For not being arsed about the house being in his sole name for now?

[ThaiRice]

Our house is actually officially DP's house as I am not on the mortgage or deeds.

Originally he put around ??20k on the deposit. I contributed ??2.5k. Since then we have jointly paid the mortgage but obviously on paper, I have no rights.

The idea was that we'd get the house in both names when the time came to remortgage. This time is now fast approaching (October) and now that DP has looked into it, he's apparantly discovered that it will cost us a fortune in stamp duty to change the title deeds or something.

We're getting married in May so my legal protection will come from the marriage from then on anyway so I'm tempted to just wait until we're legally married and then I have rights to the house anyway (I assume).

Part of me (cynical side) saw this coming - that the time would come to change the deeds and DP would discover 'issues' with doing so.

AIBU to think that we may as well wait until May as I would have my legal protection regarding the house after the marriage anyway or should I be pushing to get it done now? is he taking me for a mug or what?

We looked into getting my DH's name on the deeds. It would cost £100 admin fees. That is it. We decided we'd rather keep the £100. As you are not married, you have a child and you are helping to pay for the house I would spend the £100 on the legal protection.

We've just done the TOE thing - mortgage was in DH's name and got a remortgage done with me as a joint applicant. Cost just under £300. We have DC so it made sense to us!

When youre dealing with thousands put into a property, paying £250 between you is not unreasonable and is a tiny percentage of the properties value - I would insist on it being done before the wedding. If he carries on dragging his feet, propose putting back the wedding date until after it can be done.

I dont think hes necessarily being devious about this, but he is seeing no benefit to HIM in paying money to have you added and thats not a mindset you want to enter into a marriage with, youre supposed to both do whats best for both of you.

I think the deeds issue is one of many problems you have OP,I'm afraid.

This guy sounds no good.

FFS if it's financial security you're after the last thing you should be doing is cancelling or postponing the wedding. that gives you the best financial security money can buy!!!

We're making an appointment to speak to solicitor to arrange a tenants in common agreement so we each have our shares of the house protected. Once that's done we're going to apply for a joint mortgage

I don't think it would be a completely outrageous thing to do in itself. Obviously a risk, because he could fall under a bus any day between now and the wedding, but can see why you might just not be arsed. However, the fact that you saw this coming is a massive red flag. There's evidently some kind of issue here. And that's what makes it a bad idea. It's not quite true that you have no rights btw- if you can document that you've paid towards the deposit and the mortgage, you have an interest. It can just be a bugger to prove and protect sometimes.