea how, but they coped (had lots of big wardrobes though).

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 15:33

Bloody hell katie! Hats off to you all.

OP posts:
PurpleHairAndPearls · 02/10/2015 15:39

Totally do-able.

We had a tiny bedsit studio flat when our first DC was born. Babies are tiny and easily accommodated. The only thing that helped was we also had a car so kept the pushchair in the boot Smile (Maybe a sofa bed and earplugs would be good for your lounge?)

Even now we have moved many times, we will always have more DC than bedrooms Grin and it's absolutely fine. Good storage is absolutely key. A local IKEA is very useful as they have mock ups of small houses/flats being used for families and lots of brilliant ideas.

I love cosiness. DH and I are planning a move to a bedsit/houseboat/cave as soon as the DC have left home!

Congratulations!

Katie2001 · 02/10/2015 15:42

Oh no, Lily, before I lived there - I bought it from them. I couldn't do that in a million years!

Original poster
lilyb84 · 02/10/2015 16:29

Oh, haha, I see. I was a little bit in awe of you there...

OP posts:
TheWatchersCouncil · 02/10/2015 16:38

We were in a 1 bed until DD was over 3. Fortunately, she has always been a good sleeper, so sharing a bedroom with her was fine. What was harder was the lack of space overall and the main room having so many uses at the same time - living room, dining room, play room, my office.

I don't think you should re-purpose your lounge as a 2nd bedroom. It was suggested that we did that. But then where would we have eaten, watched TV, where would I have worked, where would DD have played?

TheWatchersCouncil · 02/10/2015 16:38

Oh and we had 1 cat too!

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