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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think I shouldn't be asked to vacate my seat as a pregnant woman?

61 replies

LashesandLipstick · 09/07/2015 17:02

I'm 32 weeks with SPD and have had a shitty day consisting of several hours in hospital. In a busy pharmacy while waiting I sat on the seat next to someone's handbag.

Next thing I know, I'm being asked in a rude tone "can you move out this seat so that old lady can sit down?!" By an interfering twat the owner of the handbag. The elderly lady then huffed and said YES, THANK you when I got up. I also got glared at. I expected nosy sod to pick up her damn bag but she didn't, and I had to stand feeling like I was about to pass out.

AIBU to think being elderly doesn't automatically surpass pregnancy, and if you're going to have the audacity to ask someone to move you should at least move your own bags?

Sorry for the second angry thread of the day, pregnancy rage is getting to me

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 09/07/2015 18:33

Sorry but this is a non problem - or at least it would have been if you'd just popped the bags on the floor yourself, or asked the woman to do it.

Original poster
LashesandLipstick · 09/07/2015 18:36

accidental I was in hospital last night with suspected preeclampsia, found out today I have excess waters and a 90th centile baby and am at risk of premature labour, have to have extra blood tests when I'm needle phobic after a pregnancy of spotting, HG, SPD and severe anxiety attacks and now this. I've been in hospital hours this morning being poked and prodded and generally feel shite and terrified there is something wrong with my son, so forgive me if I wasn't exactly on top form, "luv".

OP posts:
EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 09/07/2015 18:37

YWBU because I can barely believe a person wou,d tell you to get up whilst their own bag was occupying a seat, and if it did happen, you're a wuss and I can't believe you did it.

RolyPolierThanThou · 09/07/2015 18:40

I was in a similar situation and was also too shocked to speak up. I think what happens is you're still processing an so behaviour switches to default mode .ie polite obedience.

In my case it was a packed commuter train. We'd already been chucked off it to join another due to the train diverting. Five timesI'd had to go and find a seat due to some announcement about the train splitting, being diverted or cancelled. It was the hottest day of the year (that one recently) and I found myself standing in a non-airconditioned carriage after a long day in London for work.

A man in an aisle seat with a bag by the window refused to let me sit there as he was saving it for his mate.

I wish I'd insisted but a woman nearby offered me her seat instead. I felt bad that the nice woman had to stand now and the selfish man did not.

Another time, 6m pregnant I was on the train with my double buggy, dc (age 2.5 and 1). I got on to the disabled/buggy/bike carriage but all places an seats were taken. So I had to park the buggy in the door area but tucked away a best I could. I have spd but also ached so sat on the floor. Big 6m pregnant belly, sitting on the floor. No one moves. Tbf, one of the seats was taken up by a woman with a walking aid so cl clearly in need.
Three stops later a couple with a buggy get on. Two stops after that, walking aid lady gets off vacating seat and buggy arreea. I start the process of getting off the floor (spd and belly permitting) to find newly arrived couple jump into the seats.

Gits. Fumed the rest of the way.

Original poster
LashesandLipstick · 09/07/2015 18:43

I was in a similar situation and was also too shocked to speak up. I think what happens is you're still processing

This is what happens! I'm sorry you also encountered such arses

OP posts:
Mamus · 09/07/2015 20:12

I was a horrible, angry, combative bitch whilst pregnant the last time and I would have stared at her and said "move your fucking bag". Mind you I stood in the middle of a road and yelled at the bus driver who had just run a red light, almost knocked me over and then shouted at me about it that he was a stupid fucking cunt Blush when I was six months pregnant, I think I was close to certifiable for much of that pregnancy.

Stitchintime1 · 09/07/2015 20:15

I hate people who put their bags on a seat. And then huff when you ask. You have my sympathies. Another thing I've noticed recently is men sitting with their arm along the top of the seat next to them. I'm not going to sit there but how can I ask them to move their arm. I'm sure it's deliberate.

Hissy · 09/07/2015 20:42

My love you have had a godawful time! I had spd and its utterly shit.

I feel for you.

Let this be a lesson. Never ever give up your seat again. You MUST sit down, and actually if anyone has the nerve to ask, just say, sorry, no.

Or No speaka de eenglish.... Smile

Hissy · 09/07/2015 20:43

And tell them hissy said so... Ok? Xx

muminhants1 · 10/07/2015 10:38

Why did you move? I'd have said, no I am pregnant in a VERY LOUD voice.

Why on earth didn't the elderly lady move the bag and sit down - or did she think it was yours?

IceBeing · 10/07/2015 10:43

I bet those bags had been there ALL day...in fact I bet they were part of a sociology experiment being perpetrated by the staff at the counter....

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