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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I know I was a little bit U but surely in these circs I'm a bit allowed?

80 replies

BlueBananas · 27/08/2015 16:11

I went to Home Bargains earlier, it's quite a small car park and I'm pretty sure the spaces are slightly closer together than average spaces
I'm 30 weeks pregnant and I physically can not get in and out of my car if there's a car parked next to me anymore, my bump is just too big, so I parked over the white line meaning I had room to get in and out
A woman getting out of her car near me said "do you know you're over 2 spaces?" I told her I did and explained why, in a kind of laughing at myself way. She didn't say anything in response but as she was walking away I heard her say to her friend "I fucking hate people like that, selfish cow"
I was Shock
So I know I was a bit unreasonable but it's surely understandable? And this reaction was a bit harsh wasn't it?
Also what do others do to get in and out of cars when heavily pregnant? Surely there's a solution that I'm missing

OP posts:
MsMargaretCarter · 27/08/2015 19:41

Wow , the anger over one extra space being used in a non busy car park! Wtf? If the spaces are smaller than usual, these things happen! after all, if the spaces were bigger, then there would be fewer spaces to go round so the odd instance of someone taking two is hardly a big deal.

Never needed to do this myself, but once I did get someone parked so close to me that I had to haul my heavily pregnant self over from the passenger side to be able to drive home. It wasn't pleasant.

Original poster
BlueBananas · 27/08/2015 19:42

I'm really confused as to why people think I would lie? Confused

OP posts:
tomatodizzymum · 27/08/2015 19:42

I wouldn't worry about it, that was an extremely rude thing to do. She obviously didn't have the guts to say it to your face, clearly she has nothing better to occupy her tiny mind with anyway, so you probably did her a favour and gave her a winge topic!

LittleLionMansMummy · 27/08/2015 19:43

Op I sympathise. I used to struggle getting in and out of toilet cubicles when I was heavily pregnant!

But no, not ok to take 2 parking spaces Wink

Waltermittythesequel · 27/08/2015 19:46

I'm really confused as to why people think I would lie?

It's not that I think you're lying per se. It's just, and I mean this in the nicest possible way, my dsis was one of those precious pregnant folks and you could possibly be similar.

MrsLupo · 27/08/2015 19:47

Surprised you're getting such a hard time about this tbh, OP. I detest selfish parking and have been known to have a go at people who indulge in it, but really, you're 30 weeks pg, huge, and there were plenty of other spaces available. I think everyone needs to lighten up a bit. Especially the cow in the car park. Congratulations on your pregnancy btw.

HunterHearstHelmsley · 27/08/2015 19:48

I always park right next to people if I see this.... And take a picture of the cars with number plates showing in case mine is damaged! Pisses me right off! Unless I'm on a lunch break I take my sweet time coming back.

I'm sure anyone could think of a "good reason" to park badly. Just because someone decides the rules don't apply to them doesn't mean they bloody don't!

Fluffyears · 27/08/2015 19:50

Our neighbour does this in the allocated parking, he has no need but seems to want as much of our space as he can. So DP just hits his door as he can't get out otherwise. I said 'be careful!' The other day and dp said 'it's his fault for parking like a cunt I'm fed up with it!' So you might find your car gets more scrapes than usual.

gamerchick · 27/08/2015 19:51

Too many pages named 'u park like a cunt' to risk that sort of stuff. They tend not to blur out number plates. Not that it matters I suppose.

It does sound as if you do it a lot of you're surprised you haven't had a ticket yet though.

I can't get worked up about it though as long as they're a enough parking and it's not jammed packed as you would risk damage to your car if someone was disgruntled enough.

Hygge · 27/08/2015 19:53

I was massive at 30 weeks, and a woman expecting twins sympathised with me because I looked so uncomfortable. From the back you couldn't tell I was pregnant but from the side I had the turning circle of a double decker bus.

Not all bumps are neat and tiny. We've got a picture of me at 27 weeks and I look like I'm about to give birth any moment. I was huge.

I needed all the space I could get in car parks, so I can understand why the OP might need two spaces in a car park that has smaller than average spaces.

By 30 weeks I couldn't walk very far, standing up was painful just because I was so big, sitting down was painful because I was so big, I'd had one operation related to the pregnancy and was due another, my feet were so swollen that my shoes didn't fit, but that was okay because I couldn't reach my feet to put them on.

And I had a complication that meant I was hospitalised for two nights and one doctor came to see me solely to say that he'd read about what happened to me (quiet dramatic, painful and scary, almost meant I had an emergency c-section to save DS's life) but had never seen it in person because it was rare, so he'd been glad to have the opportunity to treat me while it was happening.

And I had raging indigestion for months so had to sleep sitting up.

Also, I nearly died during my second pregnancy, because of an infection that reached my placenta following an accident that resulted in us losing our baby.

So I disagree with people who say pregnancy isn't an illness. Pregnancy itself might not be an illness but it can make you feel very ill and even the most straightforward pregnancy has physical effects on people and many pregnancies have complications that leave people feeling absolutely awful.

I find it really sad that people expect a heavily pregnant woman to be exactly the same as a not pregnant woman, just a bit rounder. My own experience has certainly made me a lot more aware of how difficult some pregnancies are, and I'm quite happy now to make allowances for people because of their pregnancies.

imwithspud · 27/08/2015 19:57

You probably were being unreasonable OP (but you've already addressed that), but I totally get why. I was absolutely huge at 30 weeks pregnant both times. Especially with my second, I looked like I was walking around with a massive beach ball up my top.

If there were plenty of spaces and you were parked away from the store then I really don't see the huge issue.

FoxesSitOnBoxes · 27/08/2015 19:57

I parked in the last space in a car park when I was v pregnant. Couldn't get out of the car cos my bump wouldn't fit through the door. Had to get back in and go home. Some younguns saw me and laughed Blush

ShelaghTurner · 27/08/2015 19:58

As an obese person I can tell you that it's a bloody nightmare. I've lost count of the numbers of times I've parked in a space only to find myself totally unable to get back in the car when I return. At the moment I have a small dd so can use P&C if they're there or it's drive round and round till I find an end space. But today I went to ikea and after 20 mins of driving around I still had to park in a middle space and was stressed all the way round just in case I was stuck.

And yes I know I should lose weight before anyone steams in and tells me, which judging by some of the responses on here, is quite likely.

Spotifymuse · 27/08/2015 20:00

YABU. Just wait until a suitable space becomes available.

Cherryblossomsinspring · 27/08/2015 20:02

I've never not been able to squeeze out of my car even in the smallest of parking spaces and at 40 wks pregnant. At mostrich i would pI'll in a ltitle tighter to the pas saner side for the extra couple of inchess that makes enought of a difference. I think you were being a bit 'special' about your pregnancy but it wasn't great to park over 2 spots.

ShelaghTurner · 27/08/2015 20:03

And yes I can squish to a point but there comes a squishingness that no longer squishes.

As to the OP, I can't bring myself to fuss my arse about things like this. So you had two spaces, not the end of the world.

Original poster
BlueBananas · 27/08/2015 20:04

Gosh Hygge sounds like you've really been through it, so sorry for your loss
And yes that's the issue with my belly, I haven't gained too much width, it's all out in front so I'm very long and have a huge turning circle, maybe the issue is more shape than size
I promise I'm not one of those 'oh my go I'm the first woman in the world to have pregnancy symptoms' women, they get on my enormous tits! I already have 2 DC so I like to think I can handle this pregnancy lark pretty efficiently by now - I've never been this big before though!

OP posts:
Hygge · 27/08/2015 20:12

I've had my moments OP, and thank you for your condolences.

Pregnancy is hard on me, but at least it means I can empathise with other people and try to cut them some slack when they need it.

And it sounds like you needed it today. Flowers

lavenderhoney · 27/08/2015 20:19

Then you need to shop elsewhere or online, or take a friend who can park and you get in and out.

I do sympathise as I was enormous and couldn't sit behind the steering wheel where I needed to be, and reach the pedals without crushing my bump, and had to be chauffeured everywhere from about 30 weeks:)

Also, once I parked miles from the entrance and despite lots of spaces, people parked bang next to me. ( no parent and baby spaces) and was totally blocked in. No way to seat the toddler or force my prgnt self through a tiny gap. A passer by reversed my car out for me.

Other people need to park too, they may also have difficulties and you have to think of them, as well as yourself.

ItsAllGoodMan · 27/08/2015 20:26

People need to relax a bit. Why should you get so angry about someone doing something that makes their life a little easier?

MistressMerryWeather · 27/08/2015 20:43

Meh.

She is probably the same type of person who gets high blood pressure over P&C spaces.

It's not a big deal, you won't be doing it forever.

Just forget about the miserable arsehole

museumum · 27/08/2015 20:48

In the far corner of a non-full varparkbon a weekday? WHO CARES???

MistressMerryWeather · 27/08/2015 20:54

Varparkbon? :o

BreadPitt · 27/08/2015 21:00

People need to relax a bit. Why should you get so angry about someone doing something that makes their life a little easier

Because if everyone was as selfish a 20 space car park would rapidly become a 10 space car park wouldn't it?

MistressMerryWeather · 27/08/2015 21:10

But in reality that would never happen, would it?

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