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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

...to think photos of DC on Facebook should be kept to an absolute minimum?

48 replies

Dioskouri · 10/08/2015 09:31

Some of my FB friends post several photos of their DC a day. Photos of them eating/sleeping/playing/using the potty/breathing... Leaving aside the irritation of seeing yet another picture of a baby you are only vaguely connected with and really don't give a toss about, doesn't that child have some privacy rights of his or her own? How will s/he feel in 15 years time when the minutiae of her childhood has been shared with the world and his wife?

I take thousands of pictures of my DC doing all sorts of mundane things but as a general rule I share them only with people close to me. I wonder if that makes me a dinosaur.

OP posts:

LadyLuck81 · 10/08/2015 09:32

Just unfollow the friend then you don't see the pics if it bothers you so much.

EatShitDerek · 10/08/2015 09:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PosterEh · 10/08/2015 09:34

I like seeing what my friend's dcs are getting up to.

Sansarya · 10/08/2015 09:34

Oh FFS, this again? If it bothers you so much OP then unfollow them. God knows I'd rather look at photos of someone's DC than the numerous dead-eyed duckfaced selfies that some people put up.

Justwhy · 10/08/2015 09:35

I can't imagine why any child would care less at 15 to be honest. The photos will be long forgotten. If you don't gove a toss about the persons child then why are you friends with them?

hazeyjane · 10/08/2015 09:36

Just unfollow their posts if they bore/upset you.

I post pictures of my dcs all the time on fb, I don't have hundreds of friends on there, and most of my friends post pictures of their dcs too.

It's no different to handing round the family album of cute baby pics.

coffeeisnectar · 10/08/2015 09:36

As long as the photos are decent (not showing genitals) then who cares?

Fairylea · 10/08/2015 09:36

I have all of 28 people on my Facebook and its completely private. It's more like an online photo album for family and friends to peek at if they want to and safe place for me to store photos so yes I do share a lot of pics.

So what?

I do think people should be aware of the privacy settings on Facebook though. Then at least they're making an informed choice.

m0therofdragons · 10/08/2015 09:36

Well I suppose they could just sit in a photo album on the shelf like when I was younger. Each to their own. My family is close despite living across the world - I'm in the UK with family in Canada, USA and Australia. When we do manage to see each other we're still very close and I put part of that down to keeping each other up to date with dc photos.

Redshoes55 · 10/08/2015 09:39

Do you know any teenagers op?

My 4 lived their lives on fb when young teens and thrn moved into snap chat etc. It would be hilarious to them to suggest they limit their images online.

No one cares.

SaucyJack · 10/08/2015 09:40

It's an interesting point, but you're looking at it from the perspective of a generation who didn't grow up with social media. Our kids are, and I reckon it'll just seem normal to them that there's umpteen pictures of them at the zoo or eating spag bol out there in cyberspace.

And yes, it's fucking boring. One picture of your kid asleep? Cute. One taken every night? Fuck off you narc.

ollieplimsoles · 10/08/2015 09:40

This again.

Op just unfollow if you feel uncomfortable with it.

My stance on this is; yes, it is a violation of a child's privacy to have photos of them shared on the internet, its not like putting them in a family album and getting them out every once in a while.

If your child grows up and wants/needs a certain degree of anonymity, it will be harder for them to have it since their lives are on facebook. They might be a ceo of a big company, a public figure like an actor or singer for example and want a bit of privacy.

WoonerismSpit · 10/08/2015 09:41

I don't share a lot of pictures of DD on Facebook, but I don't have a problem with those who do. I quite like seeing them.

But those saying it's the same as getting out the family photo album, it isn't. Not unless you hand each person who looks at it a copy of the negatives too.

ollieplimsoles · 10/08/2015 09:43

But those saying it's the same as getting out the family photo album, it isn't. Not unless you hand each person who looks at it a copy of the negatives too.

This.

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 10/08/2015 09:47

Nothing on the internet is 'private'. Once it's there, it's there forever. Yes, it may disappear into the background, but never completely. If you're OK with your own pictures of you sat on the toilet, in the bath or running around the garden half starkers to go up online, go right ahead. I don't think it's right at all putting these types of pictures of children up. A few normal pictures and stories, I don't see a problem with, but I've also unfollowed people who have had total 'baby brain', every tiny little thing their child does or says has to be shared for 'hilarity' .

Sansarya · 10/08/2015 09:48

There are photos of Barack Obama as a toddler, on the beach with his grandparents, circulating online. I doubt he is particularly bothered by them!

Sansarya · 10/08/2015 09:50

If you're OK with your own pictures of you sat on the toilet, in the bath or running around the garden half starkers to go up online, go right ahead.

Well obviously these sorts of photos are different but I know very few people who'd put naked shots of their kids on social media.

EatShitDerek · 10/08/2015 09:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ollieplimsoles · 10/08/2015 09:52

Yes- maybe he isn't bothered. He didn't grow up around the time fb was there. So any photos that have been shared online of his childhood have been shared with his adult knowledge.

I'm talking about children who have no choice or say about what their parent's share because they are too young to know what's going on.

WyrdByrd · 10/08/2015 09:57

Sharing pictures is one of the main points of FB, if you don't like it, don't use it or unfollow those you find most aggravating.

I take your point about the child's privacy but if they are tiny they can't make a judgement and it's their parents business to address, not yours.

If they're anything like my DD, who is nearly 11, they will voice an opinion when they are old enough anyway, and then hopefully their parents will respect that.

MrsGentlyBenevolent · 10/08/2015 10:00

Really Sansa? I must have some particular over sharers on my fb, because I've seen many a variation on what I pointed out. I think the parents are quite deluded on the fact that their profile is 'private', for friends and family only, and on the fact they think it's adorable. Then again, same people are the ones who literally have to update on every little thing their kids have done that day, so obviously there's just a 'type' of person out there. It's true, can just unfollow them, but I also think in a few years time, plenty of now-children will find these pictures and not be at all happy. I know I wouldn't be, if Facebook had been around 20-30 odd years ago.

carriebrody · 10/08/2015 10:00

I have about 100 friends on facebook but only share kid photos with about 25 of them.

MidniteScribbler · 10/08/2015 10:03

I think that ANYTHING you put online, whether it be a status, a blog post, a photo, or anything else, should adhere to the same rule: "Would I, or someone else, be offended, upset, hurt or embarrassed if this were printed on a billboard on the highway?".

If the answer is no, then post away.

PolShelby · 10/08/2015 10:05

Tom Hardy's MySpace Derek best ever!

ollieplimsoles · 10/08/2015 10:08

I personally hold this view, its a part of parenting that is a personal choice just like anything else.

I would not tell any other parent what to do with their child, I just wouldn't do this myself.

You can just hide peoples stuff if it annoys you.

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