To wonder if anything from childhood still annoys you?

[Blackcloudsbrightsky]

It's not ATAAT, honestly it isn't!

It is a continuation of that though - I wondered if anyone else remains annoyed at something that happened when they were a child?

I have a strange relationship with food and I know that stems from childhood - won't go into it here.

Two things that do annoy me still when I think about them are the car journeys. I suffer from severe motion sickness (people have tried to 'cure' me in the past by insisting I'll be fine if I look out of a window or suck a sweet HA I will spray your car and it serves you right!) but my parents still used to drive MILES all the time, from the midlands to the south of France and even Italy I spent days hot and nauseous and vomiting and everyone else was miserable too and I was blamed for their misery!

I also remain bitter about being smacked at primary school for wetting myself! Pretty sure it was illegal to do that!

So I am wondering if anyone else has injustices from childhood that grate still

I have a very vivid memory that I cannot let go!

My Grandparents lived in a small row of very old farm cottages with a newer 1930's estate built around it. Some of the houses gardens were accessible via a small road next to the cottages. The family's were quite friendly with each other and we spent alot of time with my Grandparents.

One day when I was about 8, I was outside skipping when a girl appeared who was staying at her grandparents and asked if she could play. She boasted a bit about the toys she had and then picked up a handful of stones and lobbed them over one of the garden fences in to one of the gardens of a guy who collected vintage cars. He came storming out shouting and seemed to know the other girl. He asked her who did it and the little bitch pointed at me!!! So he knocked on my Grandad's door and told him to tell me off! Grandad was having none of it because I was very shy and would never ever had dared to do anything like that. I was always too afraid to be naughty. It was a bit of a stand off with the guy insistent that this kid wouldn't lie. I was just crying the whole time because I hated people thinking I might have actually done it!

Anyway everytime she came out to play after that I'd go back inside. 15 years later it turns out that she married a friend of a friend who is also a total knob. Whenever I see them together on FB I think of how well suited they are.

I wonder what our children will write about us?

My parents wouldn't let me be a ball girl at queens club tennis tournament because it would interfere with my studying for end of year exams....it wasn't even my O' level year.

I was asked to be a fairy in the school play with 2 other girls. We all decorated our wands. The other girls had pink sparkles and glitter. I went for green fluorescent paint because I was no conventional fairy!

My job was quietly changed to manning to the tuck shop.

pictish I was wondering that too

No one believing me that my primary school teacher didn't like me. She had written me off as thick, holding me back on all sorts of things. I wasn't thick, just left handed. My mum believed the teacher, not me.
I was bullied all through senior school and after telling my mum I realised I wasn't going to get any support at home or at school. I'm sure it's contributed to the mental health problems I have to this day.

The one incident that sticks with me above all is this: -
I was 7 or 8 and it was the last day of term before Christmas. We were making Christmas hats and my mum had sent me in with some materials and some very strict instructions on what to do (control freak!)
I did my best. I freely admit it wasn't brilliant, but I wasn't very old and I was nervous. The school had a competition for which one was best, I didn't win.
I went home wearing it and my mum completely flipped out. I was subjected to a long shouty rant about how it wasn't good enough and how I'd obviously not done as she said. I was sent to my room in floods of tears.
When I came down much later, she'd completely remade the thing. I have no idea why. I honestly think she thought I was going to go rushing up to it and say "Wow thanks mum, its just perfect and you're brilliant and you're so much better than me at everything!"
In reality I said nothing, I ignored it. It sat there for the whole if the Christmas holidays with me pretending I couldn't see it. Nobody mentioned it. After Christmas was over, it vanished.
It's quite a petty thing, but is indicative of my mums general attitude when I was younger.

My mum used to say to me 'my mother ruined the first half of my life and you have ruined the second half.'

I wasn't an easy child, but I think that is cruel.

I'm only halfway through the thread but someone mentioned that there are adults who make liars out of children, and it reminded me of a recent incident that would have played out very differently had it been me as a child.

Family bbq, invited few of DDs school chums as well as some extended family. My cousin and his wife, B had come over on their bikes. They'd left them parked up near the fence. DD and her friends had congregated in the area to chat. I'd noticed them there and they were all behaving so left them to it. They're all very polite, well mannered children.

The wife came up to me all a-fluster "She (DD) has just called DH, an fat arse!!"

Well I flew to DD, ready to bollock her. DD, seeing me approach, gave me a big content grin and said "this is great mum!" So hardly the actions of a guilty 11 yo. I quizzed her on what had just happened (without telling her the accusation) and she told me, surrounded by her unfazed friends, that my cousin had come up to them and told them to stay away from the bikes. DD had said they were just sitting chatting and that her bum wouldn't fit on the bike anyway as her bum wasn't as big as his (standard level of jokey banter in our family) to which he had laughed, called her cheeky and eventually walked back to his wife.

This transaction was witnessed by 2 adults, stood to the side (one being my dad) who verified that DD hadn't swore and the exchange was very jovial.

The next day I got a text from the wife "hope she wasn't too upset being told off but they really pushed it with DH"

I again asked DD to tell me the truth, had she swore at the cousin. DD promised, tearfully that she hadn't.

So I replied "I'm sorry that your DH misheard my DD, but she didn't swear and she's not a liar, so she hasn't been told off for something she didn't do"

No reply.

I'm seething about it. What drove a man of 33 years to lie to his wife about an 11 year old girl.

Had this happened when I was a child, I wouldn't have been questioned, I wouldn't have been allowed to give my version of events, I'd have been assumed guilty and chastised accordingly - adults don't lie after all.

That's completely bizarre BrianCox. Do you think that maybe she's the one who has embellished the truth?

I mean the wife, not your DD of course!

No I think he did, he has form for being untrustworthy, they were invited so as not to fuel drama (got to love family) but for the most part, I actually get on with them...in very much a keeping-at-arms distance kinda way.

She is a drama queen and a trouble maker. So they obviously bounce off each other.

It is utterly bizarre but I believe DD totally. I'm not the type to automatically assume innocence either, I'm aware my daughter is ultimately 11 and has huge swine potential

This thread is rather sad. I remember my 'D'F coming home from work with 2 bags of crisps. My DB and I were about 5 and 8 respectively. Salt and vinegar crisps (which we were both obsessed with to the exclusion of every other flavour) were generally in blue bags then. 'D'F had 1 brown and 1 blue. Asked who wanted which. colour pack. DB shouted quickly 'blue blue blue!' F said ' don't be so greedy! You didn't give notabear a chance! What colour do you want notabear?' Of course I said blue, not out of spite, but because we were both obsessed with s&v. Turned out my arse of a father had bought some random brand which had blue ready salted and brown s&v. As it happens, my parents are rather nasty assholes, and my DB is (including by his own admission) the golden child who had a much easier ride than me, but i've never understood the nastiness of it. I know it's small, petty nastiness, but still, crisps cost about ten fucking pence at the time, but were still a luxury high treat in our house. why not just buy two bags of salt and vinegar flavour for your salt and vinegar obsessed kids? (And to be clear if we ever had plain crisps, we'd add vinegar to the pack, it was fairly obvious!)

I know kids can be a pain in the arse, annoying, whiny, know it all! Spiteful, unkind... In fact everything we grown ups can be but without filters. I've got a fractured wrist at the moment and spent the last week trying to stop a somewhat trying six year old going thru a spiteful phase hitting it, but although I've shouted at her when she's hurt me, I've not turned round and told her she's a nasty person, or said horrible things (even if I've thought them, little cowbag!). It isn't that fuckimg hard to be kind to kids, to stop and remember how shite you felt when no one listened or took the piss when you were a kid.

Haha, my story looks pathetic compared to some, but it's just the petty nastiness of it that gets to me to this day, and tbh this is nothing compared to the rest of the shite i had as a child, but it's weird how this one stands out. I think it was the way my DB 'won' as he was always allowed to do, but then my twat F made me hope that I'd be 'allowed' to get the better deal for once, only to stitch me up. And then smirk at me. Twat.

Not childhood, but still relate to mum's attitude to smoking and me (she sounds very much like your mum, tbh, katie).

I was doing my nurse training, and living in the Nurses' Home, and she and dad came to visit. She lit up in my room - my bedroom - without asking if I minded - which I really did. My room reeked afterwards.

Again, not childhood, but I went to university aged 25 - I was doing Music as one of my subjects, and I sang a number of solos (voice was my instrument) in university concerts - and mum never came to a single one. Dad did, but mum couldn't be bothered.

Recently,,when I apologised for not having been able to go and help her sort out her house before moving, she said, "You don't know how hard it is, being old, alone, in pain, and having to do it all with no help - but I hope you find out one day!" Thanks mum.

KatieLatie

Reminds me of the endless family treks up and down the mountains in the Lake District and my Nan would only allow us sips of weak juice. We were only allowed a drink after our evening meal, because if.we had a sip of juice prior to eating we'd ruin our appetites

Like yours, my children always have plenty of drinks available to them.

Petty one. When I was about 11 I jumped off a wall, landed on a broken bottle, ended up 6 stitches on my shin. Cut never healed properly and when they took them out the cut reopened. The doctor said "we could restitch it, but let's face it she's never going to be modelling tights is she?" He probably didn't mean anything by it, but as a body concious over weight pre teen it stuck with me forever. (Funnily enough I never did model tights, not with a huge fuck off scar...)

My earliest memory of school is one that still annoys me to this day. In reception I used to take crackers for my break, they would be wrapped in cling film and put into my bag which I wore across my body. It was a tiny bag and could only just fit the crackers in it. One day we were lined up and the teacher noticed a paper bag on the display table, she asked who it belonged to and who had dared to litter. Some of the boys pointed to me and I got a right telling off because I was "the only one who took crackers so it had to be" my litter. I tried to explain that the crackers went in my purse and that they wouldn't fit in if they were in that bag but she wouldn't listen, she said of course it was mine because the crackers would make a mess otherwise. I couldn't remember what cling film was called so I couldn't argue, she called me a liar and that kind of stuck with me all through school.

God I've got loads, mostly related to my DM being incredibly selfish - fair enough she was very young (20 when she had me, 21 when my Father left for his PA) but I always came firmly second place to whichever boyfriend was on the scene at a given time.

The incident that sticks most in my mind is being dragged hysterical from my bed at about 6am & round to the care of an elderly neighbour so Mum could go out for the day with flavour of the month. I must have been about 7 and remember distinctly howling at her not to leave me, and her going anyway. The chap, by the way, was married, and it was common knowledge in our village. I was bullied until the end of primary school because of it (which she knew about).

She wasn't the worst Mum in the world by any means, but things like that have had a lasting impact on our relationship; although she still denies the worst of it ever happened.

On a lighter note, if 16 counts as being a child, I shall never forget opening the christmas present from my first boyfriend, which was the same size & shape as a particular cuddly toy I'd seen in a shop when we were out together (it was the alien from toy story, I thought they were awesome). I was so thrilled that he'd taken note.

I opened it, in front of him, and it was a stuffed south park character. I HATED south park with a passion, which he knew! I cried. There was drama. It was awkward. 2 days later he got me the alien.

It still makes me cringe now. And I still hate south park.

Getting a detention in High School for not bringing my technical drawing gear in for a test when we hadn't been told about it. The only bloody detention I ever got.

There are much bigger things that I can let go, that's the thing that bugs me.

Reading these, it's almost comforting to know that others had similar problems growing up. I never experienced the selfish or loveless.parenting or abuse, my heart goes out to those that did.

I was a troubled child. Way too long to go into, but parents divorced and we were hauled from the beautiful Hampshire countryside to the middle of a grimy pit-town in the midst of the Miner's Strike.

Mum didn't believe in me being dressed "girly" (sound familiar anyone out there who is trying to not impose.pink on their child...? ) so I was dressed hideously like a Victorian reject, because mum thought it looked cute. Velvet pantaloons, high necked long sleeved corduroy dress to name but a few. Also i wanted red wellies and ended up.with my older cousin's cowboy boots. In 1983 (ish) nice.

So, southern accent and dressed like a clown. Poor. Single mother

i had a very happy childhood but my teenage years were spent in a constant battle with my DM and step dad. After one nasty argument when i was around 13 my mum told me i was adopted (i'm imagining to shut me up I spent the next 2 days crying and crying before she told me it was a lie. Not so much harm done now, but i still think it was unnecessarily cruel, especially considering how emotionally fragile you are aged 13!!

Age 12, first year at secondary school, some older pupils thought it would be funny to trip me up. I sprained my ankle badly, and more than 30 years later, still seeing a physio to fix it.

Other relatives, sisters etc all had a party after their Holy Communion. With mine, my father had some 'important' match to go to that weekend in his home town 3 hours drive away so instead of having a party after the ceremony, he rushed off to go to that afterwards. I still remember feeling very upset because the whole day just turned into a rushed mess where I barely had time for photos with my friends or anything because he was just focused on getting away in time for this match. We only had one car so we were pretty much stuck at home for the whole weekend he was away. Don't remember him ever apologizing or trying to make it up to me.

In general most of my childhood had the feeling that my parents were fed up of the whole parenting / birthday party / school sports day / big milestones thing and just couldn't be arsed anymore. Life as the youngest of four, I guess! I'm surprised they even remembered my name sometimes...

After my DGPs moved from their farm to a village, we often played with their neighbours' son. One day he teased DGPs' dog with a stick and she snapped at him. Next thing I knew, DDog had been put down as 'she hadn't handled the move well'. I'm sure as responsible dog owners DGPs thought they were doing the right thing but DSis and I (6 and 8) had seen no other changes in DDog. She was a lovely friendly thing so full of life and I can't help feeling that had neighbours shown their son how to treat dogs, she wouldn't have had her life cut short like that. We never played with the son again.