AIBU?
To think this is fucking rude, nosey and slightly unhinged?
Aoifebell · 01/09/2015 14:37
I used to get my ndn to babysit for me. Probably happened about 5 times. The last time she was here was about jan/feb.
I've seen her LOADS of times since then. Had chats she's been here for coffee twice etc. I've just got back from the Asda and she was downstairs talking to another neighbour. She came rushing over to me, basically singing my name as she said hello. Then says to me.
"You know the last time I was in your house babysitting, I saw a letter on the side about you missing five hospital appointments, why haven't you been going?"
My jaw nearly hit the floor! I was so shocked that she a) was reading through my fucking personal stuff and b) she had the brass neck to actually tell me about it, bearing in mind this was how many months ago!
I couldn't get words out, I gave her a puzzled death stare then just said fuck me you're nosey! Why was you reading my stuff? Apparently she's worried about me because I have DD and you know... I don't fucking know! I finished getting my shopping out the car shaking my head the whole time then started going upstairs. As she's walked off she's half laughing saying I know, I'm a nosey babysitter.
I fucking fuming. I feel violated. I need to say something to her but I don't know where to start.
AIBU to feel this angry? AIBU to say something to her? Can some one help me construct a text to send her. I don't want to see her.
Iamatotalandutteridiot · 01/09/2015 14:44
why haven't you been going to your appointments?
Did she actually open your post? Take a letter out of the envelope? Or just read a letter that was there?
I mean, yes, she's out of order... but your reaction makes me think you feel embarrassed that she knows (apologies if I'm totally wrong on that one)
Her reaction makes me think she was trying to 'show you up' infront of the other neighbour...
So, I guess, to know how you should reply, you need to be clear to yourself why you are so angry she knows this piece of information.
XCChamps · 01/09/2015 14:47
I think she's a decent person, doing you some favours, saw something she knows she shouldn't have and has been worrying about you since. She knows she shouldn't have the information which is why it's taken so long to get up the courage to speak to you about it.
Missing 5 appointments is worrying....
Pancakeflipper · 01/09/2015 14:49
Don't send a text. You've already said something. Ignore from now on. Don't allow in your house.
My NDN looked after our animals recently and is utterly bursting to know why we received a letter from the police whilst we were away (the police kindly put the police and relevant district on the back of the envelope). I reckon they will burst in 5months time and ask me.
GloriaHotcakes · 01/09/2015 14:50
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Tinktheterrible · 01/09/2015 14:51
Yanbu, however, don't leave personal papers on the side when you have house guests, chuck it all in a drawer. I've learned this myself from bitter experience.
We also have a really nosy neighbour, I find commenting on her behaviour in a loud voice with the windows open does the trick. Until the next time, she soon forgets. I wouldn't text, it'll just add fuel to the fire.
Aoifebell · 01/09/2015 14:56
I didn't miss five appointments she must of read it wrong in her speed reading! If she was concerned why would she wait all these months to say something? I think she's a nosey cow tbh. I'm not embarrassed im disgusted she went through my stuff. I have a paper pile on top of the microwave. The letter was old and not on top so she's obviously been rooting around.
bigbluebus · 01/09/2015 15:04
Lesson learned. Don't leave personal stuff lying around that you don't want people to see. I have Carers in my house and I make sure that anything of minor value/personal nature is in a locked filing cabinet and DS is constantly reminded not to leave money/bank statements/personal correspondence lying around on the desk in his room - which is opposite the room the carers go into. I trust the carers with my DD but there are some things I do not want seen/talked about so I make sure they are kept out of sight.
You should not, however, miss medical appointments - someone else could have had that appointment if you were not intending to go. If you have a medical problem that needs help/treatment then please use the NHS wisely.
I would put this incident down to experience and you now know something about your NDN that perhaps you didn't know before - she is nosey!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.