WIBU to keep my son off school for this?

[Fantoosh]

So I had a hairdresser appointment this morning for 9.30. I desperately needed a cut and colour before going on holiday next week.

Unfortunately my dd was sick at 7.30am...although she seemed fine afterwards. This meant I had to keep her off school.
Given that the chances of getting another appointment in time for the hols was zero, was I bu to call in a sicky for my eldest son (14) this morning to watch her while I kept the appointment I had? Fridays are a half day at school anyway here.

My hair is looking great now but I don't know if I did the right thing.
What would you have done?

[Fantoosh]

I can see that arethereany but I was trying to stick to the basic facts.

[PiperChapstick]

I can't believe the op is pictish! Interesting experiment and good chuckle all round!

[pressone]

I am astonished this is you Pictish - up to now I had thought you were logical and made well balanced decisions.

You have taught your children
It is OK to flout any rule you do not like
That authority/adults can be lied to if it suits your own ends
That the "man's job" is more important than anything else, whether it be education, caring responsibilities for a sick child, Mum's R&R (because I see no where that he has been asked to take a day off work to cater for this scenario)
That if you are doing OK at school (or work) then you can take a day off regardless of the teacher who will have to reteach the lessons to you and the other 30 kids in the class who will not have the teachers attention whilst she is reteaching you.
So many poor life lessons taught in this scenario, I would noit have done it and I think YABVVU.

[Fantoosh]

Alrighty then.

I have to shoot as I have a kiddy bday party to attend and as yet, no gift. I'll catch up with this one later.

[NickiFury]

That's one of the most pompous posts I have ever read on MN Pressone.

I'm so grateful I don't know some of these posters in RL.

[ghostyslovesheep]

I think she's shown it's okay for a man to stay home to care for a sick child ...

[NickiFury]

Indeed ghosty.

There's just so much ridiculous extrapolation in that statement regarding the mans job being more important.

He could be working away.
OP could be a lone parent.
He could have already left for work.

But no, let's just make up any old crap in order to stick the boot in.

[Lottiedoubtie]

No I don't think you've damaged your son for life but it is still something I wouldn't have done.

I agree with the poster who says that posting under your normal name would have had an effect upon responses- because they would have been given in a context of knowing that you are not generally a neglectful thoughtless parent.

The OP- with no such context, does give the impression that you are. It's not a great way to behave- it is not a great lesson to teach your son and if it was part of a wider pattern of crap parenting, then there would be something worth frothing about.

It seems that there is always going to be a hysterical band of posters on MN who delight in telling OPs they disagree with that they are doing irreparable damage and will probably turn their children into drug addled criminals. Perhaps being a 'known' regular does give you some protection from those posters- but either way they are best ignored!

[ilovesooty]

As Elderflower pointed out it's perfectly possible to disagree with the decision and with the message it conveys without the implication that the absent child will grow up as a "drug addled criminal"
I'd be grateful Lottie if you could point me towards even one post which said that.

[Lottiedoubtie]

I deliberately used hyperbole to make a point without being drawn into a bunfight with individual posters. I'm sorry if you disagree with my sentiment but I stand by it.

You will notice that I posted that I don't agree with the decision but that I don't think the OP has caused life long damage to her son?

[pressone]

Thanks for your opinion Nicki, this is AIBU so everyone is entitles to their opinion, including me.

We know OP isn't a lone parent because she already said she was going on holiday with her husband - but as you say don't let the facts get in the way of sticking the boot in.

To me AIBU is not solely about the OP but everyone else reading it will draw inferences from the responses of posters in order to decide what is reasonable in similar circumstances. Every background will be slightly different but in general this would be my opinion. I'm sorry if you find an explanation regarding why I think this as pompous but that is your emotion to deal with not mine.

[ilovesooty]

I did notice - fair enough.

I think most of the hyperbole comes from posters who suggest that naysayers are likely to imply that the children are destined for drug addled criminality. A bit like long running jokes about goats I suppose.

[elderflowerlemonade]

Honestly? It's a projection of my own feelings and the name changing doesn't bother me at all. I namechange loads.

But it's the implication that if you had posted as your username we'd have been inclined not to answer I don't like.

I'm not sure what that's supposed to imply - not being an arse () I genuinely don't. That those who disagreed with the decision are bullies, or cowards, or both? I don't 'know' you on here pitsch but I answered early on and don't think I even clocked your name! I only got involved later in the thread as it had gone from 'YABU' to 'YANBU and by the way those who said you WERE are anal parents obsessed with getting their DCs into RG universities.'

It feels a bit like you wanted to trick people so then you could say 'aha, you wouldn't have said that to pitsch!'

I would; I have!

[NickiFury]

It's not an "emotion" it's an opinion.

I didn't put the boot in at all, but I think you did. I thought your post was overwhelmingly pompous and exaggerated. Again my opinion, which as you say, we are all entitled to.

[BitOutOfPractice]

Elderflower what about the op being a "good sport" about the pages and pages of vitriol she received?

Yes wide was a good sport. I'm sure she doesn't need you to come running to defend her repeatedly.

And nobody used that long list of adjectives you used at all. Though I did call you rude for pointing out that you believed some posters' writing style to be poor because that's what it is. Rude. The fact that you said it to make a point that some MNers clearly aren't capable of educating their kids was even ruder

[elderflowerlemonade]

You misread that, but I'm not going to bother going into it as my meaning was plain - you have read into it what you wanted to read into it.

[BitOutOfPractice]

""Lastly in at least one case on here - and I am well aware it is a specific problem of dyslexia - the writing style is not fluid or accurate. In the context of a chat forum that doesn't matter a bit. In the context of applying for jobs, university and similar, it does. Half a day will make no difference to that of course but let's stop with the pretence that education is unimportant. If the parent cannot educate - and in at least one case on these boards it would be reasonable to assume she can't - then the teacher has to. But the child needs to be there in order for that to be done!"

Sorry elderflower but clearly I am one of the uneducated to which you refer because I am struggling to read that in any other way than:

"Some of you cannot write correctly. That doesn't matter here but it does in formal settings. Clearly education matters. And it seems to me that some posters on here would not be capable of home educating their kids so they have to send them to school."

Perhaps you could elucidate further for me if I have got that wrong

[BitOutOfPractice]

And just for the record - those people who you say were calling MNers uptaight and anal, were being called bad examples, shit mothers etc. So it went both ways.

[elderflowerlemonade]

As I have said, you read that in the way you wanted to read it, so you could get huffy

[YouTheCat]

I read it the same way as Bit. And I'm not huffy, just mildly amused.

[LashesandLipstick]

I also read it like that. I don't see how else it was meant

[MiscellaneousAssortment]

I'm afraid I also read it that way. The meaning may have been plain as you wrote it but it didn't come over as you attended, assuming you didn't mean to say the above.

[SoleSource]

Yanbu, it is nothing to worry about.

[BitOutOfPractice]

Not just me then. Clearly your writing isn't as fluid and accurate as you think elderflower

[Wideopenspace]

Namechanging is fair enough. Name changing then "coming out" just seems so...so... melodramatic

.