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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to wonder why people are entitled when it comes to benefits and general life?

430 replies

toomuchentitlement · 30/06/2015 14:50

It is becoming increasingly obvious, from threads here and conversations with people IRL, that quite a lot of people are so entitled. Obviously, everyone is anxious about the budget coming out on the 8th and what the proposed cuts will be, and so most of the talk has been revolving around benefits and the Tories (the party and those who voted for them). It is beyond frustrating how much entitlement there is in this country!

Firstly, there are people who have lots of children and then complain that the government doesn’t give them enough to feed their children. Well – the government (i.e. the taxpayer) had no part in having these children so should you not be grateful for whatever amount they do give you? I firmly believe that when you have children, they are your responsibility. This is where people say ‘Should it only be the rich that have children?’. No , just those who can afford children – if you can only afford one then stop at one. If you cannot afford any , without ANY state help, then do not have any. If you choose to have more children than you can afford to have, then you accept that you and your children will suffer as a result of your selfish decision. Yes, I totally understand that sometimes you can have children that you can afford and then life changes course; these are not the circumstances that I’m talking about. I’m talking about people who are struggling with the children they have (or don’t have) and then decide to have more. Someone will talk about contraception failing – which is rare- and even then you have choices; abortion, adoption, keep your children and struggle.

Second key area I have noticed is about housing. So many people argue that they shouldn’t have to move house ( to find a job or to be in a cheaper area) because they have family around or they grew up in a certain area. Absolutely you don’t have to move – if you can afford to stay where you are without state help! If you are relying on the state to help you and complaining about lack of jobs, then you will have to move somewhere cheaper. Plenty of people move. Family will still be family wherever you are.

Finally (well there’s a lot more but I realised I’ve typed a lot) , is regarding work. There quite a few people who absolutely believe that we shouldn’t have to work more than part-time because its not family friendly. On some threads, I have noticed people make snide comments about ‘ what a shame they live to work and not work to live’ and insinuate that these are bad people. They will bitch about these people and tear down people in highly-paid jobs but then turn around and demand more from them (in tax). My point being ; if you do not approve of full time work or highly paid jobs, why then do you want to take so much from these people who earnt the money doing what you don’t approve of?

This was mainly to vent because it is getting ridiculous and I didn’t want to shout at my friends and family (the ones who also behave this way). Apologies for any typos in the very long post !

OP posts:
JazzerciseThis · 30/06/2015 15:30

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toomuchentitlement · 30/06/2015 15:32

noah X-posted

morage I disagree with the cuts to disabled people and their not the people my OP is talking about. Please read my last post

longtime Even if its because of housing, someone had to work to buy that house in the first place - so what if they want to leave it to their children? Besides that, is ti a case "If i can't have it, neither can I?"

OP posts:
wafflyversatile · 30/06/2015 15:32

The government can afford to help them. We can afford to help them, if that's what we choose to prioritise. It doesn't want to help them.

toomuchentitlement · 30/06/2015 15:32

"If i can't have it, neither can you?"* Sorry about that !

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 30/06/2015 15:33

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JazzerciseThis · 30/06/2015 15:33

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Fudgeface123 · 30/06/2015 15:33

I agree with the original OP

toomuchentitlement · 30/06/2015 15:35

waffly it would appear that is not the case.

But really, why should the state keep people who , if pushed, could keep themselves?

Yes i agree that there is a lot the government could do to help - such as dealing with house prices somehow. BUT, I don't agree that all these people can't help themselves either - I know someone who works 3 jobs to make ends meet. I've heard of people working more but I have personally not met them

OP posts:
ChuffinAda · 30/06/2015 15:36

I'm on PIP and have a degenerative but fluctuating disorder. I never claimed DLA but have had no problem with the pip system, if anything it's pretty transparent.

The ILF is being cut but can't people still apply for personal budgets from social care?

hellsandwich · 30/06/2015 15:37

You can't type someone to death? No? It seems you can have a bloody good try though. I'm certainly losing the will to live.

MrsDeVere · 30/06/2015 15:37

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toomuchentitlement · 30/06/2015 15:38

Mrsde I've already said my opinion regarding disabled people.

Never understand why people insist on bringing up disabled people on all benefit threads which clearly are not talking about disabled people - is it a mechanism to derail the thread and make someone feel bad?

OP posts:
ChuffinAda · 30/06/2015 15:38

For a start they're means tested but personal budgets are supposed to be more cost effective as well as being more person centred. Not sure about the reality though

ChuffinAda · 30/06/2015 15:39

It is usually a way to derail threads. Bring up disabled people and children and people feel they can't argue. It becomes highly emotionally charged and the thread implodes.

Backforthis · 30/06/2015 15:40

We need children. We need to avoid an ageing population. You need enough babies being born to ensure that they will be enough people paying taxes into the system to pay for the increasing number of pensioners in the future. It's essential for the economy.

Allowing landlords to claim tax relief on mortgage interest payments takes millions away from the Exchequer and pushes up property prices. Right to buy means affordable rental property is disappearing. It's very easy to say move to a cheaper area, but where are the teachers to supply London schools or the nurses to staff the care homes and hospitals going to live?

Off to have a cool drink.

shovetheholly · 30/06/2015 15:41

I believe that no-one truly 'owns' anything and that we should distribute everything in society as justly as possible, ensuring that no-one (globally) goes without the basic things that they need to survive with dignity. I believe that those of us who are well-off need to take the hit in living standards that this entails, in order to live in a society that is humane and kind. I believe that the pursuit of unrestrained growth in a world of finite resources is irresponsible, and that we are burdening our children with a horrendous future by postponing these decisions. I believe that we all need to live with a lot more consideration to our responsibilities to each other and to the planet around us, and that this means ceasing to live in a manner that legitimates the most awful, selfish behaviours. I believe that the people who are the most entitled are not the poor and the sick, but the wealthy who believe the insanely hubristic ficiton that they got where they are through hard work, and not through luck and the fortune to have good health and good chances. And please spare me the 'pulling yourself up by the boot straps' stories, because I can pretty much guarantee that my boot straps are longer than yours, and I still believe all the above.

ChuffinAda · 30/06/2015 15:42

Communist perchance holly?

morethanpotatoprints · 30/06/2015 15:43

People who work are losing benefit OP, not just the ones you seem to dislike.
Children will be living in poverty, but you keep hold of your ideal love if it makes you feel better.
People can't just get another job if they work pt, you would be lucky to find one that fit in and your employer would need to be happy to give you set hours to work at your second or third job.
Do you really want children to suffer, or are you beginning to see what you have done in voting tory.

ghostyslovesheep · 30/06/2015 15:44

I work, pay taxes AND get benefit - which side of the fence should I be on op? Hmm

WorktoLive · 30/06/2015 15:45

We need children. We need to avoid an ageing population. You need enough babies being born to ensure that they will be enough people paying taxes into the system to pay for the increasing number of pensioners in the future. It's essential for the economy.

And what happens when all those children get old? Class pyramid scheme, which for pensions, is now falling appart, accelerated by people living longer.

shovetheholly · 30/06/2015 15:46

I wouldn't self-describe as a communist, because I'm much more focused on protecting whole ecosystems and not just on economics/the human. I don't believe in the state as the answer either in a classic communist way (because I think networks of global capital now extend beyond it, and it is becoming defunct before our eyes - I do believe in some kind of global institutions to protect ourselves from our own stupidity, though, as well as stronger local networks). I should probably state (wearily, against popular stereotypes) that I don't believe in violence of any kind, including the violence that is inherent in the current system, and that we brush under the carpet because we don't want to admit that our current way of doing things is causing a slow holocaust.

So perhaps you are not that far off Smile.

Sandpipernest · 30/06/2015 15:46

*I do think we have got totally away from the idea of relying on family or friends in difficult times.

The state / gov/ tax payer/ high earners/ council/ SS/ NHS/ Education Dept / anyone other than you or anyone connected to you, should solve the problem.*

Totally. I have lost count of the times I have read certain posters say, " I save the Govt £47 trillion a year by looking after my own family."

motherofmonster · 30/06/2015 15:47

If only life were are black and white as some seem to believe it is.

It would also be highly interesting to see what percentage of people who are no longer entitled to child benefit payments due to being over the earnings threshold happily took it before the rules were changed.

With the attitude most of them have now im sure that nearly all got straight on the phone and refused to take it.

Someone who takes something even though it is not really needed, and makes no difference to the child's life, is in my book far worse than someone who claims to keep a roof over a childs head and food on the table.

morage · 30/06/2015 15:47

ChuffinAda - The cuts to the disabled include -

  • Independent Living Fund for severely disabled
  • PIP which has a higher criteria than DLA
  • Cuts to the services that support the most severely disabled. That includes having to pay for things that people used to get free.

It is the most severely disabled that are being affected.

JazzerciseThis · 30/06/2015 15:49

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