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Original poster

Did I deserve this mockery? really sick of having no support and nobody to talk to

48 replies

Seishan101 · 24/09/2015 18:19

I'll try and be brief.

Basically I've just found out I have a job interview for my dream job.

However, I only started my current job a few weeks ago.

I'm going for the interview of course but I'm torn between thinking it's wrong of me to ditch my current place of work after only a few weeks and doing what I know I'm more suited to.

So, speaking to DP just now I was telling him why it's such a difficult decision. More venting really because I suppose I'm stressed out and need to talk.

I said to him "part of me knows I won't like this current job as a long term thing anyway, only weeks in the hours are driving me mad (awkward shifts I meant, as he knew). He responded with a condescending shake of the head and a little giggle. This was me talking about a big deal to me and he's stood there fucking laughing at me. So naturally, I said "what you laughing at?". He replied "nothing, it's just that I work don't I." (still smirking).

I said "yeah, and??" so he replies "well, I'm used to working so naturally I have little sympathy for someone just starting out".

?????

I said "I'm not looking for sympathy, I'm just talking to you about my current feelings!" and he replied "yes but I've been working a long time, everything you're worried about is just normal life for me."

He does this all the time. Everything is a fucking competition. I can't be stressed as he's more stressed. I can't be tired as he's more tired. I can't have a difficult day as his is more difficult. There is no support - just a condescending smirk and a stupid comment. Sick of it.

OP posts:
TheWitTank · 24/09/2015 18:24

I have a friend exactly like this. Everything is a game of one upmanship be it good things or bad. It's so annoying I stopped telling them anything about myself. Tell him! It's not so bad with my friend as I can ignore it/not see them but I think you need to speak to him about how you feel.

Original poster
Seishan101 · 24/09/2015 18:26

Just to add, I know at a glance this seems like a petty thing but he's like it with everything I do.

When I had important exams at university he would just say "well, I have a hard day at work tomorrow, it's just the real world isn't it."

If ever I have a really bad shift and come home in a state he'll say "well I always have bad days, it's just life when you work isn't it."

If I'm ill he'll say "well I feel like shit, you just have to get on with it don't you."

It's literally EVERYTHING.

OP posts:
goawayalready · 24/09/2015 18:27

you climb a hill he climbed a mountain

i know the type sadly

Anniegetyourgun · 24/09/2015 18:27

He sounds like a bit of an arse tbh.

Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 24/09/2015 18:28

Does this job pay loads more? If so I'd go for it and tell him to stick his snidy competition up his arse.
Good luck.

Narp · 24/09/2015 18:29

It doesn't sound petty at all. It sounds a great shame he can't listen to you without making it about him. Why would he 'naturally have no sympathy' with his wife. That would upset me.

Either he's a git, or he's behaving like one because there's something he's not saying and so it's leaking out as snideness.

wowfudge · 24/09/2015 18:29

Perhaps you are overly dramatic?

rollonthesummer · 24/09/2015 18:29

Sounds like he's being an arse. Have you sat him down and pointed out he does this?

Narp · 24/09/2015 18:30

What is the 'just starting out' thing about? Have you been a SAHM for a while?

Ememem84 · 24/09/2015 18:31

I know the type. The ones who've been to eleveneriffe.

OddBoots · 24/09/2015 18:31

It sounds like he's quite bitter about it all.

OurBlanche · 24/09/2015 18:32

OK.

  1. go to the interview and scope out the new possibility. Make sure you get enough information to help you decide. Good luck.
  1. As MN so often asks, what exactly does your DP do to lighten your life?

If he can't support you, makes you feel silly, what good is he to you?

And again, good luck with the interview. You now have more information about you and jobs than you had before you started your current job. Use it to investigate the reality of this dream job!

Primadonnagirl · 24/09/2015 18:34

Eleveneriffe! Love it! Took me ages to work it out but love it!

laffymeal · 24/09/2015 18:36

Lol, my DH calls them eleveneriffes as well.

That said, he has competitive illness. I can't say I've got a headache/sore stomach/sore throat or he'll instantly claim he has "the flu", it's very annoying.

TheCraicDealer · 24/09/2015 18:39

My partner is in the army, they call people like this Billy Two Shits- if you say you've just been for one, well he's just had two.

Sounds like your partner has a bit of a chip on his shoulder about you achieving stuff. Give it a few years and he'll be saying shit like he's "been to the university of life" while you were dossing around.

OurBlanche · 24/09/2015 18:40

eleveneriffes....

Go on, I know I a missing something.... make me feel silly, explain in words of less than one syllable please Smile

StarlingMurmuration · 24/09/2015 18:42

I had a friend like that too - if you said you were tired, she'd say "YOU'RE tired?! I'M exhausted!" I friend-dumped her after a while.

Narp · 24/09/2015 18:43

OOurBlanche

If you've been to Tenerife, they can better it. They've been to Elevenerife

trian · 24/09/2015 18:43

When I had important exams at university he would just say "well, I have a hard day at work tomorrow, it's just the real world isn't it."

No, it isn't. He sounds like someone that's never done exams. I've done both (full-on real world jobs with lots of pressure, and lots of exams), they are patently not the same, if you fuck up in an exam, that's it, you fail, whereas if you fuck up at work, there are normally ways to deal with it unless you've fucked up really badly.

I would have stamped on him (not literally) and got rid of him (sorry, I know that's maybe not what you want to hear).

MyCatIsABiggerBastardThanYours · 24/09/2015 18:44

So what do you get that is good from your DP?

Effic · 24/09/2015 18:48

ourblanche
ELEVENerife rather than TENerife

DearTeddyRobinson · 24/09/2015 18:50

I'm going to go against the grain here and suggest that what he is saying is not that unreasonable. People complaining about work etc is normal but perhaps you are overdoing it? Maybe it's his crap way of saying, you need to get this in perspective, everyone who works has something to complain about (hours, money, colleagues etc) - that's life! So stop moaning & get on with it. Are you a drama queen about stuff?

Narp · 24/09/2015 18:51

Since when is sharing feelings being a drama queen?

OurBlanche · 24/09/2015 18:54

[facepalm x 4]

Thanks, I think Blush

KevinAndMe · 24/09/2015 18:54

Dear in your world, is it OK to ask for emotional support from your partner?

And, would you feel it's appropriate to consider every single comment as being moaning and not always, always, have it worse than your partner?

Because I don't feel either of them are an way to behave.