to think having a dog is not the same as having a baby.

[Allyoucaneat]

I have a 12month old who is a crappy sleeper, on a good night he wakes 3 or 4 times but most nights it's more like 6-8 times.

My dp does is fair share but I'm still utterly exhausted. I leave for work at 7am, so I get up at 6am, although one of is usually aready up with with ds2 who wakes around 5am.

My colleague has just got a new dog, 5yr old rescue dog.

At work today was having a lighthearted moan about not getting enough sleep. She replied 'I know how you feel since we got the dog I have to get up an hour earlier than I used to, to walk him, I need to get up at 7:30am now.'

Aibu to think getting up to walk your dog is not the same as getting up with a child six times a night then starting the day at 6am!? It's just not on the same level, it's not a puppy needing training or anything.

[Senpai]

I've had a high maintenance dog that was more work than DD ever was.

Of course they're not the same thing. Even pet owners know they're not the same thing. That's the entire point of having a pet and not a child!

Even with the hardest dog the relationship will always be emotionally one sided and on your terms. When you want to show love or shoo it away, when you want space when you don't. A child, not so much.

But that said, you're taking a silly remark too seriously. She's just trying to relate to your sleep deprivation. I wouldn't look so deep into it.

[BrandNewAndImproved]

I think dogs are harder then children.

My dms dog wakes her at least once every night to be let out for a wee.

It's easier to go out and go on holiday with dcs then dogs.

[cashewnutty]

My children were fab sleepers. My dog, as a pup, was a total nightmare at night. She had us all up on rotation for a long time. I have posted a picture as proof. DD2 asleep early morning (in summer) with pup.

[Pasithea]

I got my second rescue dog at weekend. I'm knackered. At least you can put nappies on babies. She's 3 and an ex breeder so is just being trained and getting used to the world outside a cage.


Daughter in law with three under 5 s. Said how do you cope. Lol.

[steff13]

It sounds like the co-worker's dog is older, but I'd take a newborn baby over a puppy any day of the week. Puppies are such hard work.

[Focusfocus]

Nobody has said they are comparable. They are truly, utterly, incomparable. There was no need for the face pulling. But if that gives you pleasure why not!

On the meantime, OP I hope you can identify light chitchat and general conversation. A couple weeks later I might not of course. But that can make a different thread!

[Notoedike]

I have compared having my pup to the time when my twins were babies. Obviously not the same but some of the feelings were surprisingly similar. People cope with challenging situations in different ways, hope you get a good night's sleep soon.

[Allyoucaneat]

Thanks all. I'm happy to accept iabu, but she's not up several times a night with the dog (I get that some people are with their own dogs).

I also had a dog until recently and this is dc2 so also get that there is an end to it and he will become more independent.

It's not a competition but it just seemed like an insensitive comparison to me. Maybe I should have said I wasn't talking directly to her at the time I was chatting to another colleague and she joined in.

[Welshwabbit]

www.mommyish.com/2014/12/04/stfu-parents-who-insist-dogs-are-not-children/

Sleep deprivation is rotten, OP, but she's just trying to join in the conversation.

[CatEyeFlick]

yanbu, literally do not know where to start with this, it cringes every bone in my body when people with dogs (and no kids) compare owning a dog to being a parent. no. just no. I just smile and nod as there is no telling them

[Notoedike]

It wasn't the sleepless nights that made me compare my experience with twin babies and my pup - both slept quite well...it was the seemingly never ending attention they required during their awake times. But yes it does end much quicker.

[steff13]

My dog had some sleepless nights for a couple of months when she was a puppy, but it's the constant attention that was exhausting. The running around, the gnawing on the furniture, peeing on the floor, etc. If you let them out of your sight for one second they're into something they shouldn't be. Babies are contained. They rarely chew your table legs. :)

[NotMeNotYouNotAnyone]

I regularly have to stop joining in on baby talk by sharing about my dog. I havs to remind myself there's people like OP to get offended.

Don't get into competitive tiredness, it's just boring and serves no purpose except to prove you're the most miserable. It's been a year, your colleagues don't care about your baby any more than you care about their dog or dp or whatever else they go on about.

[ScarletRuby]

Yes you win, your life is more miserable AND you're more important because you chose to procreate. Well done.

[Onthepigsback]

It's not a competition but for the record my new pup was so much harder than my new baby. Her situation is not really comparable to yours. I'm sure she didn't mean to make you feel it was, she was probably just talking about what was front of mind for her at the time.

[FilbertSnood]

You see the problem with sleep deprivation is that you are so tired you don't EVER want to hear about anyone else's tiredness. You just want a bit of sympathy, recognition and then a sleep.

I could have cheerfully disposed of a colleague who used to bang on about her lack of sleep due to her baby (not getting at you OP) and if I ever tried to join in the conversation and say that I was also tired because of my dog / late night / busy week she totally shut me down with a "you don't know tiredness until you have children" I began to loathe her (again - I know this isn't you!).

Fast forward to now. I have two DC, one was a bit of a shit sleeper, but did eventually sleep through at about 17 months. The second... omfg. He is nearly 3 years old and still regularly wakes all night every hour or two hours.

However, I do try to remember that everyone is allowed to be tired / feel tired, even if they don't have the night waking I do. Fucking hard tho!

[Permanentlyexhausted]

I consider my dog to be like my third child (or, in fact, my first child since the dog is the eldest). The difference with the dog is that she will never get less dependent on me. After 13 years of dog ownership and 12 years of parenthood, this is becoming more and more obvious. She's a much bigger tie. Obviously the children just come with us if we go out for the day or away for the weekend or on holiday but we have to make special arrangements for the dog.

You can't win a game of competitive tiredness. Finding out that your life is much harder than everyone else's won't make you feel good about yourself.

[Permanentlyexhausted]

But if we're going for competitive tiredness, I have a 9 year old who still wakes me up almost every night!!!

[pandarific]

Do you talk about your child a lot, OP? Sometimes colleagues monopolise the conversation about their DC and it can be wearing...

[spamm]

OK - I only have one child, who is now 10 years old, and I have always said he is a very easy child, so I am under no illusion that it could have been very different.

But I cannot remember being so tired and frustrated with him, as I have been with our now 10-month old puppy.

[QueenOfTheAlley]

Yes babies are different to dogs

Babies grow up but dogs are always going to be dogs.

[Thebirdsneedseeds]

My mum bought a puppy when I had DS.

The dog weaned as DS weaned. The dog needed spoon fed to ensure it was getting wet food and dry biscuit in every mouthful (just mix it in the bowl FFS!!)

The dog was teething as DS was teething.

The dog has bad nights when DS has bad nights.

The dog can be very disobedient when DS has tantrums.

The dog wakes early when my DS wakes early.

The dog needs cuddled and kissed when my son needs comfort.

It's all very . She openly admitted she needed something to nurture as she was so distressed that I had a baby and she didn't.

To some people a dog IS like a baby. Each to their own. It's not my place to judge what makes other people content.

[IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou]

but it just seemed like an insensitive comparison to me.

Really?? Insensitive? You need to get over yourself.

Maybe be a bit more professional and leave your home life there if no-one else is allowed to talk about theirs??