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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is utterly humiliating

194 replies

merricat · 07/08/2015 00:29

So, I live in a reasonably quiet Scottish village. We moved here two years ago after my husband got a job at [neighbouring city's university].

I know I'm overqualified for normal jobs - I have a PhD - but I want and need a job. Such jobs keep becoming available at our local Co-op shop. I would be fine and good at it, reliable etc. I have no commitments and could work any hours they wanted (which they said was a plus the first time I applied). I have now applied three times for a part time job on the tills. It is getting embarrassing. I will not apply again, but this evening I went in and noticed signs up saying they were recruiting. Every time I go in, the manager makes a point of ignoring me - he has my application on file and I've spoken to him about it previously, but can't keep doing so. I'm here, local, willing, and able. I cannot seem to get this shop job, despite the fact that they've been advertising consistently since I moved here, and despite having my application on file.

What is wrong with me? Why won't they even interview me? What can I do? How can I manage to get a job in a shop?

It's really started to depress me. Whenever I go in there, the manage very concertedly avoids eye contact. It's humiliating!

OP posts:
SamJohnsonsBoy · 08/08/2015 18:53

A shop in our town was constantly advertising for staff and our DS was, like you, always being turned down.

Time passes, the shop closes and the shop manager becomes our SIL.

So DS asks him about it. Apparently the business was going down the pan BUT advertising for new staff gave the illusion that everything was hunky dory.

Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 18:57

*makoy? I meant major! As I said above, I do appreciate that others' experiences may differ.

Have crossposted with a few others and will get on it once I've unloaded the dishwasher... Smile

OP posts:
TheHoneyBadger · 08/08/2015 19:15

blimey - i grew up in the same area and have never encountered anti scottish sentiment when there - jesus corby (in northamptonshire) is little scotland.

TheHoneyBadger · 08/08/2015 19:18

oh and to another - it's a village i doubt they can these tons of applications you're talking about nor is she going into a london high street store on the saturday before christmas and trying to strike up a chat with the staff. don't know how many village stores you frequent but whilst there are peak moments after work or in school lunch hour much of the time there are more staff than customers and they're desperate for a chat to pass the time.

Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 19:19

LazyLohan I don't want to give the impression that I was forever going up to people doing their jobs on the shop floor and demanding attention. Honestly it isn't and wasn't like that. The assistant manager, whom I initially asked for an application form etc (this would be back in maybe January), is someone I've had a chatty relationship with. When I handed my form in, I asked if when she had a spare moment she wouldn't mind reading through it just to check it was okay - this was specifically because she'd offered help earlier, and I'd explained about the PhD and wanted to make sure I'd got over that particular hurdle in my answers. She said (quote) 'THAT is how you fill out an application form', so I left feeling confident. She also emphasised that it was out of her hands, but that she'd put a word in. Since then, I haven't bothered or otherwised distrated anyone from their jobs, expect one occasion of chatting about it on the tills as my groceries were being tallied. And then me asking the manager, the third time I applied, if my application was still on file, and re-explaining that I'm really committed, etc.

Stripey, it wasn't your recounting of experiences, but your generalisations, I suppose. If I were to say 'many English are xenophobic and parochial' based on my experiences of being raised in Northamptonshire villages, I'm sure there'd be hell to pay. It happens that the village I now live in is (perhaps unusally) fairly mixed and welcoming. The only xenophobia I've directly witnessed has come from an English chap complaining about a couple of Polish kids taking his place at the first choice primary school for his son (the village has two primaries). Make of that what you will Hmm

This thread has turned bizarrely into a Scot v. English thing. I neither foresaw nor intended that.

OP posts:
Shakey1500 · 08/08/2015 19:22

merricat I'm with you Smile

I find myself unemployed at present. I've a recent admin (specialised) job under my belt and applied for an easy peasy admin job last wk, as recommended by a pal who works there, had a fab interview and didn't get it. Both pal and I are equally embarrassed.

But WORSE- I have years of retail management under my belt for a fast paced large store. Applied for full time work for the same company I used to be a manager for. And got a "we will not be progressing your application at this time" Shock

Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 19:25

Honey My whole family considered Corby a no-go area for that reason! (I come from a peasant background, if it helps - the Northamptonshire side of my family are small-minded and suspicious of outsiders on a massive scale. My father, on the other hand, was a Scottish left-wing activist!)

OP posts:
Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 19:34

Shakey, sympathies. It's frustrating. Nay, humiliating, to revert to that word. I guess if you have recent admin experience, you're in a slightly better position than me. Keep trying? It sucks, though Flowers

OP posts:
TheHoneyBadger · 08/08/2015 19:48

lol i wouldn't fancy wandering around corby myself but not because they're scottish. i do recognise the racist, homophobic, small minded business just haven't experienced anti scottish sentiment.

curious about what village you grew up in now Grin

lougle · 08/08/2015 20:05

Does the form have a questionnaire that you fill in? The answers to those are not always obvious, so I wonder if you're failing that (if indeed it is a form similar to that of Sainsbury's, etc.)

Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 20:28

Honey it's near Stamford, if that helps? Stamford is Lincolnshire, granted, but wishes it wasn't Grin. There, and also a village near a prominent Northamptonshire fox-hunting stables, was were I was mostly brought up.

lougle there was one of those, yes. I filled it in to the best of my ability - using common sense and what I expected they would think would be good answers. Eg. If a sandwich is noticeably rotting, what do you do: a) sell it to the neearest customer? b) wait to see what happens, c) remove it and inform the manager. Well, I chose c. And similarly sensible answers for simimlar questions.

I think something else that bugs me is that I had no problem getting jobs when I was 19. But now I'm 30, nothing.

OP posts:
Original poster
merricat · 08/08/2015 20:29

*similar

OP posts:
Shakey1500 · 08/08/2015 20:31

Thanks Merri and FWIW I would ask him, in a kind of "Look, I know this might be awkward, but can I just ask..."

For me it would be like an itch that needs scratching. And, you never know, he might change his mind once he's spoken to you and then you can tell him thanks, but I'm not interested now Smile

Anniesaunt · 08/08/2015 20:31

I hit a bad patch job wise at 30. Things have improved since but it did really get me down at the time.

Ragwort · 08/08/2015 20:37

If you have a friendly relationship with the assistant manager is it worth having a word with her along the lines 'I see you are still advertising for X, I have applied previously and am still very interested, if your Manager is not pursuing my application could you perhaps let me know why?'.

Saz12 · 08/08/2015 21:19

It's a minimum wage job? And you're too old to have the lowest minimum wage bracket?
They have applicants with proper retail experience?
They want someone who is involved in local "stuff" (committees etc) for the feel good /loyalty factor?
The manager fancies you?
The manager hates that you have academic bent and s/he is thick as pigshit?

If you live somewhere big enough for 2 primary schools, then can you not just apply to another shop/other - unless it's extreme commuter belt then you live in a town and there've got to be other places to work...?

Binit · 08/08/2015 21:21

Coop is a horrid place to work anyway. [bitter]

MokunMokun · 09/08/2015 00:13

There are plenty of older people working at our Coop in Scotland. Good luck with the application to the other shop and ask for feedback if you don't get it.

maddening · 09/08/2015 00:34

I think either the manager fears you might be one of the few that could take his position, be able to question his authority etc or the not local stance but I reckon a chap in a small town where he is manager of a shop may have issue with a woman who is academically superior to him.

You could find out where he drinks and try and get to know him personally.

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