To ask whether you judge someone based on their occupation?

[lushilaoshi]

I am sometimes judged (I think) a bit harshly based on my occupation. It can be a bit of a conversation killer, sometimes.

So without revealing yet what I actually do, if I were to say (for instance) that I am a City lawyer, what assumptions would you make about me? Would you take an instant dislike? Versus if I were to tell you that I am, for example, a languages teacher?

I think I can predict some answers, but I am curious about what characteristics are attributed to certain occupations, and whether justified. And in particular, whether gender makes any difference to your judgement?

I tend to make assumptions about people from their job title. I think most people do.

Assumptions about levels of education (e.g. lawyers, doctors are probably academically intelligent and well educated because you need good exam results for those degrees).

Assumptions about personal attributes (e.g. people teaching small children are probably very patient).

Assumptions about the sort of things people like (e.g. librarians probably like reading).

Looking down on someone or thinking they must be deficient in some way, whether morally or educationally, to have that job is an entirely different issue I think. I try not to judge people negatively for their jobs. Assuming their occupation is legal.

But I am ashamed to admit that when DS1 was tiny, I met a social worker (also a newish mum there with a small baby) at a baby group. Being an inexperienced first time mum with a funny looking baby, I was nervous that she would look at my parenting and judge it as not being good enough, so avoided her. No good reason for this at all on my part. Just paranoia as a result of reading some of the more alarmist Daily Mail type stuff about social workers

I loved my dhs last job title in his former company : Cloud Architect.

I know it building cloud based network infrastructures, but it sounds so lofty and artistic and natural sci-ency. I picture somebody making cloud shapes all day!

I don't judge, you never know - one of the cleverest girls in my class at school got a scholarship to an ivy league university and had a really high-flying career but quit and is now a beautician. Another girl became a forensic lawyer but is now a gardener and lives on the smell of an oil rag. Another childhood friend who was unspeakably thick has her own business and is frequently called to mediate in trade union and other business disputes and has outshone loads of others. Someone else I know worked on Men Only but is actually quite a good writer.

I do however make judgements based on social class - ie saying toilet etc

""I don't judge people by what they do but I do feel genuinely sad if someone bright works as a cleaner or waitress""

Unless you know that, that person is unhappy, then that's very patronising.

I live in Liverpool, were its cheap to have a nice way of life (depending on what you want of course) and unemployment is high, so I and most people from "Up North" generally are less judgemental and make less assumptions than people from further South, I find.

I joke that we have the best educated unemployed in the world and also some of the most talented.

I've done every type of job, I had a great time Chalet cleaning for Pontins/Butlins, had fun working in many evening roles, having large amounts of time with my children was important to me. Then I became a SW, I told everyone I worked for the Council.

I've recently gone back to a Support role, my life is my own once again, I finish work and leave it there. I never envied the SWs I knew who barely saw their own young children or wider families. Earning more money isn't always worth it.

I very much work to live and not live to work. As do many people who chose not to do Further education and are having to earn a living as Waitresses, in Retail or as Cleaners.

Getting a BA doesn't mean that your any cleverer or know more than someone who doesn't have any qualifications. Some Degrees only teach you about your Subject matter and then you work long hours surrounded by people who have gone down the same route.

I've met some horrible people working in Social Care and some lovely Bankers, a job role won't tell you what sort of person someone is.

I go to a gym in a upper middle class professional area. Some of the women, Solicitors/Teachers don't bother speaking to me. Every now and again, when they are having conversation with the nicer women, I have cause to join in and it confuses them, because they know me as a Support Worker, yet I can lose them on some subjects.

I keeping my qualifications/experience to myself, it wheedles out the arseholes.

The most interesting women in there is one who worked in hospitality for Cunard and the Woman who ran rough pubs, they also seem the happiest.

I wouldn't say people Judge, but most people do make incorrect assumptions, about others, unless they've been taught or worked on not doing that.

I try not to judge but I think its normal to have a few pre-conceived ideas. I am the admin manager for a double glazing company so you can understand the comments I get. Depending on who is asking, I sometimes say a glass company because for some reason this doesn't get the same reaction!

I'm a groom. The assumption seems to be if you work with horses for a living you are thick with no career plan. Never mind the fact I have full responsibility and day to day care of horses that are worth more than some peoples houses! It is the same for a lot of manual jobs i think; lots of people do it but to do it well takes a huge amount of skill.

My brother is an airline pilot flying 747s. He gets massive respect and lots of people telling him what a fantastic job it is. It isn't. He lives in hotels and has nearly had a breakdown due to stress. He has lost himself completely in the job and now has no interests outside of it. He was diagnosed with Hashimoto disease 2 years ago (Affects the immune system) and very nearly lost his licence. If my DD wanted to follow in his footsteps I would do everything in my power to convince her not too!

I'm cabin crew quite aged now

About 20 years ago I bumped into an old acquaintance chatting about what we were up to and she said 'Ooo couldn't do that job....glorified waitress really....wouldn't be my thing'

About 5 years later I did some recruiting ....guess who was at my recruitment day?

I'm a spin doctor.

Would be very interested to hear people's assumptions please!!

Gin I would think what an amazing tune Two Princes was....loved it

GinUpGirl - I would quiz you . Intermittently throughout life people have told me I should be a spin doctor (I even once applied for a job in marketing and got an offer for communications instead) but I don't really know the ins and outs. I suspect it's my vocation manquée! No prejudice here!

My dad used to be a policeman and now works as a traffic warden so he gets judged all the time. I've never understood the hatred for either of his jobs because if people didn't commit crimes or park like wankers then he wouldn't be needed!

I once met a lovely girl socially - great fun she was, boozing and telling stories. Found out later she was a dentist.

I was like whaaa?

I suppose there's no reason to think dentists can't be great fun. I just hadn't really thought about it.

I must admit, I grew up vaguely thinking that law, accountancy etc were 'boring jobs' done by 'boring people'. Maybe the fact they wore sombre coloured office wear influenced my view.

But in adult life of course I've met loads of lawyers and accountants who are anything and everything but boring. And guess what, they're rich too.

Wish I'd known that when selecting career options back in the day :)

I try not to judge, but I do make assumptions.

And occasionally, yes, I have judged.

Most recently when a friend of a friend who had been a SAHM for about 8 years (fine) did a four week course and then announced that she was a Life Coach.

I was a bit , really? You have absolutely no previous expertise or qualification in anything remotely relevant, you did evening classes for four weeks and are now 'qualified' to tell people how to live their lives? And take money for your 'expertise'?

Yeah, I judged.

ginupgirl My Dad described himself as a PR consultant, my brother and I had a lightbulb moment in our teens when we realised he was one of those spin doctors everyone was going on about.

I'd assume you were:

Probably an ex journalist
a news junkie with a deep understanding of the workings of the media
Very aware of psychology/human nature
quick thinking and always on call
Very good at writing
quite cynical and black-humoured
Good at persuading people to publish/not to publish things, by weighing up instinctively how to threaten/reward them
Not massively well paid compared to the hours you put in

I'm an accountant, which turns most people off me

I don't think I'm dull but probably not the best person to judge :-)

At my careers talk I said i wanted to be an accountant, the advisor asked if my parents were making me say that and was very reluntant to hand over the leaflet. Sad to say, it's all I have wanted to be (apart from a radio broad caster/ panel show person/actress)

Oh and ginup I'd also think that you were ready willing and able to spin whatever way your employer/client wanted you to without to much regard for your own views.

I'm an accountant/bookkeeper, which tends to result in the glazed over look when I tell someone what I do.

When I used to work in the world of corporate accounting, I'd sometimes get a look of scorn, as I was working for 'big business'. However now I'm a self-employed accountant/bookkeeper, doing accounts/bookkeeping for small business and sole trader clients, I don't get the scorn any more!

Thanks everyone - how interesting!

I think many of the things assumed are true if you work in UK politics. I don't - I work for elites in the Middle East.

So..

Probably an ex journalist - Not true
a news junkie with a deep understanding of the workings of the media - true
Very aware of psychology/human nature - true
quick thinking and always on call- true
Very good at writing - true
quite cynical and black-humoured - true
Good at persuading people to publish/not to publish things, by weighing up instinctively how to threaten/reward them - true
Not massively well paid compared to the hours you put in - not true, thanks to oil money.

You were ready willing and able to spin whatever way your employer/client wanted you to without to much regard for your own views. Very true.

I would judge anyone whose occupation was in the realms of homeopath, feng sui consultant, psychic, faith healer, or any of that shit. I'd think they were either deluded fools or out and out crooks, and not the type of person who I'd want to be in the company of.

Vicars, priests, rabbis, and other religious bods aren't far above them in my estimations. They are certainly well below a traffic warden on the pecking order, as traffic wardens we couldn't do without.

horseygeorgie actually being an airline pilot is a fantastic job - I know, I've been doing it for over 20 years.

It depends which airline you work for, and whether long-haul, short-haul, what sort of routes you do, etc.
Yes, very stressful, and lots of antisocial hours, but extremely interesting and satisfying at the end of the day.
Admittedly the pay and other terms and conditions are being eroded by the likes of the 'low cost' carriers, and I don't know if I would encourage my children to do the job, as inevitably it will get more stressful in years to come as airspace becomes more crowded and European rules enable airlines to work their pilots even harder.

Does tend to get people talking though, and I guess I am 'judged' in a certain way by others.

(Also, I obviously know loads of other pilots and sorry but they are almost always really interesting people. Most have other major hobbies when not flying - such as studying for a degree, maybe - as they have time to persue other interests on stopovers, or on days off at home after long-haul trips).

Cheese Dp would agree don't think I'll ever get him to retire.

Not sure would encourage dd to follow in his footsteps for reasons you have mentioned.

Times these days are certainly different in the aviation world.

Ooh, TTWK, you've just reminded me about a woman I met at a party once.

She had been a GP - a proper one, trained in medical school and so on - and had quit that to pursue a career in alternative medicine. I don't remember what the proper name for it was, but from her description, it involved having an e-mail consultation with a client (definitely not face to face or telephone, she confirmed when I asked), and then she used a crystal, which she dangled over a piece of paper with a list of health conditions. The crystal indicated what was wrong with the client, and then the ex-GP e-mailed back the crystal's diagnosis.

Once it became clear that she was actually serious and not pulling my leg, my judgy pants were pulled so high they were nearly strangling me.

I don't judge, simply because you have no idea of the back story. People do though - when I'm travelling and don't want to engage with a strager next to me, when they get to the "what do you do?" part, I always say, "I'm a florist". Kills conversation stone dead every time.

DH's father, like Hugh Grant's father, once introduced DH and his two brothers by saying, "This is my son X, he's a minerals surveyor, this is my son Y, he's a chartered accountant and this is.... erm DH". . Hilarious on so many levels.

Article re reason for Vietnamese dominance in nail industry

www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-32544343

I'm a lawyer. People don't think I look like one. 2 dads at kindermusik nearly fell off their chairs when they found out (turned out both had law qualifications but had failed to get training contracts)

I knew a fantastic nurse who then became a ward sister and then something else good in nursing, but she gave it up to become a psychic therapist.

Again, I judged.