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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

BBQ at a wedding.....too tacky and cheap???

148 replies

Janeymoo50 · 24/06/2015 08:24

my wedding is booked for 3pm on a Sat afternoon. Tight budget (about 6K all in), roughly 45-50 guests for the whole day. Ceremony at 3pm, informal photos only, then a cream tea with cake, scone and cream, couple of small speeches. Guests will have a drink served straight after the ceremony and there'll be tea/coffee and more fizz with the tea. Then we're having a BBQ as the main food about 7pm. Not having wedding cake but hoping to do either a Krispy Kreme donut cake or some large pavlovas with fruit for pud. A couple of people have "made a face" when I mentioned BBQ???? Would any of you feel it was a bit tacky??

OP posts:

FeelingSmurfy · 28/06/2015 00:14

Bit late but just wanted to say that as a vegetarian I would just be overjoyed that you are bothering to cater for us veggies! It's actually rare that we can eat anything, even at parties thrown by close family who know we have been veggie for 26+ years!

Veggie kebabs sound good, best steering clear of pretend meats (quorn burgers etc) as its always a worry "what if they got them mixed up.." I'm sure a meat eater would probably notice the difference but I don't remember what meat tastes like and different veggie brands taste different but look similar to meat burgers/sausages when cooked

I would still eat a veggie burger and be grateful for you thinking of me, its just that the voice in the back of my head would be trying to put me off!

If people don't like your choice then they have their own choice - eat it or don't bother turning up!

mathanxiety · 28/06/2015 05:15

OMG I would love it. Your wedding plans sound lovely.

Best wedding I was ever at had a make your own sandwich buffet but BBQ would be brilliant.

I would serve green salads with French or Italian dressing instead of anything with mayonnaise or egg of any kind to avoid giving people funny tummies.

Make sure there are a gazillion napkins more than you think you'll need for the BBQ part.

Maybe get yourselves a little bluegrass band to play during the meal?

DaveMinion · 28/06/2015 06:05

We specifically chose our reception venue so we could have a bbq. We aren't the sit down meal kind of people and we loved it. So did our guests (might be something to do with the ice cream truck we had too lol). An awesome day and great memories for dh and I.

DaveMinion · 28/06/2015 06:05

Ps I got married at 3pm too. Good time for a wedding

nowttodowithme · 28/06/2015 08:00

I had a massive wedding with traditional sit down meal in the day.

In the evening I had the biggest paella you've ever seen and a BBQ. It was amazing and my guests loved it.

We had proper plates and cutlery and still had places for people to sit.

Congrats!

Mia1415 · 28/06/2015 08:04

I think it's a great idea. Just make sure you have enough food. I went to a bbc wedding a few years back at a hotel & they ran out of food! Enjoy your special day

xiaozhu · 28/06/2015 08:53

No way! My brother had BBQ at his wedding, it was great. Much better for a summer wedding than a stuffy sit down.

ClarissaTheTeenageBitch · 28/06/2015 09:08

I'm having a fish and chips van. Wonder what face they'd pull at that!

whatsagoodusername · 28/06/2015 09:15

We did a BBQ. Everyone appeared to enjoy it.

As long as there's enough seating at tables, then why not? Not much different from any buffet. Proper plates are better than paper ones though.

Gem124 · 28/06/2015 09:24

You've described our wedding!

GreenAugustLion · 28/06/2015 10:32

We had a BBQ as the main meal at our wedding. Ceremony was at 2 and BBQ at 5. BBQ was outside, so everyone went to get their meat then all the sides were served individually on each table.

Lots of people said it was the best wedding meal they'd had and much nicer than the typical chicken and veg dinner most have!

whois · 28/06/2015 10:45

Love the ice cream van idea!

flipyoumelonfarmer · 28/06/2015 10:50

I think it's your wedding and you should do what makes you happy and all that but... I think it's fair to say that most vegetarians/vegans find BBQs/hog roasts REALLY grim. It's the smell. Obviously if it's a big venue with lots of outside space then it's not really a problem as you just move away from the cooking, but in a smaller garden it can be awful. While I would never dream of complaining about any occasion when anyone's giving me free food, I would secretly be counting the minutes until it was over and plastering on a fake smile so as not to look disgusted.

I'm possibly a bit oversensitive to this stuff, because the last wedding I went to provided a main course for veggies but nothing else - no starter, not a single canape - which was a bit miserable.

FeelingSmurfy · 28/06/2015 13:22

I would serve salad plain and have dressings optional, not everyone likes dressing and this way everyone can enjoy

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 28/06/2015 16:01

Sounds lovely.

Enjoy your day and many congratulations xxxxx

mygrandchildrenrock · 28/06/2015 17:05

My DD had a BBQ at her wedding about 13 yrs ago. It was a catered one, and the last three guests got food poisoning from the chicken! They were my DH, my DS and our nanny! I'm assuming it was out in the sun too long or not cooked enough. It was a hot day in August. No-one else was ill, and I was so glad it was family members, although obviously I wished no-one had got ill!
Hopefully yours will be fine!

Marylou2 · 28/06/2015 17:06

Sounds amazing!! BBQ and Krispy Kremes...what's not to like.Have a fabulous time.

Flossyfloof · 28/06/2015 17:07

Perhaps the people who don't fancy a barbecue will not come. I a, more than happy with a late invite so please don't hesitate.
I went to a wedding last year in a community hall type place with a barbecue and it was lovely.

Flossyfloof · 28/06/2015 17:07

I am veggie by the way, it really didn't bother me.

SpamAnderson · 28/06/2015 17:08

It's your wedding, you do what you like! If you want to have a kids party style buffet, you have it, you want a barbecue, go ahead. I did a wedding cake last year for a couple who had theirs like a funfair, ice cream van, barbecue and donuts, it was awesome and so lovely and relaxed :)

ahbollocks · 28/06/2015 17:19

Thats the exact wedding I want :) hope you have a wonderful day

returnofthehumanegg · 28/06/2015 19:24

We had one of these and though we'd pictured people outside with picnic rugs it rained, but it was still great as the inside space was nice and it was great food! I'm saying that and I had the veggy meal. People don't go to weddings expecting the same choice as if picking their favourite restaurant surely, and if done well like yours is by the sound of it, it's possibly more popular food than a lot of more traditional stuff done en masse. Think our veg version was spicy sweet potato burger with halloumi or similar. The venue were very organised so don't know how it worked but there wasn't much waiting about for food.

Blondeshavemorefun · 28/06/2015 19:59

i think its a lovely idea

and those who tink it is tacky un invite

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