To feel jealous of friend

[Meanjealousmate]

I have name changed as I am embarrassed to admit how jealous I am of my friend.

We were best friends at school and then at university she met a medical student. She is now happily married to a successful doctor and they live in a huge beautiful home with two gorgeous little girls and she is a sahm and always looks like she's doing exciting and fun filled trips and lovely holidays, perfect haircuts and expensive makeup.

In contrast I have a rubbish job and poky flat and no time to meet anyone!

I know I'm BU but I get so sad and jealous of her life!

YANBU OP. Can I just ask how old you are? You never know you might meet your doctor yet!

Not exactly related to your situation but I recall a party when I was about 20 and newly single. Spent the whole night seeing everyone in loved up couples and feeling sad. Spoke to a friend a few days later who had been at same party with her long term boyfriend. She spent the whole party feeling boring tied down and middle aged, surrounded by single people flirting and having fun with endless possibilities open to them. Same party, greener grass on both sides!

Yes. I think. Sitting on her arse all day. If she were a single mum not put working people would be quick to call her a scrounger.

Out working. Not put working

It's natural to feel jealous occasionally I think, would be surprised if anyone could say they hadn't been jealous of someone else at some point.

The saying I try to heed is "the grass is greenest where you water it". Rather than focussing your energies on the how unfair it is etc, make changes to your own life! Isn't always easy though.

A good friend should be please for their friend's go of fortune. Some people spend too much time counting other people's blessings instead of their own. Unfortunately if you are envious of other people if often shines through and you are seen as less of a friend. If you envious of other pople try instead to improve and area of your life. People often see the regards eg : the big salary but not the effort that went into going to get it.

To me, what is important here is your dissatisfaction with your own life.

It sounds like you aren't married yet or have children, as well as being university educated, you are in a wonderful position to rethink your life and decide where you want your life to be going. Nobody can plan for falling in love with the right man, but so much else is totally under your control.

I agree with Murdermystery - People often spend too much time focussing on the fortune of others , rather than appreciating their own fortune.
I don't envy others because I am happy within myself.
If there is something I am not happy about, I try to make changes.

OP. I have two under fives and a demanding job. I get around five hours sleep a night. I am a lone parent because my husband died.

I'm MAKING time to meet ppl. It's boderline impossible but the alternative is dying alone. No thanks. Unless you work 24/7 then you have time to meet ppl.

For all you know OP she's jealous of you because you get to talk to adults all day not children, because you can have a coffee in peace, go to the loo in peace, can have a lie in and don't have to involve anyone else in your decision making about what to have for dinner or what to watch on TV.

If you don't like your life then change it. Make a plan, follow the steps.

If you are single and child free there's very little to hold you back - the world is your oyster.