...to wonder why some people treat sales assistants badly?

[98percentchocolate]

I've worked in retail for about 10 years off and on (through uni) and now work a couple of hours a week whilst I'm a SAHM.

I'm always polite and friendly, and most people are lovely, but occasionally I have some...memorable... Moments.

This week somebody threw something at my face because they tried to queue jump and I wouldn't serve them first. I was very nice about it and very apologetic but still had something thrown at me.

I've also been called "stupid" and "thick" (I'm really not), have had people refuse to speak to me AT ALL (happens very often actually), snatching, snapping...

I'm not alone either, it happens very often. I've seen people physically assault my colleagues before over the smallest things.

So really, I'm just wondering what sparks it? I'm sure nobody will actually admit to being somebody that would throw something at a sales assistant, but I'm just really interested in the psychology behind it.

It is how you tell a nice person from a not nice person.
Nice people treat everyone politely and pleasantly.
Not nice people are selective in who they treat politely and pleasantly.

Midnite what a lovely story - especially what you have done with the bracelet.

I dunno, I think sometimes people have bad days. I will confess to having been a bit grumpy with sales assistants in the past. I have never thrown anything, called anyone names or anything like that, however having been on the receiving end of really bad customer service, been really fed up and time short, I have been arsey i'm sure. I'm not a horrible person generally, 99% of the time I am cheerful, polite and have a little small talk or joke with them, however 1% of the time it happens.

Because they like having someone that they perceive as beneath them and serving them I expect.
I really enjoyed my time in retail and would do it again (apart from Christmas - that really sucked!) despite the odd round of abuse and arsehole customers. The good mostly outweighed the bad and the general public are on the whole a nice bunch.
Wouldn't do GP reception work again though. Got death threats in that one because the doctor wasn't actually onsite when the patient demanded a PX immediately...

I worked in retail for a number of years for different big names and I would say about 95% of customers were nice and the other 5% should be ashamed of themselves.
I was in a restaurant with my DH a while back and there was this lady bitch being really rude to a member of staff as they had placed the bill nearest her so was saying something like 'you stupid girl, I'm a woman I don't pay, where are your manners' blah blah. Anyway, the gentleman with her long suffering dh got up to use the bathroom and on the way past the poor member of staff we saw him slip her a £20, we couldn't hear what he said to her but was probably along the lines of, ' excuse my rude wife'. Made me smile but felt sorry for her DH if he's doing that every time they go out.

I used to work at mcdonalds and copped a lot of verbal abuse over my eight years. It was in an Italian area and I became very familiar with Italian swear words.

I got to the point where nothing bothered me or phased me unless they started on my girls

Some people are so inadequate that they have to pass their crappy feelings into others. Other people are so thick that they don't realise that retail workers don't actually make the rules/order the product lines/decree when promotions start etc. I worked in retail to put myself through uni and would never take out my bad mood or frustrations on a shop assistant. It's hard work for little reward without having to deal with tossers every other customer.

To answer your question OP, it's because they're cunts.

Until you've worked in retail you can never truley realise just how rude and unpleasant members of the General public can be. People are just vile and I recognise a lot of these comments on here, in particular the "ruining Christmas" thing. That was a common one when I worked at Argos, people leaving it until Christmas Eve to buy their childs presents then taking it out on the staff when we didn't have stock left, well no actually you have ruined your childs Christmas by leaving it until the day before Xmas to buy their presents. Idiots

Another time I helped a customer carry a very heavy box out to their car in the pouring rain and didn't even get a Thank You.

I do think these people have obviously never worked in service and just don't know how to to treat people they see as beneath them. I concur that middle class types are always ruder than any other group of people, I also used to find that older people were ruder than teenagers.

Strike out fail

I've worked a lot in retail in my younger years. I think it's great training for life! I've worked in Blockbuster video (remember them?), Rymans, ASDA and Waterstones for many years.

I believe people take out their own stress and anger on shop assistants because they genuinely believe they are 'lower' than them.

Going back nearly 20 years, the Rymans I worked in was in Central London and lunchtimes were the absolute worst for abuse. The stressed out city workers (who had probably just been shouted at by their boss) used to come in and buy endless stamps and Filofax fillers. They would shout the worst abuse over the most minor things. My fellow (more experienced) colleague taught me to smile and nod and refuse to serve until they talked politely, this used to make them more mad.

In blockbuster video I had people throw heavy video cases at me at full pelt after I had to refuse them a rental because they had lots of late fees to pay on older rentals. I was very adept at ducking.

The worst was Waterstones - people certainly had an air if superiority - as if you can barely read yourself. The irony is I worked with published authors, MA and PHD students, and people who are now heading up important positions at publishing houses.
A lot of people were lovely. That's what made it worthwhile, but we were never short of complete arseholes.

Most customers are lovely but sometimes you are unfortunate enough to encounter a complete arsehole. I've had things thrown at me,been spat at,verbally abused as have most of my colleagues. One very nasty incident happened to one of my colleagues who was at the till behind me. She was scanning her customers groceries,chatting about what a lovely day it was when he leaned into her face and said if I had to work here I would kill myself. Have you ever thought about it. I bet you have.
Luckily one of the security staff was nearby and she escourted and banned him from the store.

After working in hospitality and retail I find my stereotypes are groups or mums with young children. I've been left to clean up vomit, wee and furniture ruined by their children with not even a sheepish apology.
Older ladies were also very rude. I can understand how people can get frustrated when they have had bad service but some people are quite simply not nice.
I go out with my mum who actually volunteers in a charity shop and she is so short at times, no pleases or thank yous, she doesn't mean anything but we just end up arguing when I point out pleases and thank yous make that little difference.
Actually as a waitress with a little child at home one man asked for something without saying please, I automatically said 'what's the magic word' (as I was teaching ds) and he looked sheepish and said please!

Silverturnip my sister does that and won't serve until they use manners. I also used to wave back if a customer was waving me over then walk off to giggle to myself.

Worked retail for 5 years when I was a student, 4 years of that was in a video game store in a shopping centre in a rough area of Dublin. Worst thing that happened was that someone grabbed my work shirt by the neck and tried to pull me over the counter after I refused to take a pile of Xbox games that were absolutely scratched to bits as a trade-in. I was transferred to a branch in a much nicer area after that one after I kicked up a bit of a fuss with management.

I have been told countless times that I ruined Christmas on people either because we were sold out of the latest and greatest game on Christmas Eve or because through no fault of anyone (apart from MS/Sony/Nintendo) hardware had an issue out of the box.

Unfortunately, some people are arseholes.

I also used to wave back if a customer was waving me over then walk off to giggle to myself

I wish I'd thought of doing things like that!

I'm really lucky where I work now, as my manager will not take shit and will stand up for us if needed. In previous jobs, they haven't, one would literally slink off if there was any trouble but later tell us what we should have done.

Recently a couple came in, and she tried on literally every ring in the store ( jewellery shop). Her bored partner then asked me to show him a watch. I then got yelled at for trying to steal her boyfriend, as I apparently was jealous of her that he could afford to shop there. My manger appeared and told her she was lucky enough to have been granted access as she looked like a tramp and had security throw them out.

15 years in retail...the last 10 running my own business.

Those first 5 years were hell, having to mind my behaviour because I was employed by other people. It made me determined to treat my staff well, and not let them be subjected to crap from customers.
I had an older family member work in my shop on a Saturday while I was running an stall elsewhere. A customer (a regular but always awkward one) said to him 'that girl you employ in the week is rude. you should sack her'...apparently her face was a picture when he responded 'girl? um..oh you mean my boss. Yes she owns the company'

I put up with a lot, I bent over backwards for some of the more difficult customers because it's just what you do.
I did have one customer walk round the shop repeatedly saying things were cheaper at the garden centre....so I said 'well go to the garden centre then and stop wasting my time. I have other customers who actually want to purchase stuff'....she was back a few days later, because in fact I was cheaper. It's churlish but I refused to serve her - she had been SO rude to me.
Threw a customer out for being racist about the trader next door....

I am now that person in the queue who berates other customers for treating retail staff badly.

I have worked in customer facing roles but from a customer point of view, it is very frustrating when sales staff are rude or ignorant as is the case with some shops. Not saying that excuses any of the behaviour of course.

If I have an issue with someone in a shop I complain to the manager though, rather than kick off.

Because they have never worked in retail themselves and are total arses

Working in retail at Christmas time is the 7th circle of hell. Between the endless Christmas musak, and a ramping up of unreasonable behaviour from customers it is horrendous.

DH has always worked in retail. He started out at Harrod's and said the sale was the worst time and the absolute worst department was crockery. He says staff would be rotated because no one could stand more than a few hours.

People would be so crazed they'd knock stuff over in their rush. Worse than them were people who'd fight over things and throw crockery. He saw someone who'd lost out the last gravy boat in a particular pattern deliberately smash all their rival's dinner plates.

Apparently the shoe department was quite bad for abuse too as well as skanky feet.

He warned me never to leave my own shoes on the floor while I looked at a new pair in the mirror. People steal them and he dealt with far too many barefoot women who'd trundled round the floor looking for their shoes before coming to him and asking if they'd been tidied away. He'd have to break it to them that they'd been pinched. It makes sense I suppose. If you're buying shoes in Harrod's you're probably wearing expensive shoes in the first place.

Now he has his own shop he won't open on Christmas Eve and reopens on the first Monday after Christmas, as long as it's not Boxing Day. He won't open on New Year's Eve and reopens on the 2nd as long as it's not a Sunday.

He says it's awful working in a shop on Christmas Eve. Some abuse but lots of people who are friendly - and often pissed - who've left present-buying till the last minute like about 4 or 5pm and don't know what they want. He says things bought on that day are often returned in the new year. As it is, he still gets returns and long as they're unworn he'll take them back, but says opening on Christmas Eve is a complete waste of time.

Most of his customers these days are nice though and many have become friends. I like the women who come in at Christmas or birthdays for their husbands and say: 'You know what he likes. You choose and I'll just pay.'

endless Christmas musak

That's bad enough as a customer Tread. What it must be like to work there...

I was in a long line at a Tesco checkout and they were selling Santa toys where if you pressed his belly he said: 'Yo, ho, ho.' Every single customer did it.

When it was my turn I didn't press and said to the woman: 'That would drive me mad'. She agreed but said she couldn't remove it or break it because she was right under a security camera.

It amazes me how rude people can be. Even if they don't have any common courtesy or empathy, what about self-preservation?

Waiting staff and shop assistants have a huge amount of power, should they wish to exercise it.

At a hotel where a man had been leering over my (under 18) female colleagues and touching them up and generally be horrible and rude when we all called him out on it, I sent all his luggage to Canada. He was in fact going to Bracknell. When the airport freight van came for a load of other cases, I just added the labels to his too. He was furious.

Another good one is ringing their credit card issuer as a 'concerned merchant.' Say you think their card is stolen, lots of headaches for them when their card is cancelled / frozen.

Another if they're business travellers is complaining to their company and saying their company is blacklisted from booking rooms and functions again. I got a lovely apology letter and hamper from one firm for that after their employees thought it would be funny to poo in wine cooler.

Another is changing menu options to vegetarian all the way through their stay (some men see it as wimpy not to have steak and a mushroom risotto is a poor substitute).

Be polite or we'll get our revenge. I like to think I was craftier than spitting in food, and more inventive. I did however once dip my balls in the pint of man who called me a 'fucking retard' because we didn't sell the brand of lager he wanted. My low point there.

Silentcharisma very inventive revenge stories. Love the 'concerned merchant' one.

I too have served my time in retail/hospitality and other customer services roles. Lots of memories!!