To ask teachers, come on- is this code?!

[Balacqua]

Ds age 5 is at the end of reception - he was described during our parent interview as being overly emotional, easily frustrated, difficulties with hand writing, socially immature, doesn't use his words and gets upset, ... Doesn't put his hand up on the carpet and argues with friends. Also told he is academic ally able, good reader, good at maths.

Is this code for problem child?

I think teacher has been very honest, and seems to understand your DS's strengths and weaknesses well.

In light of the family history, his easy frustration and poor handwriting could be a possible sign of asd/adhd/dyspraxia, or he could just be a late developer and will be fine. Is he young for the year? It looks like both you and the school are doing the right things so far.

Really thanks for all responses. lljjk I'm sorry to hear of your sons difficulties- do they get support what's going on for them?.no, so far it's not been like that except teachers are still talking about how
he's settled down so much better now .

extremelystubborn that's interesting. I hope your dd has the right support now? my dh has as traits and I worry sometimes that it's not the end of the world if ds has too, but it might make life harder for him so it makes me sad. He gets on better with younger kids and doesnt really get the complexity of what the more mature ones are doing, especially if it's unkind.
Thanks hag for your insight. Yes I totally agree and yes I do feel bad backing away from ebd - my brother had challenging behaviour because of deeper emotional issues due to life experiences and he had such a miserable time at school.

lokibear thats really good ti hear, thank you. I support and understanding is the key.
missmay yes in England and no not ready for formal learning I agree

Wow, Can't believe kids having trouble settling down at school are written off as a pita or "that child". I know it's all lighthearted but I do think kids pick up on these things and it just exacerbates a problem that could be solved with appropriate support.

As others have said a problem with the primary system in the UK is that we start too young. This hits the less mature kids harder as they're being asked to fit into a system they're not ready for. In all likelihood your son will catch up socially but you should be careful his confidence isn't knocked or he doesn't start to think of himself as "naughty" or unpopular. (Although obviously his behaviour should be managed in a positive way).

I totally thought this thread was going to be about you having a problem with the new ICT curriculum!

You need to make sure you have all the support he will need moving into year 1. Ask the teachers if they feel he will cope and what can be done to help the transition. Year 1 can be very tough, they do really up the pressure academically and there is a lot less time for soothing frustrated children. Many kids don't know what hit them the first term of year 1, it can be very different from the loving and almost nursery-like environment of reception.

Maybe try and so some fun activities over the summer that help with handwriting skills?

It might be worth having a word with the current teacher and see if she has suggestions - but main thing would be to see what next year teacher end up saying - they usually know they by first half term.

I had a horrible end of year report for my DS reception year - he wasn't doing well academically either. I was worried for similar reasons to you.

He was also being wound up by another child and before end of the day lashing out and teacher was telling us this but doing nothing to stop it- which meant last term we were being called up and talked to in front of other parents who then started excluding my DC.

He grew up over the summer, we did some support work at home, two form year group so was moved away from other child, more experienced teacher - none of his subsequent teachers have been anything less than positive.

Moving him to other class did mute some of the impact of parents excluding him - we threw a class party as well which parents and that and ones he attended they could see he is a well behaved polite boy. He's now quiet popular with other parents as well as his peers.

I wouldn't worry yet - the school seems supportive and your DS doing well academically I'd see how he matures next year.