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My son wants to wear a skirt.

42 replies

Thebestusernamesaretaken · 17/07/2015 13:50

My son is 5 and has recently told me he doesn't want to be a boy any more, he wants to be a girl! He has gone as far as pointing out school skirts in asda and saying he wants to wear one to school. I draw the line at that but wibu to let him have a non school skirt?

OP posts:

waffilyversati1e · 17/07/2015 13:53

I haven't been in this situation so can only guess at how I would feel in your shoes but my gut says yes, do it. The skirt is not important, his individuality and feeling of being safe to be what he wants to be (even at 5) is.


HedgehogAtHome · 17/07/2015 13:56

When I was his age I was insisting on wearing trousers. Grin Mother had to argue with the school.

Did me no harm. I wanted to 'be' a boy. Quite happy as a grown woman now, just seemed the only way into the other side of the gender stereotype as I wasn't happy with the side I was on.


Thebestusernamesaretaken · 17/07/2015 13:57

It doesn't worry me and I'm happy for him to do so but I didn't know if it would generally been seen as acceptable. )Particularly as my abusive ex is extremely homophobic)

OP posts:

TheCountessofFitzdotterel · 17/07/2015 13:58

Yes, let the kid have a skirt.


TrueBlueYorkshire · 17/07/2015 14:02

Without mixing things like gender and sexuality into the equation one of the things as a parent you should be doing is showing your son social norms.

While a boy may wear a skirt etc it is up to yourself to decide what social normals you want your son to be raised to.


TheWernethWife · 17/07/2015 14:04

You could always buy him a kilt - men/boys look very handsome in them.


RiverTam · 17/07/2015 14:07

But surely you can do bith? I have taught DD that boys can wear a dress or skirt (just as she can wear trousers) but that it's more usual for them not too. So she knows the social norm but she also knows that not everyone has to conform to it.

OP, what about done dressing up stuff?


hellhasnofurylikeahungrywoman · 17/07/2015 14:07

My son is in his 20s now but as a small child he wanted to wear skirts, tutus and ribbons in his hair so he did. I have never quite understood why it is acceptable, in our society, for girls to wear trousers and shorts but it isn't acceptable for boys to wear skirts?


WorraLiberty · 17/07/2015 14:07

If these threads get any more common, boys will start to rebel and actually want to wear trousers just to be different! Grin


leedy · 17/07/2015 14:07

I'd let him wear the skirt, to be honest. One of my friend's (identical) male preschooler twins is a big fan of more "girly" stories, etc. and occasionally goes out in a princess dress over his jeans, while his bro is in more classic male garb. May be a phase, may not be, nobody makes a fuss about it.

Also, as a PP said, kilts are unisex.


itaintmebabe · 17/07/2015 14:07

I've got 2 boys, 5 yo and 9 yo, and I e have always let them wear skirts or dresses if they have wanted to. It hasn't been that often though and my eldest wouldn't dream of doing it anymore. I just don't want them restricted by gender, society will "teach" them soon enough anyway.


saturnvista · 17/07/2015 14:10

For his sake, unless this turns out to be a major issue, I would compromise with a kilt.


CallMeExhausted · 17/07/2015 14:10

I was about to say that my DH wears a kilt and looks fine in it, if I say so myself

If the school will be a struggle, get him a kilt from a charity shop for non school hours. If gender identity issues are legitimately on the horizon, at least you'll not be shaming DS now...


AuntieStella · 17/07/2015 14:16

When they're only 5, it's hard to know whether there's anything more to 'I want to be a girl' than there is to 'I want to be zebra/walrus/spaceman/alien/wizard'.

Let him have the skirt.


MogTheForgetfulCat · 17/07/2015 17:56

My Ds is 7 and has 2 dresses and 2 nighties. He asked a few months ago (just turned 7, I think) and at the moment he wears them mostly at home. He has worn them when friends from school come round (or when his older brother has friends round) and as far as I know this has never (yet) been an issue or resulted in any unkindness or teasing.

Don't know if it's a phase. He has always liked pretty, sparkly, lovely things, and I think for him at this point it's as simple as girls' clothes are nicer and prettier than boys' clothes. He hasn't ever said he wants to be a girl. I would get your DS a skirt Smile.


FirstWeTakeManhattan · 17/07/2015 18:07

When they're only 5, it's hard to know whether there's anything more to 'I want to be a girl' than there is to 'I want to be zebra/walrus/spaceman/alien/wizard

Absolutely agree with this. He's five - it's not an issue at all. My DS, 5 wants to wear blue nail varnish, because his friend (also boy) does. He occasionally wants to dress up as Princess Jasmine. Let him have the skirt, he'll enjoy it, and probably move on from it very soon, if my DC's attention span is anything to go by.


cailindana · 17/07/2015 18:11

My 4 year old wears a dress now and again. I can't see how it's any different to wearing any other clothes really - what could be 'unacceptable' about it?


YouBastardSockBalls · 17/07/2015 18:12

He'll be teased.


Fatmomma99 · 17/07/2015 18:12

I don't see anything wrong with it.

And whether it's a phase or an indication of how he's going to want to be in the future, it's it better/nicer/kinder to go with it and support him.

If he wants to wear skirts at 20+ what you would or wouldn't allow at 5 won't make a difference to whether he does or not.
But you can help how he feels about himself.


cailindana · 17/07/2015 18:13

Is that a reason not to allow him to do it SockBalls?


RachelRagged · 17/07/2015 18:14

Meh , let him have the skirt.

My sons have never asked for skirts or bras but my youngest did go through a phase of wearing my nightie or bra even, while his DB liked to wear a jumper of mine or a T Shirt for a short while.

None of them wear such anymore .


TheHouseOnBellSt · 17/07/2015 18:19

Things are changing. Will Smith's son Jayden wears one quite often.

My son wants to wear a skirt.

TheHouseOnBellSt · 17/07/2015 18:20

And another....he wore one to prom too.

My son wants to wear a skirt.

glamourousgranny42 · 17/07/2015 18:21

"He'll be teased"
Well deal with the ignorant people that tease him then. I hate it when people trot out the line that any child who is different in any way should conform because of
the possibilty of teasing. How about we bring our children up to be tolerant and celebrate difference. My children wouldnt tease a boy in a dress, or a child with gay parents or who was overweight or mixed race or disabled. Its not inevitable ffs


Thebestusernamesaretaken · 17/07/2015 18:25

Took him I to asda this afternoon, he decided he didn't want a skirt, he wants a school dress. He didn't get one as I have no idea how the school would view that (and there's only 3 days left) he got a car instead!

OP posts:
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