To think that a 2 year old shouldn't be able to get outside by themselves at soft play?!

[MeowImaCatfish]

2yo ds is at a soft play birthday party. It's pissing down outside and the soft play entrance has locks that you have to press a button for the door to open iyswim? So how tf does a shoeless toddler get outside without anyone frigging noticing??
Ps, I feel guilty for not knowing where he was but I looked away for literally 3 minutes and as far as I knew he was still in the upstairs of the play area. If I hadn't got up to see if I could get a decent photo he would have got soaked... AIBU to think someone should have noticed him running outside or what??

I bet you got a shock, glad he is ok.

I used to follow mine around at soft play at that age.......just it keep them in sight not to ruin their fun but if they design these places so that they can make a great escape I'm pleased now that I did.

Yanbu.
If these places just had one, properly secure, door in and out, soft play places would be a much more relaxed place for everyone. Then they could ban parents crawling through tunnels following their pfbs, and everyone would be happier.

They have to have fire exits though

True. But they're normally too heavy for toddlers plus set off alarms.

They usually do just have one door but unless you are letting people in and out through a double door system like a prison there will always be a risk a tot might sneak out.

I don't think here is a parent in the land who hasn't experienced a heart stopping moment like this with a small child. It is horrible but most of these children have not come to any harm. It takes nerves of steel to be a parent!

And depending on the layout there may well be access to kitchen.

not meaning to sound ridiculous but if they serve food and the hatch is left open because someone was carrying through an order...

then there the toilets. ..

or maybe the party areas....

its never just about getting outside there are other places they could end up within the building.

Oh phew it's not just me then - I tend to follow around too. Mostly to witness potential altercations with other children to be fair .. Soft play is a bit unruly!

I'm willing to bet there will be a sign on the entrance saying your children must be supervised at all times, the onus really falls on you op

Put it behind you and watch him like a hawk next time

bitta me too. If Dd goes out of eye shot I go see.

Goodness you poor thing every Horrible scenario must have been running through your mind But with the greatest respect, op. You as his mother did not even notice he was gone. So a stranger possibly harrarased with their own kids ect could be forgiven for not noticing your DS had got out. If you're not looking for someOne you don't always notice them. I am certain they would have stopped him had they seen him.
You say you only looked away for 3 minutes. Anything can happen in that time.
With a little baby.

I expect the most likely thing is that he tagged onto a group with an adult and got out that way. The staff would probably assume he was with the adult.

DS1 tried to leave a soft play place with a group of children on a nursery trip once because he'd been making friends with the children. He was most put out when I said he had to stay in the soft play with me.

And another time at soft play, DS1 tripped, fell flat on his face and started wailing loudly. While I was comforting him and checking him over, DS2 (18 months old at the time) went over to the outside door. I looked over just in time to see DS2 exiting the soft play alone as an adult held the door open for him

ducky
Don't be so unnecessarily harsh.
Oh, and if you had read properly - you'd have observed op has a son.

You get a kick out of being an insensitive twat ducky?

It was a family birthday so had 10+ relatives there, and did say I was going to get a drink to ds' aunt so assumed she would look out for him til I got back.. But the play areas like from 1 wall all the way to the other wall with 1 entrance/exit at the front, so the only way you can see anyone inside is by looking through the 1 mesh wall if that makes sense? ducky thanks for that. I already felt guilty enough without you making me feel worse, so no offence but if you can't say anything nice (as in constructive criticism) the kindly sod off.

Ducky o hope that you never male a parenting mistake. It must be wonderful being such a perfect parent perhaps you should write a book so the rest of us can benefit from your incredible wisdom.

Op it's an easy mistake. The same very nearly happenedto dd when she was 2. Next time you'll watch so much more closely

Tbh it is your responsibility. I have taken mine to soft play and always make sure they're with me when I go for a drink or to the toilet. My ds is 5 so I'm a bit more relaxed about him but keep my 3 year old within eye shot.

It's just bad luck OP. It's hard when you're not a 'perfect parent. My sister and I lost her three year old in Marc-De-Pre Primark once. We were each standing on opposite sides of a clothes rail and he was running between us. She asked if I had him and I thought she had him. Massive panic, security looking, then someone noticed people laughing in the window. Wee skitter was pretending to be a dummy in the window display.

I own a soft play. Security and safety is a priority and the door is manned. But ultimately we do have a sign on our entrance, as is a requirement anyway by our insurance company, that children remain the responsibility of the parents or carers at all times.

I sympathise, OP, but I'm not sure the softplay or anyone else is at fault here. I remember being scared something similar would happen with DD when she was 2 and I was stuck in the seating area with newborn DS. It's discomforting when you can't see them but lots of parents don't have a realistic alternative at these places. I try to avoid them, tbh, but they can be a godsend when you're trying to occupy a toddler on a few hours' sleep or less.

Children can and do sometimes escape from places they shouldn't. Throwing around charming pointers like 'being a crap parent' and 'sort your life out' only serve to make the poster feel superior.
Our local soft play has a gate that needs to be unlocked by a member of staff using a button that's out of a child's reach - only then can they access the main door - and still I've seen a child being returned by a parent who has been cheerfully followed out by one too many children.
Getting a drink and taking your eyes off your child for a minute or so is not a crime despite what other people would have you believe. Children are little houdinis and sometimes we take our eye off the ball.

Tbf if you didn't notice your child going outside why should anyone else. I'm sure it was pretty scary for you so just use it as a learning curve. 2 yr olds can be little Houdinis so don't take your eyes of them. Even if you think they're safe! Mine could get out of anywhere!

To all those who follow their two year old around - how would you manage this if you also had a newborn/twin/other small child (many people will be in this scenario).
Sometimes you can't watch one kid every second, so I agree with the op that it would be nice if other parents make an effort not to let other peoples two year olds out of a child-safety door.

I recall a time a friend and I were in the park pushing our babies on swings and she saw an elderly man holding the gate for her 2 year old to leave the park!!

Ducky is being unnecessarily rude but I have to admit my thought was that the lesson here is that 3 minutes is too long to take your eyes off. I don't think I ever got a drink at soft play until I could make mine stand next to me while I did it
ie bribe him with his own juice.

Also you can't ever assume someone else is watching unless you actually specifically ask them too imo.