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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

To think men have no right to stand outside abortion clinics and do this.

787 replies

QuestioningStuff · 22/06/2015 09:36

Posted before about my pregnancy. I am having a termination today. This is not a decision I've made lightly.

I've arrived at the clinic and there is a middle aged man and his young teen son standing outside with camp chairs and flasks. Putting up awful pictures and signs. Trying to hand out leaflets.

I think women who do this are also scum but how on earth could a man think he has any right to do this? Turn up at a place where women are at their most scared and vulnerable and try to bully them?

It's really really upset me. I hate them so much right now.

I want to go and tell them exactly what I think of them but don't think that would be helpful at this time.

OP posts:
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 22/06/2015 09:38

Of course they have a right to feel how they do, and the right to protest peacefully.

Flowers OP.

Stealthpolarbear · 22/06/2015 09:40

I know exactly what you mean. Part of the wider issue that men feel they have the right to control women's bodies.
Hope all goes well today x

Stealthpolarbear · 22/06/2015 09:40

Maybe you should hold up a banner suggesting they should have vasectomies. None of your business of course but don't let that stop you

CommanderShepard · 22/06/2015 09:41

Because living in a patriarchal society makes them think they have the right to dictate what women do with their own bodies.

I'm so sorry, OP. I'll be thinking of you today Flowers

twittertwit · 22/06/2015 09:41

YANBU OP, I have experienced the same thing and know exactly how you feel.

CommanderShepard · 22/06/2015 09:41

Cross-posted with stealth!

KidLorneRoll · 22/06/2015 09:44

I actually think there should be exclusion zones around such sensitive places.

You have to be a cunt of the highest order to even think about doing such a thing.

LikePirateEyeJavierDog · 22/06/2015 09:45

Any person whose mind they change, that is a human being's life they have saved. It is probably worth being considered scum for, and if they weren't abusive or horrible... well you can't blame people for trying.

I'm sorry for your sad and difficult time, OP, but I wouldn't consider them bad people for it.

They are not BU, and YANBU in your situation to feel bad about it.

paulapompom · 22/06/2015 09:46

Anyone can protest about anything, it dosent mean they have an understanding of the situation. Ignore them, You know you have made your decision after knowing all the facts and reasons for it. Wishing you wellFlowers

ohtheholidays · 22/06/2015 09:48

I agree with kid about the exclusion zones.

They're fucking idiots,women and girls have terminations for all sorts of reasons.I would never say it was an easy choice no matter what the circumstances.

What if some poor young girl or women is going there to have a termination because they've been raped.Could you imagine,I think they'd be bloody terrified having two men stood outside there starting.

TwoLeftSocks · 22/06/2015 09:50

I don't think anyone should be doing that, male or female, and would fully support exclusion zones.

Hope today goes okay for you Flowers

however · 22/06/2015 09:51

They have the right, unfortunately. They shouldn't, though.

The're on a par with the Westbro Baptist Church.

FoulsomeAndMaggotwise · 22/06/2015 09:52

Look after yourself Questioning, and no, I don't believe anyone has a right to do this. They don't have a fucking clue about the situations of the women they're protesting and neither do the posters here claiming its "their right" and that they have "saved a life".

Go educate yourselves.

Ignore them OP, you know what's best in your situation, no-one else.

Hiding the thread now so won't be back Flowers

SundayDinner · 22/06/2015 09:52

Yanbu. Hideous thing to do. Flowers. Of course they were being unreasonable, I cannot believe anyone would think otherwise.

twofingerstoGideon · 22/06/2015 09:53

Of course they have a right to feel how they do, and the right to protest peacefully.

No. They absolutely do not have the 'right' to get into the faces of women who are accessing a legal procedure. They have a right to their feelings, of course, and it would be fine for them to lobby their MPs, make their voices heard elsewhere. It is completely inappropriate for them to intimidate service users, which is absolutely their intention.

link to petition for exclusion zones

formerbabe · 22/06/2015 09:53

I completely agree op....men who oppose abortion make me so angry...protesting outside abortion clinics is a disgraceful way to behave. Why focus on the often vulberable women in that situation rather than the men who were also involved? Literally makes me sick that women have to deal with shit like this.

Hope you're OK op Flowers

honeyroar · 22/06/2015 09:54

The sex of a person protesting doesn't come into it. It's no difference if it's a man or a woman protesting.

twofingerstoGideon · 22/06/2015 09:54

Flowers OP. Clearly you have thought this through and the decision is yours and yours alone. Ignore the arseholes if you can.

WorraLiberty · 22/06/2015 09:55

No-one has a right to do this no matter what their gender.

Sorry for your experience OP Thanks

twofingerstoGideon · 22/06/2015 09:56

The sex of a person protesting doesn't come into it. It's no difference if it's a man or a woman protesting.

Except, of course, that a man will never, ever be faced with the decision to go through with a pregnancy they did not want.

WorraLiberty · 22/06/2015 09:56

Well actually they do have a right

But I don't believe they should stand outside clinics. I'm sure there are other ways to voice their opinions, is what I meant.

prorsum · 22/06/2015 09:59

Flowers No they should not, nor should anybody else. It's enraging and the government are doing nothing about it. BPAS are running a campaign atm try to get exclusion zones and it's getting nowhere.

LikePirateEyeJavierDog · 22/06/2015 10:00

Er... I'm not sure we ought to argue over the ethics of abortion in this thread, given the OP's situation.

Gileswithachainsaw · 22/06/2015 10:00

They have a right to their opinion. but that's as far as it goes.

no one should have the right to camp outside a clinic to attack vulnerable women/couples at such a hard time. It's disgusting.

i hope it goes ok for you Flowers

twofingerstoGideon · 22/06/2015 10:01

Probably because it only affects women, prorsum.
Protestors are routinely moved away from (for example) corporate headquarters, but women are fair game.