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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Would you let your 12 year old do this?

93 replies

Homepride1 · 02/07/2015 19:44

Dd 12th birthday is coming up and she would like to take 3 friends to a theme park for the day, I really don't want to be sat on my own all day waiting around for them as they would rather go off alone, so was thinking that I could drop then at the gate (pay see then in) then pick them up at the gate again later at a agreed time!

They would all have phones with them and friends are all 12 as dd is a summer baby

If you were friends parents would you be ok with me suggesting this?

OP posts:

Notso · 02/07/2015 20:50

I can't see an issue surely by 12 most children are getting themselves to school, meeting friends in town etc by themselves.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 02/07/2015 20:52

Not at 12 unless you were in the park with them, at 14 what you suggest would be fine.

Blu · 02/07/2015 20:56

Unless you wear a red and blue skin tight suit and can scale buildings just holding on with your fingertips you're not going to be much use as parent in the event of a ride breakdown.

Theme park staff are not the fairground staff of our day - they are trained to within an inch of their corporate lives and CRB checked.

A theme park is a leisure facility designed and run for young teens. Gated, checked, supervised and well staffed.

Goodness: I was setting off on 3 day cross country pony rides, staying at friends fields, and youth hostelling at 12 and 13.

I do agree the parents of the guest children need to be on board with it, that's what counts, but I worry about the lack of trust in our young people to step up and take responsibility once out form under the parental eye. They are probably twice as capable as you imagine. That's what DC scout leader used to say to me; the kids were all far more capable and responsible and able to do things and cope with things than us anxious parents believed, and she saw it when they were out and about.

SocialMediaAddict · 02/07/2015 21:00

Nope wouldn't do this and my DD wouldn't be comfortable.

Viviennemary · 02/07/2015 21:08

I'm just a worrier.

Hulababy · 02/07/2015 21:11

Alton Towers terms and conditions state that a child under 12 must be accompanied by a an adult aged 18 and over.

Thorpe Park says under 12s must be accompanied by someone over 16y.

Light Water Valley states under 16s should be accompanied by an adult.

So do check on what is actually allowed.

usualsuspect333 · 02/07/2015 21:13

I'm a a worrier but I would still be ok with this.

AT 12 mine were all making their own way to school, going swimming and into town etc with their friends.

Flowerfae · 02/07/2015 21:23

I think I'd go with them and wait at a cafe or some other agree'd place that is easy for them to get to if needed and get them to check with me every hour or so.

Leeds2 · 02/07/2015 21:35

I would be fine with my 12 year old going round a theme park unaccompanied. But if I was responsible for her friends, I would stay in the park myself. Not walk round with them, but just be on hand should they need it.

Pagwatch · 02/07/2015 21:36

It's funny usual but I'm the opposite.
Dd is allowed into town on her own, walks to school and is pretty independent. She's sensible - she has walked up to school to an event this evening.
A theme park bothers me.

Four 12 year olds in an exciting environment have a capacity to stupidity far greater than their component parts.

Original poster

Homepride1 · 02/07/2015 21:44

Thanks for replies I will have a think and def run it by the parents, I would never just drop them off there without their knowledge.

They are all sensible girls and all like the same types of rides etc so don't think that would be any issues, will take a look at the local area, I was thinking maybe I could go off and do a bit of shopping etc then just go back to car park, I would be perfectly happy sitting there with a book and phone for a few hours especially if the sun is out!

The recent accidents at theme parks do concern me and I would love to say dd is never ever going to one again, but know I can do that

OP posts:

usualsuspect333 · 02/07/2015 21:44

I'd probably drive them mad with my constant texting though

InexperiencedDisneyMum · 02/07/2015 21:46

No, I wouldn't let mine unless a parent was somewhere on site.

lljkk · 02/07/2015 21:54

Yes, provided they can manage phone calls, get along well enough not to fall out, & are all age 12 or whatever the park requires.

manicinsomniac · 02/07/2015 21:57

I'd probably be fine with it.

But, personally, I would stay within the theme park and let them go off, met you for lunch then go off again.

I run a school trip to Alton Towers every year for 7 -13 year olds. Years 7 and 8 are allowed to go off in groups of 3 or more with one phone and my number. Years 3-6 stay with us.

Topseyt · 02/07/2015 22:00

I'd stay on site in a café or somewhere like that. I would have a book or newspaper ti read, as I am not interested in the rides myself.

Other than reporting to me occasionally and for lunch they would have fairly free rein, with the rules being to obey park rules and staff and obviously to stay within the park.

Tessbrookes · 02/07/2015 22:02

My ds has just done a theme park trip as an end of school term trip (his birthday's not until August so still only 11.)
I hated every second of the time he was there as I do get anxiety, but he had a fantastic time.
I figured I couldn't not let him go due to my screw ups, and I'd just have to stay at home being a wreck until he came home.
I was worried about the fact it was billed as 'remotely supervised' - ie, they go round in little groups but with no adult present. They had to check in at dinnertime with teachers apparently.
He had an amazing time. If I were you I'd let her go but I'd stay on site so I'd be there if needed. Find a café and take a good book and phone to Mumsnet on
Make sure she has a mobile with your number in zipped up safely in her coat pocket so she has it if need be.

EastMidsMummy · 02/07/2015 22:03

Goodness: I was setting off on 3 day cross country pony rides, staying at friends fields, and youth hostelling at 12 and 13.

George? Anne? Is that you?

whois · 02/07/2015 22:08

I'd probably rather you went in, but sat in a nice sitting area with a book all day.

wheresthelight · 02/07/2015 22:10

I guess it depends on the child. My stepson will be 12 in 4 weeks and there is no way he is mature enough to be left unsupervised all day at a theme park.

However some of the kids I work with who are a similar age would definitely cope with it and have been getting the bus into our local town for a year or more with friends.

Have you spoken to the other parents to ascertain their thoughts on their daughters being unsupervised?

Blu · 02/07/2015 22:15

LOL EastMidsMummy

(and it was in the E Mids, and the Peak District )

Bannerstaying · 02/07/2015 22:18

No. I would want an adult to be around in the park especially if the child wasn't mine. Easier to be on hand than a long drive there if needed. Stuck in traffic etc easy tohappen. Wouldn't be happy with teachers leaving a class of youngsters in small groups and allowing all teachers to go off elsewhere.

Volvox · 02/07/2015 22:21

Yes and have done it. DS took a friend to Thorpe Park for his 12th birthday. We dropped them off and picked them up. I did worry, but it was fine.

merlehaggard · 02/07/2015 22:29

I have a very sensible 12 year old and still wouldn't be comfortable with it. I would happily stay on premises and not be with them but not to just drop and leave them.

Mushypeasandchipstogo · 02/07/2015 22:37

No I would not let my fairly sensible 13 year old boy in the theme park, even with his friends, without an adult on site. Past experience has shown me that you do get some weirdos and older kids who can pick on quieter younger ones.

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