To think you should not have to present an appointment letter to get holiday to take DC to hospital?

[MammaTJ]

DP works in a non critical role. Not saying his job is not important, it is in that it provides a roof over our heads. The world is not going to collapse and no one will die if he doesn't go. He would not have been able to have any time off for the previous fortnight as he steps up and does his boss's job when he is away. There were no issues with anyone else being on holiday at the same time.

We had a really important medical appointment for DS the other day, so DP duly booked holiday. This holiday was OK-ed as long as he took in the appointment letter, which I had lost by that point.

I had to ring the hospital and get them to send me another letter. I get that losing it was my fault but really do not understand why a full grown adult would need to take in a letter when they are using holiday time anyway!

Sock it to me, AIBU?

No yanu. I had this. When I once booked holiday at short notice for an appointment, my boss asked for the letter. I told her she could see my letter if it didn't come out of my holiday and was down as special leave (or whatever you call it)

Do they have rules about needing to book holiday so far in advance normally?

This was not even at short notice. I am chaotic but we had known about the appointment for ages, so DP booked it straight away.

If your husband was asking for a half or full day unpaid parental leave for the medical appointment then having to evidence the appointment with a letter might be reasonable.

Employers is very very unreasonable to ask for evidence of what he wants to do on a days leave. He could be going limbo dancing on his day off it's none of his employers business. Perhaps more importantly your DS's medical history is private and none of his father's employer's business.

Thats ridiculous!! You can do whatever you like on annual leave! You dont have to "prove" what you want the day off for. It isnt a sick day or parental leave. It is annual leave, just like if he wanted it off to go play golf!

Penfold, I had not even thought of that aspect. I could maybe get all arsey and protective and refuse to hand the letter to DP to take in.

-but I won't, as it would cause DP more aggro

Was the allowed quota of holiday already booked by other people given the time of year?

If not then yes it does seem a strange request.

Perhaps your DH's employer wants to allow him the day off for medical purposes without taking it as a day's holiday.

No, he really did book it so long ago, that no one else had booked it. His boss (no school age children) has had a fortnight and DP is also having another week. No evidence of activities planned required for that.

No, Random, no chance of that.

We have rules about only x number of people being able to take holiday at the same time or no holiday granted during busy periods. So if an employee wanted holiday for at one of those times we would probably only allow it if they produced an appointment letter etc.

Do you think theyve misunderstood and think DH is taking it as parental leave? Because he mentioned that he is taking the day in order to do the appointment?

No misunderstanding at all. They knew he was taking it as holiday.

This is what happens when you give employers too much knowledge - they use it against you. It was a days leave so no need to say what for. If someone insists you say its something to make them back the feck off: like a smear test !

Not sure they would believe DP was having a smear test, though maybe he could try that.

Mamma I get where your coming from, you'd like to dig your heels in but won't so DH can the day off

Did he not ask why they needed to see it?

Sounds like someone's on a wee power trip or just being petty for the sake of it.

No DoJo he just accepted it and gave me a bit of grief for having lost it.

SurlyCue, yep, this and other reasons why he is looking for another job!

Yeah sounds like a plan.

Anyway, on a more positive note, the hospital appointment was amazing!

Some of you may remember my DS has ptosis, damage to the nerve and muscle of the eyelid. He has had two 'lifts' but they have not been terribly successful. The consultant he had been under referred him to Bristol, warning us they may want to make the good eye match the bad eye. We were very dubious about to all intents and purposes damaging a perfectly good eye, hence us both needing to be there to hear first hand what they had to say.

No mention of damaging the good eye, just and absolute assurance he can improve the bad one.

That's weird - if someone expected me to account for what I was doing on my holiday I would at least question why. Although if he is already sick of working there and just wants a quiet life then I guess he might just be trying to let it all wash over him and avoiding rocking the boat until he can give them the heave-ho!

He is incredibly laidback and it seemed and easy thing to do, so he said he would. I would have questioned why, but I am a gobshite!

I have had to provide written proof on 2 occasions as to why I had missed a shift at work when a child was admitted to A&E & then childrens ward for surgery :( I was not happy, but it is "company policy".

Even more annoyingly my employer promote themselves as ethical & community minded. Bastards.

I understand that though. It was at short notice and possibly really inconvenienced them!