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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to have 2 days off work as my child has been sick and I need to follow 48 hour rule

72 replies

peppajay · 08/09/2015 22:49

AIBU that I need to take time off work when my child is ill as I don't have family close by to help. I am going to have to take the next two days off as my son has been sick so he now needs 48 hours off school. Most of the other members of staff leave their kids with family but I have no one close by and I don't think I can expect a friend to look after a child who is probably contagious. I had 2 days off when my DD was sick last year and it was frowned upon. I am so very very tempted to just keep him off for 24 hrs as I know alot of my colleagues do this so they only have to find childcare for the one day. So as I working parent how do I get round this??

OP posts:

AgentProvocateur · 08/09/2015 22:52

You are allowed reasonable time off to make arrangements, but this would be half a day at my work, or a day at most other places. Do you have a partner who can take time off?

Farahilda · 08/09/2015 22:58

If your child is 'probably contagious' then they need to be at home, not school. And someone needs to be there.

If you cannot take leave at short notice, then you'll need to shell out for a temporary nanny. Expensive, but worth it if it keeps your career intact.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 08/09/2015 23:15

Definitely not. Your DS is unwell and needs his mummy.
Has your boss's children never been sick.
Your children come first and that's that

attheendoftheday · 08/09/2015 23:17

We're allowed a day's leave to make suitable arrangements. We cover two days by taking a day each.

scarlets · 08/09/2015 23:17

Yanbu. The 48h rule is pretty well known. What about OH? Could you do s day each?

Kampeki · 08/09/2015 23:17

Are you a single mum? Could the child's dad look after her for the other day?

Kampeki · 08/09/2015 23:18

Oh sorry, it's your DS who is sick, not dd.

overthemill · 08/09/2015 23:18

I agree, you get time to make arrangements in such an emergency. Take a day each

overthemill · 08/09/2015 23:20

This is really hard, I know from bitter experience having to have the first TWO WEEKS of a new job off for ill child that you need to plan for this to happen and have a back up plan. Cultivate someone locally, find a person who will co e to your home in the future etc. it's so hard I know

mandy214 · 08/09/2015 23:25

YANBU to have 2 days off to look after your child. YABU to expect your employer to fund that, it's not their problem that your child is sick or that you have no family close by.

I'd be allowed a half day's emergency leave to wait in for / arrange temporary cover. I think you either have to use a temporary nanny /work from home / take annual leave / take unpaid parental leave for the additional time - whichever solution is most reasonable and workable for you & your employer.

And your OH should be helping too (or its his turn next time your child is ill).

PennyHasNoSurname · 08/09/2015 23:28

DH and I split this sort of leave, and whoever has less important work on that day will take the leave, then we swap if need be for the next day. I also work shifts so can sometimes just ask to swap onto a Late, and DH insists on leaving early on time to get home for me leaving.

If you have an OH can he help?

Spartans · 09/09/2015 07:03

Yanbu to take the time.

I work for myself but when I was employed, they would give you a few options for the second day. Unpaid, holiday and (some managers) would put it down as you were sick if you had a good sickness record and wanted it. Then you would get paid, dodgy but they tried to help people out.

My employer was also more understanding when people were obviously at least trying and didn't have other options. We used to have one guy took time off when his kids were sick, everytime, even though his wife was a sahm. I knew her and she hated him staying at home when they were ill. So he justs managed to piss everyone off

ladybug201 · 09/09/2015 07:08

I'm fairly sure that if the Ops partner had been able to take time off the solution would have come to her.

I'd personally be tempted to send him in if he seems all right.

Shiningdew · 09/09/2015 07:12

Take the time if you need it. My situation sounds similar to yours and you just can't magic people from thin air.

BrandNewAndImproved · 09/09/2015 07:13

I had to have two weeks off once as the dc caught chicken pox one after the other.

Where I then you could have 3 days paid parental leave and the rest I had to have unpaid.

I would ring up your work and say you've been sick. Yes it's a lie but it's easier then being frowned on.

WhoisLucasHood · 09/09/2015 07:16

I've taken unpaid parental leave for this.

SoupDragon · 09/09/2015 07:16

Yes it's a lie but it's easier then being frowned on.

Not if the lie is found out it isn't.

Duckdeamon · 09/09/2015 07:19

If you have a partner they should share the time off.

BrandNewAndImproved · 09/09/2015 07:21

Soup sometimes you can't afford to take unpaid leave. Not oh I won't be able to buy those shoes this month more oh how will I buy food and pay my rent with days off unpaid.

HeyDuggee · 09/09/2015 07:25

I'm sure if there was a DH who could cover half the time, the OP wouldn't be scratching her head and asking the Internet.

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 09/09/2015 07:25

I would ring up your work and say you've been sick. Yes it's a lie but it's easier then being frowned on

And what then if OP catches it a few days later?

Badders123 · 09/09/2015 07:29

Take unpaid parental leave.

Kampeki · 09/09/2015 07:30

I'm fairly sure that if the Ops partner had been able to take time off the solution would have come to her.

You'd think so, wouldn't you, but I still know families where emergency care is the default responsibility of the mother, and there is very little consideration as to whether the father could share the burden. As a manager, I see this frequently.

Konserve · 09/09/2015 07:33

you take a day and dad the other.
that's what we do.
it's only fair.

NerrSnerr · 09/09/2015 07:35

I have friends whose husbands never take time off because they think it's their wife's job. If you do have a partner then get him to share the load.

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