to think having a dog is not the same as having a baby.

[Allyoucaneat]

I have a 12month old who is a crappy sleeper, on a good night he wakes 3 or 4 times but most nights it's more like 6-8 times.

My dp does is fair share but I'm still utterly exhausted. I leave for work at 7am, so I get up at 6am, although one of is usually aready up with with ds2 who wakes around 5am.

My colleague has just got a new dog, 5yr old rescue dog.

At work today was having a lighthearted moan about not getting enough sleep. She replied 'I know how you feel since we got the dog I have to get up an hour earlier than I used to, to walk him, I need to get up at 7:30am now.'

Aibu to think getting up to walk your dog is not the same as getting up with a child six times a night then starting the day at 6am!? It's just not on the same level, it's not a puppy needing training or anything.

[catfordbetty]

Could you swap? That would show her!

[JeffsanArsehole]

Also got a howly geriatric cat and before he died a dog who shit himself at the end when he fell asleep

Kids were easier (though more expensive)

[Trinpy]

I dunno, I regularly compare my 1 year old to a labrador - needs a good run round the park every day, will go with anyone who offers him food, can't really take him into shops and restaurants. I could go on.

It's just something to say, isn't it? No need to get upset over it.

[captaincake]

I think she was trying to contribute to the conversation and have empathy with you. But YANBU to say that it's not the same. When DH's brother met DS he said to his dog something along the lines of "this is your new cousin now Grandma has got two grandchildren"

[duchesse]

Of course having a dog isn't the same as having a baby. You wouldn't shut your baby in a crate overnight or take it out to poo on the grass. You don't have to interact with a dog when you're too tired to think straight. Anybody who claims their dog is like a baby is a complete loon.

On the other hand, you might be reading too much into a passing remark of your colleague's (possibly due to extreme tiredness!??).

[SeasonalVag]

She's just trying to empathise, lighten up!

[echt]

OP, you don't have a dog, so you don't know to what extent it is like having a baby.
You don't say whether your colleague has/had a child. If they have, they know what they're on about, so you need to back off. If they haven't they don't.

[TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams]

Offer to call her every time your child wakes in the night?

She's trying to empathise, though badly in the way that most of us did prior to the unimaginable horror of chronic sleep deprivation .

So yabu but on that much sleep, yabnu to be yabu about everything.

[Bubblesinthesummer]

I don't have a baby, but I am constantly sleep deprived through illness/disability and no let up.

Having a baby isn't the only reason as to why people lose sleep.

As pp said, it isn't a competition.

[waxweasel]

I agree with you OP!! YANBU I also have a non sleeping toddler (2.5yo...sorry, you might have a while to go...) and a piss annoying friend from uni who bangs on and on about how her dog is just like having a baby. I purposefully dont discuss DD mych with her as she doesnt much like kids and is clueless, but I still get 'oh having Ddog is so much work, it's exactly like having a baby...'. Apparently even down to teething!

Yes exactly the same. Except she and DP are constantly on exciting dog free holidays. Oh and she tells me all this while she and her DP are happily sat drinking cocktails with me, while Ddog is at home. While DH wrestles DD into baths/bed. But they are just the same, y'know.

Fuckwits. DH and I have now made an in joke of it and regularly come up with ludicrous 'having DD is just like having a dog because....' pronouncements in her voice

[MrsGentlyBenevolent]

wax, with all due respect, you need to get over yourself a little bit. No, it is not exactly the same, but as others pointed out, your life choices are different, but not un-comparable. You chose to have a child, your friend a dog - both need looking after for a number of years. You knew that child-free holidays were not going to happen for a while, so I don't understand your resentment on that one. I find the last bit of your post actually quite rude, taking the piss out of your friend like that and calling them 'fuckwits'? I wouldn't want to be friends with someone that comes over so smug in their life choices that they would resort to calling names on their friends who are just trying to make conversation.....

[MyrtleMoaning]

Wait until your DC is a toddler, then you'll get the comparison

[Shutthatdoor]

Fuckwits. DH and I have now made an in joke of it and regularly come up with ludicrous 'having DD is just like having a dog because....' pronouncements in her voice

Well with friends like you, who need enemies

[LikeASoulWithoutAMind]

Look on the bright side - at least your child will grow out of it. The dog will never be able to walk himself

[MinesAPintOfTea]

Well done for accepting that so gracefully. Hope you get a decent night soon!

[kennyp]

sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me

so what if i throw a dictionary at your head?

which is irrelevant, but i don't think she was trying to be mean to be honest. tell her that your baby has been barking all night and refuses to go on a lead.

hope you get some decent sleep soon.

[Audweb81]

I think they must be worse as they never grow up to be independent and able to look after their own poo. I have a few colleagues who have had puppies recently and they sound exhausting, as I say that as someone who had very little sleep with my daughter for a long time.

[JoeMommuh]

Your colleague was trying to be friendly and empathise.

[Focusfocus]

Okay, I am very heavily pregnant at the moment and expecting our baby in the next couple weeks. I am also struggling enormously with sleep for the past 6 months or so with various pelvic issues which wake me up at 1.45 am and thats it. I am staring into the abyss of baby generated sleeplessness as I write!

I am also the mum of a dog - she is 1 year old - and much like our expected autumn baby this year - she came as a puppy exactly this time last year.

DH and I moved overnight from rosey eyed freshly honeymooned newly married couple to - people who -

(1) Were waking every hour every night to the wails of the puppy with work to go to next day
(2) Familiarising ourselves with the texture and contents of various forms of poo
(3) cleaning massive diarrhea off the house and the garden at 3 am and dragging a 9 week old puppy to the emergency vet - feeling not inconvenienced but truly petrified.
(4) spending the next one year yelling NO STOP LEAVE STAY repeatedly unendingly till right now.
(5) Loving her immeasureably - despite being at hair tearing points repeatedly.
(6) Loving her enormously and loving our kickey bump and waiting to introduce them.

Look - childless/free people would need to say something to those having a well deserved moan about their babies. If the only permissible response is "Oh thats really hard" - and nothing else, the world would be a shit place.

Lots of our puppy work has prepared us for what is to come. Doesnt mean its the same. nobody thinks the same, but I totally entirely understand the role pets can play in people's lives - i say that as someone who is about pop any moment.

I wish though people wouldnt say these things to pet-free people. They would never get it and end up concluding the person with the pet is being stupid, clueless or socially inappropriate.

I cant wait to be a mum despite whats about to happen to my bits and boobs. But a part of me already is a mum. And a part of DH already is a Dad. But this is something we never, ever, ever mention to non-pet people. Ever. Because, ya know - how can you?!

[hedgehogsdontbite]

No they're not the same. DS used to wake lots during the night but he's growing up and now sleeps through more often than not, although wakes up at 5.00am still.

The late LittleBastardDog slept with one ear open waiting for any sign of hedgehogs in the garden to trigger pandemonium. Any sign would do. Car going past, clear evidence of a hedgehog. DH coughing, obviously a hedgehog. He ripped the curtains down in a frenzy when he actually saw a hedgehog in the garden. No growing out of it. 14 years of hedgehog paranoia and mayhem. Thank god we had no neighbours.

[schokolade]

In the midst of sleep deprivation here too. Reasonable or not I'd have laughed in her face. Yes there are many reasons fir sleep deprivation. But a full nights sleep and being woken at 7.30 isn't sleep deprivation...

[RolyPolierThanThou]

I would have so much fun with this.

I'd have serious-faced conversations about how you had to get up in the night last night to let your dc have a wee but you've now trained him to wee on a bit of newspaper.

And that you'll be going on holiday this weekend and have found a local kennels that also accepts children.

Then complain that your son has just started teething and instead of chewing the rawhide bone, he's been chewing the skirting boards.

[formerbabe]

I am also the mum of a dog

Of course you are

[Shutthatdoor]

Having a dog isn't like having a baby, but it is ridiculous to think that you can't be seriously sleep deprived unless you have DC is ridiculous.

[RolyPolierThanThou]

Focusfocus
The world is not made up if pet people and no pet parents.

I have had two puppies and I've had to care for an abandoned (non-weaned, so syringe-fed) kitten. I've also had children (3 of them). I can assure you times about a million that the two are in NO WAY comparable.