To kill my husband to death?

[User543212345]

We have guests this week. I bought a jar of Lotus biscuit spread for us to have at breakfasts. I tend to not have it in the house after the jar/spoon incident in the spring but thought that having guests was a lovely excuse for a treat, and wouldn't result in me eating it all like a pig.

"D"H has only gone and given them the fucking jar as a "gift from Sweary" so I look like a loon who gives people jars of biscuit spread and, more importantly, I don't get to have some on toast for breakfast.

WIBU to actually kill the fucker?

Having succumbed to eating nutella from the jar with a spoon (who needs bread?) I am guessing that SwearyGodmother ate said lotus straight from the jar and vowed never to buy it again and give into temptation.

Cross post with NaughtToThreeSadOnions

Naught you win the empty jar as a prize.

I have successfully managed to reclaim the jar without losing much dignity. No killing to death required. Hurrah!

I really want a toast hatch, also a person to constantly deliver toast (savoury toppings only) through it......which wall to butcher??

You can kill him dead but how will that liberate the Lotus spread?

What possessed him to do such a thing! How rude :)

How did you get it back?

I'm still giggling at you being 'a loon who gives people biscuit spread as a present'.

Yabu it's horrible. I was so disappointed I love the biscuits.

I put my big girl pants on and explained DH had misunderstood. That it was bought to share and not for them to take away though they would be welcome to the non existent leftovers. Being direct with a little humour seemed to work

Seriously though, what was he thinking? Giving a jar of readily available supermarket spread as a gift? Where will it stop? Will our next guests (due tomorrow) get a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter?

I've always wanted a toast hatch. We looked at a house last year with one, almost swung it for me

Anyway, if DH gave away my Lotus spread I'd LTB. He'd know better.

Haha! Glad you got it back.. What is it like by the way? I am scared to try it as I tend to have many spoon in jar accidents.. Nutella I'm looking at you.

I bought a jar after reading the rave reviews on MN, and thought it was absolutely vile! Far too sweet sickly gunk (realises we need a MN vom smiley).

Whilse he sleeps stick wax strips to his balls.

MrsTedCrilly yeah, if you have Nutella issues you might wanna stay away, it's glorious

Haha.. These are the times I'm glad I can't drive and the shop is miles away otherwise I'd be in dangerous territory

I have spent waaaayyyy too long today designing Toast Hatches (patent pending).Mine is going to have a chute, you press the emergency toast button (needs a snappier name), the hatch opens and KAPOW! Toast is fired to a desired location accompanied by a Batman figurine bearing an individual portion of delicious preserve.

Next up...The CROISSANT COMMANDER.