Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Flower girls/bridesmaids order!

35 replies

Faye12345 · 31/08/2015 21:07

Hello an issue has cropped up and help needed! My sister is getting married in two weeks and we're due to have the rehearsal tomorrow. However she's panicking about order! I'm chief bridesmaid and two nieces are flower girls (4 and7). How do we work this? Do we go before the bride and I deposit the children with the mums at the top or do we go after ? Her worry about going after is that the kids might run infront of her and they may be too fast for me to stop them!

OP posts:
Original poster
Faye12345 · 31/08/2015 21:12

Realise I've just said deposit the kids with their mums that sounds awful! Sorry

OP posts:
Supermanspants · 31/08/2015 21:20

Send them up first with you

thefourgp · 31/08/2015 21:22

Do it whatever way your sister wants it. We had flower girl first (sat in front row when she got to the front), then bridesmaids, maid of honour with my young sons, then bride. Simples. ????

Original poster
Faye12345 · 31/08/2015 21:24

Fab thanks lady's she's panicking so I said we will seek advice, I had adult bridesmaids so no worries in terms of unpredictability until the drink started later in the day x

OP posts:
Gatehouse77 · 31/08/2015 21:24

In my, limited, experience the flower girls go first then the bridesmaids, lastly the bride and father.

However, for us DH went first with his best man (brother) as he wanted to walk down the aisle!

5madthings · 31/08/2015 21:26

The last wedding I went to the bridesmaids went first, they had little baskets of petals that they sprinkled as they walked up the aisle which was very sweet. Then bride.

Original poster
Faye12345 · 31/08/2015 21:35

Thanks guys it's seems logical to me aswell x

OP posts:
Wolpertinger · 31/08/2015 21:39

4 and 7 should be fine - I had 2 age 3 and one age 6 and no adults! Sent them up ahead of me, mums sat at the front so even if they just ran to their mums up the aisle they'd kind of done it Grin

The older one will prob take it v v v seriously (mine did) and keep the younger one in line.

If I were you I'd send the two of them up ahead of you as bridesmaid, with the bride after you, so if they get sidetracked you can round them up the aisle.

After the bride doesn't really work - they'll be a bit of an anti-climax after the bride's arrival.

mygrandchildrenrock · 31/08/2015 21:41

I had flower girls who went first with rose petals in little baskets. We had to remind them to walk slowly and sprinkle their petals slowly, otherwise they'd have raced down the aisle and thrown petals everywhere!

Mrsjayy · 31/08/2015 22:17

Get the 7yr old to hold the 4yr olds hand if the wee 1 freaks out on the day send her up with a bridesmaid thats what i did when the flower girl decided she wasnt going and dumped her petals on the floor

NotAWhaleOmeletteInSight · 31/08/2015 22:22

Oh god. My dd is going to be a flower girl in a couple of months. She'll be 20 months... At the moment she mostly enjoys storming around laughing and doing impressions of dinosaurs. She's not keen on holding hands.

I should be very very worried, shouldn't I?

Mrsjayy · 31/08/2015 22:33

She will be fine and she can be a frilly dinosaur if she likes nobody will expect hsr to be perfect

MI6Agent · 31/08/2015 22:40

There's loads of YouTube videos of flower girls, get the 4yo to watch some and practice. We did with my Dd (also 4) and she was amazing and ridiculously cute throwing petals everywhere

Nanny0gg · 31/08/2015 22:47

How long has it been the custom for bridesmaids to go first?

teeththief · 31/08/2015 23:12

I thought the same Nanny. I feel old at 35 because the bride always used to go first!

bigchangesabound · 31/08/2015 23:17

bridesmaids and flower girls going first is an American thing. Bride should go first so all eyes are on her.

SouthWestmom · 31/08/2015 23:20

Same here Nanny. Think flower girls is new name for small bridesmaids.

YellowDinosaur · 31/08/2015 23:22

I'm another one who thinks the bride should go first. The other way is weird, IMHO.

I loved walking up the aisle with my eyes locked onto stbdh's. The whole building could have fallen down around us and we wouldn't have noticed. The moment would have been totally lost if I couldn't see him because the bridesmaids were in the way Confused

catyloopylou · 31/08/2015 23:24

When I got married in a church 6 years ago the bridesmaids followed me. The vicar looked shocked when I suggested the other way round, which is an Americanism.

bringthenoise · 01/09/2015 00:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SilverBirchWithout · 01/09/2015 01:04

Isn't the better way to let flower girls and bridesmaids go up the aisle. Leave a gap for them to all settle in position at the end, slight pause and then the bride comes up the aisle with an opportunity to lock eyes etc.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 01/09/2015 01:09

The last one I went to had the flower girls first scattering petals. Then a tiny pause when they'd reached the front and sat down, then the bride followed by her bridesmaids - that worked quite well.

SenecaFalls · 01/09/2015 01:16

In the US, it is normal for the bridesmaids and flower girl(s) to walk down first, but to get into place at the front before the bride starts down, so there is plenty of eye-locking opportunity. A change of music often signals this point.

WhyCantIuseTheNameIWant · 01/09/2015 01:57

When I was I bridesmaid (as a young dinosaur...)
I thought it was our job to watch the back of brides dress, making sure it didn't catch as she went round corners?
That would be tricky if we were in front.

MI6Agent · 01/09/2015 04:44

Isn't the better way to let flower girls and bridesmaids go up the aisle. Leave a gap for them to all settle in position at the end, slight pause and then the bride comes up the aisle with an opportunity to lock eyes etc.

I got married this summer and did it this way. My dd with one bm, then 3 bm's walked down all to one song. Slow fade out whilst everyone sat down and a different song, then I walked down.

I hadn't realised it was American, I just wanted to be the last one to come in.

Swipe left for the next trending thread