BBQ at a wedding.....too tacky and cheap???

[Janeymoo50]

my wedding is booked for 3pm on a Sat afternoon. Tight budget (about 6K all in), roughly 45-50 guests for the whole day. Ceremony at 3pm, informal photos only, then a cream tea with cake, scone and cream, couple of small speeches. Guests will have a drink served straight after the ceremony and there'll be tea/coffee and more fizz with the tea. Then we're having a BBQ as the main food about 7pm. Not having wedding cake but hoping to do either a Krispy Kreme donut cake or some large pavlovas with fruit for pud. A couple of people have "made a face" when I mentioned BBQ???? Would any of you feel it was a bit tacky??

I would love that. Invite me please! Ignore the naysayers, they are rude and miserable.

Yeah, that's my own issues tho.

I love food and eat pretty much anything BUT I'm very particular about certain things and I don't like to waste food, therefore I'd rather go without and claim I'm not hungry than pick up a sausage or burger and find it's either crap meat or not cooked properly then have to leave it. Or get to the front of the queue and find there is only chicken legs left as I can not eat meat off the bone.

Like I said - my own issues.

Therefore I generally keep them to myself so as to avoid offending other people and potentially in this case, ruin someone's wedding!

Nothing wrong with it at all as long is it's cooked nicely / properly. For that many people though maybe some large joints of meat bbq'd instead of sausage / burger type stuff. Often works out cheaper when you're catering for big numbers.

I've been to a couple of weddings where there has been a hog roast and a BBQ and they were amazingly good fun. Sadly I'm a vegetarian so I didn't get to same the delights but it smelt lovely and the rest of my family enjoyed it (carnivores).

My advice though remember to cater for vegetarians or those who aren't particulary keen on meat. Cold platter perhaps of some sandwiches, mini quiche, cheese rolls and salad as an alternative. Other than that whack a veggie burger on the Barbie

It's not tacky but as other people have said you really do need:
Enough tables and chairs
Proper plates and cutlery
Lots of bread and nice sides/salads
Enough food for everyone (or at least have it properly rationed) so the people at the back end up with nothing.

Do people really 'make a face' if they don't like something they've been invited to? .

I've been invited to some events that are just not the sort of thing I would enjoy but I either decline gracefully (with suitable 'white lie' if necessary) or just go and make the best of it.

Years ago I remember being invited to Wimbledon (I loathe tennis ), the person inviting me obviously assumed it would be a great treat so I just politely gave my regrets. I would have hated someone to waste that sort of money.

Although I do remember sitting through a Shakespeare performance at Stratford being bored witless but only accepted as I fancied the person who had invited me. .

We're having a BYOB BBQ for ours in a few weeks- I dread to think what people will think of us

I love a barbecue as long as it's well stocked and well manned and you're not waiting half an hour for a sausage.

Actually I attended a wedding last summer where there the couple held a barbecue the day after for anyone who wanted to attend. It was actually a lot more fun than the wedding day itself as everyone was chilled out and just up for a laugh.

I think it sounds brilliant, Janey - I've been to a wedding where the reception was a very informal BBQ, and it was great. It really suited the couple's style, and everyone had a great time!

Dh's and my reception was a buffet in the village hall by the church where we got married. People spilled outside onto the grass, and it was very informal - and perfect for us.

The people who pulled faces are very rude. They are entitled to their opinion, but NOT entitled to foist it on the bride and groom.

I'm wondering why people are pulling faces though and I THINK it's because as a nation, we generally don't like having to go up and get our food, we prefer table service

But most weddings have a buffet in the evening, as do many other "celebration" events. A BBQ is really not a lot different to a plate of hot meat on a buffet table.

Sounds lovely x small relaxed fun wedding - my idea of heaven x hate the ott dream wedding thing x
Have a lovely day x

My daughter had a BBQ, as the vegetarian option for the catered BBQ option at the venue were preferred by her Dh to be. They wouldnt allow them to mix and match that veggie choice with one of the more formal meal plans. It was the last week in June, an a Saturday afternoon, so BBQ seemed more appropriate in any case.

i would love to go to your wedding, it sounds like a lovely party. Suits the time of year, and your budget, and implies I can dress pretty casually. perfect! Send me the invite of anyone who turns their nose up!

We had a fancy BBQ and spent the saving on a free bar. Didn't hear any complaints. I set fairly formal tables with flowers and table cloths who I think kept it feeling quite weddingy. We really wanted a relaxed informal FUN day.

I wouldn't have sneered as I'm not so bloody rude but I'd be secretly disappointed and resign myself to having either nothing to eat at all or a plate of salad.

Almost every wedding I have ever been too suffered from having smallish servings and/or foods i skipped, or picked bits out of. It's just how things are with carered meals, no matter whether the theme is BBQ, fine french dining, ye traditional fayre, or whatever. And it is always compounded by your usual meal habits being flung aside to suit the schedule of the day.

When we go to weddings (or graduations, or other such) I always have stuff like protein bars in my bag or dh's pockets. I have no problem bringing a lucnh box with food DS will eat (carrots sticks, fruit, a small sandwich) and dipping into myself if need be. If we are driving, these days it is easy enough to google what options exist. The most efficient travel directions, which the directions sent with the invitation usually are, always seem to lead to the venue down the one way with nothing, leaving the impression there is no where to eat for miles. But if you look beforehand, often you find alternate routes that pass a good sized village, or a shopping center. Not always though!

BBQ sounds lovely, your wedding so do what you'd like.
Word of warning - make sure krispy kreme use fresh doughnuts. A friend of mine had one of their cakes and the doughnuts were made the day before. They were so dry! She had trays and trays of them to give away and no one wanted them!

I had a BBQ at my wedding, with loads of different types of salads and pastas. I got married on the hottest day of last year, and loads of my guests told me that they appreciated a light "have as much or as little as you want" kind of meal, rather than a set 3-course sit-down dinner. Was good for me too....as my dress fit me like a glove and I could barely sit down...so a big meal was a definite no-no for me!! Go for whatever you want! It's your day!! There's always going to be someone who moans about something! So don't try to please everyone because it's impossible, as long as you and your DH-to-be are happy, that's all that matters!! (just remember to avoid the ketchup if your'e wearing white!! )

Barbecues are shit for vegetarians ime, so definitely bear in mind.

You either get burgers that have touched meat, or those bloody awful kebabs consisting of shrivelled mushrooms that get pigged by the meat eaters anyway!

It sounds lovely OP

Go ahead with the BBQ, op, sounds brilliant!

I'd rather attend a wedding with a cream tea and barbecue than a stuffy sit down affair any day!

And congratulations!

My stbdil and son are doing just this and catering seperate for the veggies with beautiful alternatives followed by brownies, chocolate and ice cream.

Anyone who pulls a face gets it shoved in ( yes you my super dils mother) silly cow!!!

They are a super couple and we are bursting with pride.

Go ahead op and enjoy the day.

Can't belive the bloody cheek of some people. The only response to a wedding invite meal is 'that's lovely thank you do much'

Sounds lovely. It's your wedding, do what YOU want.

I had a bbq in the evening at my wedding. Went down very well.

I didn't actually eat any of it but id be very happy as a guest with bbq food especially after a few wines

I would specify on the invitations that dress is casual/semi casual. Eating barbecue outdoors while wearing a fancy outfit and high heels is not very enjoyable. Make sure there are lots of nice grilled veg like asparagus, etc, rather than just salad for the non-meat eaters. Sounds like a good party!

Love a BBQ! Hate stuffy sit down meals where you have to sit where you're told, eat what you're given and are forever waiting for the wine waiter - or is that just me