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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want DH to wear a wedding ring?

81 replies

Elfina · 01/08/2015 22:03

I suspect I am.

He says that wearing it bugs him because of the sensation. I think he'd get used to it if he'd wear one for a decent length of time! He is generally a hit funny about sensory things. I know it shouldn't matter, but I'd love him to!

OP posts:
Sallystyle · 01/08/2015 22:39

I have a tattoo one as I hate wearing rings.

DH doesn't wear one, never did.

WineIsMyMainVice · 01/08/2015 22:40

YANBU. I'd love DH to wear his but he never has....

AdoraBell · 01/08/2015 22:50

YANBU To want him To, but HISNBU To not want To wear one and so YWBU To forcé him To, or vice versa.

As I pointed out To my DH when he casually said he wouldn't be wearing one - no one is obliged To wear a wedding ring. Oddly he decided he really wanted a wedding ring and only takes it off when he washes the car.

treaclesoda · 01/08/2015 22:51

I wouldn't mind dh not wearing one, as long as he was ok with me not wearing one. I was really shocked recently when a friend got in a bit of a flap because she had forgotten to put her wedding ring on before leaving the house. Her dh doesn't wear one but she said he doesn't like her leaving the house without hers. I was Shock

Writerwannabe83 · 01/08/2015 22:53

My DH wears his when he's out the house but then takes it off as soon as he comes home. He says the sensation of it on his finger annoys him Smile

mmmuffins · 01/08/2015 22:53

Jewelry wearing isn't for everyone. I don't wear mine as I find the rings a bit annoying. I try to on special occasions; DH always notices when I do. I doubt he is upset I don't wear them regularly though.

thecheekofthem · 01/08/2015 22:56

what does "

thecheekofthem · 01/08/2015 22:57

sorry

what does "go Ali G" mean?

ouryve · 01/08/2015 22:59

It takes some getting used to.

DH swapped the one we exchanged for a titanium one because he was steadily wrecking his gold one. He rarely remembers to wear one, now. It's no big deal. I sometimes take mine off for days on end if my fingers get swollen or my skin irritated.

YellowBucket · 01/08/2015 23:01

I don't think YABU to wish that he would.
My DH wears his constantly and hates to remove it, even when required. Me? Mine looks like new. I wear it when I remember. I don't even have a finger dent after 16 years
I love knowing how much his ring means to him but I also love that he understands how much wearing jewellery annoys me.

I'm proud to be married to him, I'm just not a natural wearer of rings.

WishIWasWonderwoman · 01/08/2015 23:03

Ah, YANBU to want him too.

But YWBU to force him to wear one.

ouryve · 01/08/2015 23:04

It's a typo/autocorrect gone made, the cheek

Just to add that my rin is really slim with a band no wider than my engagement ring. I couldn't ever comfortably wear anything wider.

toppersocks · 01/08/2015 23:05

I wore my wedding ring for about a year but I stopped as I found it too uncomfortable on my finger. DH wears his all the time and doesn't mind that I don't wear one.

Quietlifenotonyournelly · 01/08/2015 23:09

YABU, my DH doesn't wear one and on the odd occasion when I have been able to remove mine I end up not wearing it for a long time, once for a whole year nearly. It doesn't make you any less married, it's just a symbol.

ThroughThickAndThin01 · 01/08/2015 23:12

I think it's a nice thing to do. Dh didn't have one when we got married and I didn't care either way. As the years went by he decided he did want to wear one, so I got him one for our 10th wedding anniversary. He loves wearing it, and I have to say I love him wearing it. It means me!

I really notice now which men wear wedding rings.

trufflesnout · 01/08/2015 23:19

Depends. If you took yours off and your DH got upset about it then I think there'd be an issue.

PtolemysNeedle · 01/08/2015 23:19

YANBU. It's one of those things that I know really doesn't matter, but in all honesty, I was happy that my DH chose to wear a ring, so it follows that I might well have felt temporarily disappointed if he hadn't wanted to.

As it is, I often wear my DHs ring because he died, and in the shittiest way possible, it's nice to have. Sadwidow, I'm sorry you have to wear your DHs ring too. Flowers

molyholy · 01/08/2015 23:28

Dh wears his, but I have never worn mine. Or my engagement ring. I wear no jewellery whatsoever. Never have. No earrings, no necklace. Nada. In fact my sister used to think it was hilarious to see me in my rings I wore it when they were new but never felt comfortable in it. Not once has dh mentioned it as he knows I'm not a jewellery person. Its up to the individual so I think yabu. Sorry op.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 01/08/2015 23:45

You could do what my SIL did. She wouldn't change her name unless DBro wore a ring. Grin Both sides happy with the outcome.

DH stopped wearing his ring a few years ago. He has never gone back to it. Mind you he stopped wearing ALL jewellry at the same time so it is not just a wedding ring thing.

AdeleDazeem · 02/08/2015 00:22

I don't think you are being unreasonable. My DH doesn't wear his either as he doesn't like wearing jewellery. He wears it for special occasions though.

I'd love him to wear it all the time but he finds it uncomfortable. I never push him to wear it of course, I would just like if he wore it. But he doesn't - NBD really, we're still just as married as a ringed couple.

LosingTheWillToSkate · 02/08/2015 01:44

We have rings but neither of us wear them. We can't really for work, and neither of us are into jewellery.

Occasionally one of us will put it on for something random I guess.

ScoutRifle · 02/08/2015 07:23

The ring is a sign of your love & commitment so it's no wonder it bothers you op. It would bother me too but my husband only takes his off for work (engineer so a requirement not choice) and he was frantic when he misplaced it once.

BeautifulBatman · 02/08/2015 07:29

Yanbu. I wouldn't like it if my dh didn't wear his. Happily for me he does, he only takes it off when we go to bed. I don't think he'd like it much if I didn't wear mine either. But I never take mine off anyway. Don't see the point in exchanging rings in a ceremony if you're not going to wear it after.

CognitiveIllusion · 02/08/2015 07:30

When we got married DH said he wasn't sure about wearing a ring. I said it was his decision, but I made it clear that I would prefer him to - I don't think that is unreasonable. He got one in the end and always wears it.

BumpTheElephant · 02/08/2015 07:37

YABU. I don't wear one, DH does.
I hate the feel of it on my finger and I never wear any jewellery.
I also became allergic to my first wedding ring (nickel allergy) and the titanium replacement is too big and bulky.