To think you shouldn't find your child taking a snail and deliberately stomping on it very funny at all?

[OstentatiousBreastfeeder]

A friend texted me earlier apparently in stitches because her son had found a snail, thought it was dead and showed it to her. It turned out to be alive after all, so he took it up the garden, stomped on it three times and shouted 'its dead now!"

She then filmed him standing next to the poor squished thing and asked him what he had done, then sent the video to me with lots of lols, crying-laughing emoticons and 'he's so cute'. I didn't really share the humour.

She's now accusing me of being oversensitive and weird, because it's 'just a snail.'

Its less to do with a snail being squashed (though I do rescue them from paths ) than it is her finding it hilarious, to be honest. She's told me to speak to her when I find a sense of humour and lighten up a bit.

Not really sure I want to lighten up if it means finding children being unnecessarily cruel hilariously funny.

I should add that her son is 3, and (imo) old enough to be told about and then somewhat understand the rights and wrongs of hurting other living things.

So am I being weird and sensitive? Or is this something worth being about? Would you laugh along?

trout, gleefully killing something is wrong. I kill earthworms when I dig the garden. I feel bad about it (and waste a lot of time relocating various bugs to safer corners of the garden), but I know the work has to be done. There's a difference.

Also, to the proud vegans / veggies, that's awesome for you, but I'm a meat-eater and I also don't gleefully kill anything. You can be an omnivore and still care about NOT personally killing creatures, just pointing that out.

I don't think it's funny but I don't think snail-icide is 'horrifying' either. Around here slugs get killed before they get the chance to kill the plants.

I think the horrid thing here isn't so much the killing as the killing for pleasure or fun.

I don't kill spiders (I put them outside our leave them be, but then spiders don't bother me unless they're large enough to look like they could finish a happy meal) but I think even ardent spider killers on mn don't do it for the sheer pleasure of it, more a helpless 'how else can I be rid of it?'.

It's a perfect opportunity to have the 'living things' talk and encourage empathy.

And I happily kill any huge spiders that find their way indoors.

No, it's not funny. I was cross with my 2 year old for stomping on a beetle deliberately. Yes, I get plenty of snail crunches when I go running on a damp night, but I wouldn't go out of my way to get them.

It's the intent and pleasure from it that is unpleasant.

YANBU there is nothing cute about a little boy deliberately killing a snail and then filming his response - that's a bit odd to me. But then I don't kill spiders either so I would think that.

I've just had to teach DS 4 that you don't do this. He mostly did it to wind up DD 8. Why would any parent find this funny? Does she kick puppies for laughs too? I hope she comes back as a snail and some kid treads on her.

squoosh you do not need to kill spiders.
They do not bite or spread disease.
In fact they are good for your house as they will keep the fly population down without the need for poisonous (to bees) sprays.
Unless you were raised in Australia there is no excuse for this.

I don't need an excuse.

In answer to what she said to you I'd be telling her that in that case it would be a cold day in hell before you speak to her again.

Spiders are sweet and should be cherished

God no it's not funny, it's also not nice being 'proud' of it.
A respect for nature is where a respect of the world and others come from.

Is your friend a gardener? Because if so, her son may well have seen his parents stamping on snails, and be copying. Sounds horrible, but no worse than snail bait in my opinion - in fact probably better. Snails can do a lot of damage in gardens, and most gardeners try to control them.

Suggesting she is raising a budding psychopath is a little OTT, in my opinion.

Ant stomping is another one that gets me. It's just bullying something smaller

I bathe in virgin's blood Barbarian.

Just the one virgin Squoosh? Must have been a big one

One per day does me.

I could not rise to caring about the fate of a snail

Nor me, generally. I stepped on one yesterday (by accident) and had a momentary 'Oh dear, poor snail' thought before carrying on with my day. I'm not about to lay flowers for it - shit happens, bad luck snail.

I'm the same with spiders in the house. I will always, always try and get them in a glass and take them to the garden - but in the perilous situation that a spider is about to escape and there's no time, they get squished. And again, I feel marginally bad for them, but i'm bordering on phobic about spiders and would literally not sleep if I knew one was loose in the house, so i'm afraid that wins. Bad luck spider.

But to kill something for no actual need, and to find it amusing - whether that's a cat/mouse/spider/ant or anything else - is just rotten and makes you a fucking horrible person, or in this case a fucking terrible parent.

YANBU op.

I'll do my very best to catch spiders with our very nifty spider catcher - I don't like the thought of killing anything and if I can put it outside safely I will. Occasionally I can't dispose of it without killing it - but what I would never do is kill something outside and then film it and laugh about it.

Bet it ends up on FB - the weird stuff that people film their kids doing and upload in the name of comedy never ceases to amaze me.

@ large enough to finish a happy meal

Snails and slugs are killed so the don't eat all the plants.

Spiders are carefully relocated from the house to outside.

Try my damed hardest to kill mossies, the little fuckers.

Don't actively try to kill individual wasps except I've had whole nests destroyed when they have been on the house.

Yanbu.

I typed a reply but it went missing! What's going on?

Anyway, yes, I don't kill spiders either. They kind of just hang out in my garden getting fat off all the flies.

I don't feel like getting back to her at all. Its becoming more and more obvious that the ways we parent our children are very different. You can rub along nicely with people who do things differently until you can't, and I think that time has come. It's not just about snails but I'm sure she'll tell people it is. Oh well!

Not funny at all :(