to bloody love living alone in a quiet minimalist flat?

[LeftMyRidingCropInTheMortuary]

I'm 32 and I think I've finally cracked it. I have the lifestyle I want although it is never how I thought things would turn out.

I don't even want to live with a man again. Kids is unlikely to happen for various reason.

I've become increasingly sensitive to noise and mess as I've got older. I work in a stressful people-focussed job and treasure being able to hear myself think when I get home. I am also a control-freak and need to have my environment "just-so".

I have got rid of a lot of "stuff" over the past few years. All my books now on kindle and music on laptop. Everything admin done on-line.

Have I accidentally stumbled on the key to happiness? Peace, space & simplicity?

Or am I secretly kidding myself and want a house full of man, kids, dogs and family stuff?!

Just musing this over whilst my friends socialise tonight and I lie on the couch listening to the swoosh of the dishwasher.

It sounds like my idea of hell, I like my dog, cat, girls with their music and prancing all over and my kitchen with cakes in the oven but I do like it tidy and organised, no paperwork and rubbish everywhere.

But if you really think that's it, you'll be happy to stay like that, then do it

Sounds lovely. I would love it for about a week, then I'd best get back to my shit life.

Yes, living alone is heaven. I'm away at weekends a lot but then I come back to my space, where my things are where I put them, and I love it.

I'm on my own for 6 precious hours today and am up early to savour every single one of them before DP returns later with SS! Jealous OP, I love DP but sometimes I pine for the solitude I used to have when I was single

I used to have a life like yours OP and knew 100% it wasn't what I wanted long term. I think you'd know if you were kidding yourself.

Although I can help thinking it's somewhat of a stealth boast as I survey my cluttered, popcorn covered living room this morning

Well I used to have a minimalist flat in London with DH. We now live in a house in the burbs (in Australia) with two children who create mess and stickiness and crumbs and noise. But I also get told I'm loved about 20 times a day, kissed and cuddled dozens of times and there is always a supply of biscuits.

I was with you until you mentioned the single bed! Strainge and depressing. I hav a similar lifestyle to you but recently went up from a double bed to a kingsize and I bloody love it. Forget sleeping on one side, you obviously haven't been single long enough if you were still doing that! I sleep in the middle, starfish style

Ruby obviously doesn't have teenagers....the biscuits disappear like magic in this house. I'd live to come home and there be some biscuits left!

Morning all!

The bed...well when I still had the double and was on my own, I got confused about the pillows - I had 2 sets of 2 on the bed, IFSWIM. So instead of throwing 2 on the floor and moving "my" 2 into the middle, in order to create less mess, I just lay on "my" side.

Coffin-like. Like Sheldon in Big Bang Theory.

I'm going to ask in Home Decoration if this is a major fauxpas because it does look strange having my little single bed in quite a big bedroom!

Why do people get married a pro create when they love being alone so much?! It's not compulsory you know !

Because liking being alone doesn't = hermit

Not having kids doesn't make you a hermit though?

Interesting place to post such a question, (think the clue is in the web address??) but as pp said, each to their own. Hope you are happy.

Don't be silly redcar, plenty of conversations on here are nothing to do with being a mum, and plenty of posters are not mums or imminently intending on becoming mums.

This is the best general interest website for women in the country.

I loved living alone for more than a decade, though I've never been battered about keeping things minimal and have always liked spreading out by myself in a double bed.

Then I met DH who's also an introvert and a loner so we balance out time together and time doing our own things. Even our only child has inherited a tendency to enjoy her own company. Yes, our house can get gloriously noisy and chaotic and I embrace it but fortunately this is balanced out by peace and quiet when needed.

I count myself lucky in this respect cause I adore having DH and DD in my life.

Bothered not battered

I had to be out all day yesterday for a 40th...I was so glad to get home and not have to talk to people! I mean, we had fun, but it was a party for a friend in another town, so getting there, setting up, receiving guests, making sure she didn't have to do anything etc etc - great fun, but I needed to come home and recharge. She had a fab time which is the main thing.

I was supposed to be doing the last of the decluttering today..... I must admit I'm finding it a bit hard. I'm not trying to be obsessive or Marie Kondo about it but I have had that experience of giving stuff away and then missing it.

The thing is, I literally haven't got much space and clutter sort of slows me down and annoys me. But if I ever do get a bigger place, there's stuff that I will think "why did I chuck that out, only to have to re-buy it or something like it".

for me, there's a balance with minimalism/homeliness and I haven't hit it yet....the woman whose birthday it was yesterday has done really well with her space....it makes me wonder if I am planning mine correctly.

sorry, I'll go and be boring somewhere else now....!

Sounds bliss.

I went and threw my lot in with a hairy, techy bloke who hordes cables and wires and had a couple of kids, though . Too late for me.

Hopefully they'll leave home for uni by the time I'm mid forties and I will then redecorate my house to be all airy and minimalist and confine my DH and his wires to the loft. One can dream...

'and a hoarder of a man who owned lots of ugly technology comprising mangled cables covered in dust'

OMG, I have one of those too. And a house full of clutter. My dh and ds are hoarders, ds gets sentimental about everything and dh belives you never know when something might come in handy.

I would love to get a painter into my house and a carpenter, but dh believes he is brilliant at those already and the house looks dreadful!

OP, can we swap places for a few hours?

clickety are you secretly married to my OH?

There is something about men and cables.
Have y'all seen Michael Mcintyre's sketch about the "man drawer"?

Sorry that you are all jealous of me!
I'm rewatching Gavin & Stacey and the house is clean and ready for the week ahead!

I'm with you on the peace and quiet OP! I have the radio on when I'm doing housework, and will sometimes stream something to watch in the evenings. My TV is nowhere near the arial, and the only time it gets switched on is at the weekends if I fancy a DVD or XBOX marathon.

Minimalist isn't my thing though. Although I'm currently cutting the clutter as my cottage is TINY and I'm busy thinking up how I want to redecorate and what furniture will be needed. On the whole my lifestyle is generally book-cluttered-cottage on the edge of moors, with tiny cottage kitchen stuffed dangerously to the gills with all sorts of shite, but most importantly at this time of year... my jam pan! And the cheese making stuff! Takes up so much room but... cheese!

I do like things-that-require-wires and the tidy hiding of the wires is a bane. I think I should adopt your labeling idea, so when I hoover I know if I'm unplugging the TV, bluray, Xbox, etc.,

And I also have a stinky, troublesome terrier who not only gets on the sofa but has been known to crawl into bed with me when it's cold. Plus a couple of random cats from around here that adopt me for a night or two when it gets cold.

I spent a couple of hours this afternoon with a friend drinking cider and snorting in amusement watching our dogs play with wind fall apples. Not very cosmopolitan or cultured, but I'm at the point of being too old to care (I'm almost thirty FGS!)

Oh and I have a man drawer in kitchen. It's glorious. Some of the shite in there is now antique, I'd sure. The odd forgotten key has nowt on my man drawer

Ooh I'm enjoying this thread (and the similar one about hating social engagements!).

It's like a secret anonymous club for those who prefer being alone to being with others. Ironic!

Hey Border - you may steal my plug-labelling procedure.

Also - I keep a picture of the box when I buy a new lightbulb and write on it "small white lamp, living room" etc. These new lightbulbs confuse me ysee and it helps when replacing them again.