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AIBU?

For being miffed that someone thought I looked older than my age...!

46 replies

MyRealNamesBernard · 15/07/2015 13:31

I took my DC to her friend's house for a play, and the child's mum and I were having a cup of tea together. Anyway, out of the blue she asked me how old I was. So I told her. And she replied: "Wow..... I thought you were MUCH older!"

I didn't know how to respond.

And then she asked if I would ever consider botox.

So, I replied, that I had never, ever considered botox, but after that bombshell, I clearly needed to reconsider....

AIBU? Or is it rude to tell someone they look older than they are? BTW, I am in my thirties - not 15. If I was 15 and she'd made that comment, I would obviously have been thrilled!

OP posts:
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JessiePinkMan · 15/07/2015 13:33

Whaaat? That's so rude. I find people who comment on other people's age (especially telling someone they look older) usually have issues about age themselves. Take no notice & next time say 'did you mean to be so rude' Smile

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MagicMojito · 15/07/2015 13:44

Shock Good God, And I thought I had bad social skills!

No yanbu at all. Even if it was true (not saying it is BTW) who the bloody hell says that to somebody anyway?!

I'm sure you look fine OP, take it with a pinch of salt.

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paulapompom · 15/07/2015 13:50

Rude!!!! You could say ' I thought you were a cunt.... and you are. '
Is that an over reaction? I don't like being told I look old(er) Grin

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DoJo · 15/07/2015 14:13

That is massively rude, but the follow-up makes me think she has a vested interest in trying to get you to have botox - perhaps a 2 for 1 deal or she's an agent or similar? Because it's a weird thing to come out with (for an adult who should know better) and it's a particularly odd thing to suggest injecting your face to counter it.

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Nurserywindow · 15/07/2015 14:15

Well, she doesn't sound the brightest, so her judgment is probably not the best either.

My niece was amazed to discover that I was the younger sister in my family. However, she's only 7 so I'll forgive her Smile.

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DadfromUncle · 15/07/2015 14:17

Everyone thinks I'm older than I am - always has, I've got used to it. The upside is I'm less concerned about how old I look than these folk who say "people always say I look MUCH younger than I am".

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Blazing88 · 15/07/2015 14:20

Look on the brightside. You'll probably always look the age you look Grin

Thinking of a girl at school who looked 35 when she was 16. She still looks 35. She's 41 now! Grin

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maz210 · 15/07/2015 14:24

Ignore her OP, she sounds like she's either bitchy or extremely lacking in social skills.

I must admit I was once slightly peeved when a workman assumed I was my colleague's mum. Said colleague is 18 months older than me and we're both in our mid-thirties.

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DowntownFunk · 15/07/2015 14:48

Rude moo.

One of DH's friend's wife used to make a massive deal about me being older. She asked my age and said oh I thought you were the same age as your DH (3 years older). She still made quips, some rather rude ones, about my age. It turns out she's exactly a year younger than me and we are in our forties. She's gone through the menopause though so I reckon she was projecting her own issues on to me. I unfriended her on FB after another unnecessary jibe and all hell broke loose.

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Shakey1500 · 15/07/2015 14:51

If it's any consolation, a guest at my sister's wedding (my sister is 50, I'm 45) asked if I was the bride's mother.

And, recently I met a friend of a friend who asked if I was (my friend's) sister. My friend is 70.

Angry

I swear I don't look old for my age.

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EeyoresTail · 15/07/2015 14:56

I was at a party of my DD's friend from school. I was helping the mother of the birthday child set up as she had got into the hall late. Later on a mother of another child at the party asked if I was the birthday child's mother's mother (I.e DGM) I hope it was just because she saw me helping and assumed I was family rather than I was looking particularly haggard Shock

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Shakey1500 · 15/07/2015 14:59

Proof I don't look old enough to be a 50 year old's mother. At least I think I don't and if anyone says otherwise there'll be repercussions Wink

For being miffed that someone thought I looked older than my age...!
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Tophat90 · 15/07/2015 15:14

Looking gorgeous Shakey!

Love the dungarees. Don't think I could pull those off, and I'm in my twenties Smile.

OP, this women sounds like a nutter. Ignore.

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JessiePinkMan · 15/07/2015 17:05

I hope I look that good at 45 shakey
As a pp said, it's projection

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Tryharder · 15/07/2015 17:18

My first thought was: she's selling Botox

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spottybottycream · 15/07/2015 17:37

I put my foot in it once with a woman at work, turns out she is only a couple of years older than me (34). And was telling me how a hotel receptionist had mistaken her and her younger sister for mother and daughter. She showed me a photograph of the two of them together and i said well, perhaps its because there's clearly a big age difference between the two of you. Her sister is only 18months younger. :/

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MyRealNamesBernard · 16/07/2015 14:09

Thank you to everyone who replied! I have to admit to being a bit depressed that someone thought I looked older - but the thing that really pissed me off was that someone could be that rude! Surely only someone who was trying to wind me up would say something like that...? Although, I do like the idea that she's pedalling botox!

Shakey, your story gives me hope that this person was just deranged, as clearly the person who made that comment to you was insane! I would also like to endorse previous comments about your gift for dungaree-wearing - you look superb!

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LilyMayViolet · 16/07/2015 14:16

You look funky and great! I think you look youthful, did the rude cow!

Shakey the exact same thing happened to me last summer. A drunken guest asked me if I was my 32 year old cousin's mother! I'm 44! Everyone said he was just being a drunken twat (I really did look nice and youngish!) but it embarrassed and upset me too.

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LilyMayViolet · 16/07/2015 14:17

That was meant to say sod the rude cow!

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TheWitTank · 16/07/2015 14:41

Ouch! That was rude!
Was at a wedding once with MIL and the photographer asked if she was the brides grandmother - that was pretty horrific. MIL nearly combusted. If it doubt, don't say anything!

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somemothersdohavethem · 16/07/2015 15:42

Have you considered that the woman is a bit jealous of you and thinks that by saying things like this she'll make herself feel better. Either way she's catty and needs to be avoided....until you've come up with a fabulous retort to put her in her place. I'm a bit evil that way Smile

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Peacheykeen · 16/07/2015 18:22

My first thought was she's trying to sell you botox. I think women who mess with their face too much botox etc look older than the ones who age naturally a la Katie Price. I wouldn't worry about it OP she sounds like a bint I'm sure you look fine

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spottybottycream · 16/07/2015 19:14

peachykeen I'm pretty sure Katie price has regular Botox.

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Tizwailor · 16/07/2015 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Shakey1500 · 16/07/2015 19:42

Thanks Grin

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