to think they should have gone into toilet /somewhere more private?

[loveandsmiles]

Took DD to weekly toddler gym session at local leisure centre. There is a class on beforehand so we have to queue outside - glass wall looking into gym and further glass wall overlooking swimming pool - there are 20 toddlers in the class - ages 2 to 3 years. Not much space to queue, filled with 20 adults, children, buggies etc.

Anyway, one of the toddlers says she needs a poo - luckily toilets are opposite to where we are queuing - ladies, gents, family /baby change/disabled. Well, the mum gets a potty out of a carrier bag and sits it down where they are in queue, pulls down toddlers clothing and sits her on it! In middle of queue, in full view of people already in gym and those in pool. Toddler proceeds to poo.......

Fully appreciate how hard it can be toilet training and that all children are different - some might not like sitting on a 'big toilet' for instance but should the mum not have taken the potty into the toilets or somewhere a bit more private? I was a bit . I am toilet training my DD at the moment so am not unsympathetic - when they need to go, they need to go but some places are more appropriate than others!!

That is soooo wrong! Yanbu!

The whole point of toilet training is that the child gets used to the whole toilet process... And sometimes that means coming out of lines and having to run to the toilet, etc. Not only is it detrimental for the child - having to do "private" things in public -imo- cant be good. But the smells would have been offensive for the other customers. I'm surprised the staff didn't say anything. X

I hate the toilet training stage with a passion! I've never used potties but absolutely never seen them used like this before.

driver that must be difficult for you. My DD us obsessed with toilets at the moment - came out gym class 3 times as she supposedly needed a wee wee - still didn't do one - waited until we were home then wet her pants

That is really rather grim. I saw someone whip out a potty at toddler group last week. The toddler group takes place in a large hall, with a foyer, and just off the foyer are men's, women's and disabled loos. Why? Just why?

YANBU.

If she's that close to a public toilet, then she should have taken the potty into the toilets and sat the child on the potty in there. Especially as she'd have to go in there to empty and clean out the potty anyway.

We do have a portable potty (one that can double as a toilet booster seat) for DS1, but it's only used outside of toilets if he needs to go urgently and there's no toilets anywhere nearby.

Yanbu.

What did she do with the poo? Surely she had to go into toilets to flush it away and clean up.

Part of toilet training is teaching the child about the appropriate places to poo and wee.

I did have a travel potty for real emergencies if toilets were not readily available, but if we were just outside a decent toilet facility I would have made them go in there.

My DD2 tended to be scared of any toilet that wasn't at home. Getting her toileted when out of the house sometimes could be a real performance. She did just have to get over herself though, whilst digging her nails deep into my arms.

shadow and top yes, went into toilets anyway to dispose of poo so could have just gone in there to start with - madness! Thing is no one else in queue batted an eyelid, as if this was perfectly normal, whilst I am standing with my shocked face This was only our second time at the class so maybe she does it all the time and everyone is used to it??

That's ridiculous behaviour, and you mentioned OP she had to go into the toilets anyway to get rid of the poo. If she was afraid of losing her place in the line she should have just turned to the person next in line and asked if he/she would mind holding her place as she had a toilet emergency to take care of. I'm sure 99% of people would be happy to hold a place in line (especially if the alternative was to whip out a potty!).

Was in a shoe shop once and a woman whipped out a potty and persuaded her DS to sit on it in the middle of the shop, wouldn't let him get off until he'd peed in it. He kept saying he didn't want to go but she insisted.

Utterly bizarre, Especially as the (child friendly) toilets were all of ten feet away.

It is disgusting. Almost as bad as making/letting a child pee in a car park when they could use the loos in the store it's attatched to.

snotty why, just why on earth would you even think of doing that. Gosh even that poor child in shoe shop sounded embarrassed. There is nothing shameful in going to the toilet but even so it should be done in private.

This reminds me of a friend who when toilet training her son kept the potty in the middle of the living room floor - she couldn't be bothered getting up from the sofa every time he needed so he just did the toilet in front of the TV. It is annoying trouping to the toilet for what feels like the hundredth time but it's got to be done - my toddler especially waits on me sitting down to breast feed baby then she asks to go!!

Ugh! YADNBU!

When DD was potty training, I used to take her potty in a carrier bag everywhere we went just in case (we walk most places, and often quite a long way)
If there are toilets, we used them, whether that was DD used the actual public toilet, or we took her potty in instead.
DD was pretty good with the potty training stage though, thank god.
Only once have I had to let DD use it in public, she was desperate, and had held on for ages while we tried to find a loo, and I nipped behind a ladies hedge in her front garden to do it, lady came out and amongst all my profuse apologies, DD just couldn't wait any longer etc etc. She offered to let DD use her downstairs toilet, but DD was already done on the potty.
She did let me empty it though, which was so lovely of her, as I was actually trespassing I suppose. She understood I think, that sometimes it's unavoidable.

When there are toilets 10 steps away though, it's totally ridiculous to pull a potty out in public! Poor kid!

Yuck.

Even if they have a fear of toilets you find somewhere more private

YANBU. I had a friend whose son was a bit slow to train and she seemed to think nothing of lying him down to change him in a room full of people...he was four! Poor kid....no dignity!

I once said to her, "Why don't you take him to the bathroom?" and she looked at me like I'd suggested she slap him!

I think some people fail to see that their DC isn't cute/perfect/inoffensive to other people.

YANBU but that is far better than what some parents do in our town. They let their children poo on the pavement and in the gardens round the church. And sad to say it is not only the children but sometimes the adults. Also there is a lot of urinating in public. Suppose it goes with the drinking throughout the day. There is no shame these days.

Does anyone remember that thread started by the bloke who was incandescent that his wife was reprimanded by the staff when she whipped out the portapotty in Peter Jones' fabric department so their PFB could have a poo?

That was brilliant (but sadly deleted I think because it was so identifiable).

YANBU OP.

Drive - my DS has sensory processing disorder and wouldn't use public loos for years. He was okay with disabled ones though as you have control of the hand-drier in there (ie you don't use it). As the mother of a child with a disability, I would have no issue with you using the loo in there for your DD because of her phobia.

"I think some people just lose their mind when they have a baby."

This

I might use this for a lot of threads today

OP YANBU.

I took DD into a disabled loo with her potty a few weeks back, Lynda. I ended up triggering the hand dryer (THAT I HADNT EVEN SEEN!) as I poured the potty contents down the loo. DD went bananas and hasn't set foot in a disabled loo or baby change room since

YANBU. I think the worst case I've seen was at a large open-air paddling pool in a London park, where there were toilets nearby, and the dad walked over and rinsed the potty in the paddling pool.

/boak

Oh no Driver! Could you make it into a detective game - looking for the hand drier before you go in? I still breathe a huge sigh of relief if there's paper towel dispensers, even if DS isn't with me. Plus he's much better than he was (but didn't really get over it until he was about 7 and still won't use them and freaks at those super speed Dyson things that GForce the skin on your hands)

That's disgusting. what's the point when she had to leave the queue anyway.

how inconsiderate nd revolting

ArcheryAnnie WTF was he thinking?

OP your description sounds exactly like the layout of my local leisure centre. And YANBU. DS went to toddler gym class and always just went to the toilet beforehand.

Its not even. a queue by the sounds of it Giles

Just waiting to get into an already paid for class

Did everyone in the queue do that British thing of scowling slightly and tutting, but not saying anything directly to the mother?

Christ alive what is wrong with people that is grim!!!!!!