DP comparing our wedding with an ffing festival

[Marilynz]

DP is obsessed with a certain big festival. I 'like' it but I see it for what it is - a long weekend in a field with a few good bands playing. Nothing magical for me but I go because I know how much he loves it.

This year, the line up is shit and the ONLY think I was looking forward to has cancelled last minute. Noting that a few of DP's arse kissed glasto friends friends were complaining about it on facebook - and he was agreeing with them - I admitted I was disappointed and said he only thing I was looking forward to has cancelled. He had a right face on over it and this was two nights ago.

Obviously he's holding a grudge because he's just said that my comment is the same as him saying he wasn't looking forward to our honeymoon as the weather forecast is shit and that was the only thing he was looking forward to.

How the FUCK is that the same thing? I'm livid. I told him I found that a bit offensive that he compares a music festival to our wedding plans and he decided that he finds my conversation boring and would not discuss the topic further. Absolute knob.

I haven't clicked on your other threads so am only going by what you've posted on here. I still don't think that he's comparing the festival to your wedding. He's not even saying that the weather is the only thing that he's looking forward to about the honeymoon.

He just tried to tell you that the festival is very important to him and he's hurt that it isn't important to you.

Sounds like he's a bit obsessed with the festival and you're a bit sensitive about the wedding. Maybe you both need to chill out a bit, and both try to see the other's point of view a bit more.

Ok without advance searching you and going by what other posters have said I'm failing to see why you want to marry someone like this?

So why do you bother?

I actually think you're both overreacting?!?

FFS OP - you've started multiple threads on your relationship problems with this guy and you're still not listening! If you have to start this many threads before you're married and you still marry him then you're a mug.

But regardless, you're overreacting. It seems a throwaway comment by him that you're manifesting into something else because you know he's not right for you.

You will be unhappy in your marriage and you will want to leave within the year but feel tied. You will be miserable. Hou will feel unsupported and possibly you may think he would change when the ting goes on. He wontZ

Haven't read the other threads but this specific situation sounds like it's 50/50 to me.

He's daft to be so invested in a festival he takes a comment like that so personally and you're daft to really put that much importance on a comment clearly designed to wind you up in a tit for tat manner. It's a weak attempt at best tbh.

I'd rather like a wedding that was like a festival. Especially a medieval one.

But I digress here because it seems clear that the pair of you really don't have the basis for a long-term relationship here. Let alone a sustainable marriage.

Any chance dp takes shot loads of drugs at Glastonbury thereby making it far more fun than the average punter might consider it to be? Perhaps you just need to get on his level!

Why do you need to go Glastonbury with him? Stay home and do something you enjoy instead.

You're still not listening OP. you're never going to get him to behave the way you want him to.

OP you post threads about this man every so often about how Glastonbury is more important than anything and how he doesn't support you and yet you're still going to marry him! I'm really not are what else anyone can say, you aren't listening.

*sure

I think you're being waaay OTT. And FWIW, I've enjoyed previous Glastos far more than I enjoyed my own wedding. Much less stressful, far more fun. Anyway, that's by the by.

Someone once said to me, "when someone tells you who you are, listen to them."
Your DH is telling you loud and clear who he is, but you don't seem to be listening.

You are not going to change him. This is the man you are marrying. Why?

Ps/ Both the Foo Fighters and Florence would have been shite on the Pyramid.. get yourself off to see someone decent on the smaller stages!

Tbh I agree with you in sentiment. I have/had tickets to Foo Fighters tomorrow and am obviously upset it's off. I would be very disappointed to book tickets to Glasto and find they weren't there.

But.

You know what this means to him and you've basically said its crap apart from the Foos. Of course he's going to be upset. And I do think it's comparable to your honeymoon.

You have both overreacted though. You maybe more so if you're not exaggerating with your 'livid' comment.

wheres your honeymoon that the weather is going to be shit?

Your reaction to this comment seems over the top, but if he's more into Glastonbury than you, you'd be mad to marry him.

Why are you marrying someone who pisses you off this much?

I'm seriously starting to wonder why I bother
finally

I do look forward to your threads.

Oh, I remember you from last year. He loves Glastonbury and wants to marry it, not you. You're just more convenient in terms of being woman-shaped.

Marry him and you'll be complaining about this every year for the rest of your life. Just do us all a favour and tag your threads as 'GlastoWidow' so no one in the know wastes their time and effort dishing out well-meant advice next time, ok? Please?

Thanks ever so.

why are you marrying him?
sounds very much like you should finish with him.

YABU (totally) U. I take my DCs to Glastonbury every year and it is hugely important to us. Our chance to escape everyday life and spend 3 or 4 days bimbling around watching bands on tiny stages, trying crafts we had never tried before and people watching. It isn't about the headliners.

If I had said what your DH said, I would have meant that, just as the weather is not the most important thing for a good honeymoon, the pyramid stage headliner isn't the most important thing for a good Glastonbury. It wouldn't at all have been an attempt to compare the two.

Seriously, LTB. He's an arse. People keep telling you over and over. He's telling you who he is and he will only get worse after the wedding. Why are you sticking around?

I do think you're overreacting to that particular comment but I think YANBU because this is part of a bigger issue and you're reaching the end of your tether.