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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want to challenge the myths about OCD?

87 replies

LittleMissIntrovert · 17/06/2015 16:04

As someone who has been suffering with OCD for over 25 years, I would just like to speak up about some of the common misconceptions.

There are different kinds of OCD, it's not just having an imaculate clean house. Some people are hoarders, and some can have a mixture.

I am a hoarder, I struggle to throw things away. I have some piles of clutter in my house, but nowhere near as bad as TV programs would have you believe Grin but I also wash my hands a lot, and am paranoid about germs from raw meat etc.

It's with me every day, and it's very overwhelming. It takes over.

I find it frustrating when people say they are a bit OCD because they have to have all their pegs the same colour for example. I know they don't mean it badly but it really minimizes a serious condition.

If anyone has any questions, or wants to share their experiences, please do.

OP posts:
Sallystyle · 17/06/2015 16:45

My OCD results in:

Checking the gas is turned off. I didn't leave my straighteners on. I remembered to lock the doors and anxiety the house will blow up when I am gone.

Health anxiety.

Odd numbers. I hate odd numbers.

Reading- I love reading but it's a pain because I have to keep flicking back and re-reading things. I can't put a book down if I am on an odd numbered chapter.

I watch the clock a lot and if I turn the TV over and the time shows an odd minute number I have to keep turning it over until it is an even number.

If I touch something with one hand I have to touch it with the other hand.

I do a lot of things in four lots of four. Like touching my face.

Throat noises.

And 'pure O' at times.. just horrid intrusive thoughts.

I have met many people with OCD and their obsession and compulsions are very varied. People who are obsessed with getting glass in their eyes, people obsessed with killing someone if they sleep walk, people obsessed with food poisoning, harming others, sexual intrusive thoughts and many more which would take me hours to list.

Sallystyle · 17/06/2015 16:53

I also had teeth anxiety.

I spent a year many years ago convinced my teeth were falling out. I even slept with a mirror under my pillow so I could check them during the night.

I stopped eating incase my teeth fell out and I also stopped talking properly. I would mutter words with my lips closed and lived on milkshake through a straw.

This was in pregnancy which made my OCD 100x times worse. I was extremely ill then to the extent I couldn't function with it and was close to being hospitalised. Thankfully I was put on medication then and it kicked in quick enough for me to avoid being in hospital.

I haven't been that ill with it since thank god. I was also married to my ex then who wasn't at all supportive so that didn't help.

zarzlee71 · 17/06/2015 16:53

I have OCD, have since as long as I can remember. I do things in fives and multiples of fives (take sips from a drink, scrub washing up and so on) I also hate the thought of germs,I have taken the lid off my bin because I can't stand the thought of touching it to put rubish in and I hate raw meat, especially chicken, I get so paranoid that it will make me ill. I feel like I can feel the germs crawling on my hand......eww!!

Goshthatsspicy · 17/06/2015 16:53

Mine manifests as health anxiety, after l witnessed someone killed in front of me.
A cyclist and a lorry. :(
I was very sick with it for a few years. I moved to a different country to help heal myself. To a certain extent it worked. I think l will always remain fragile though. I feel very sorry for us all. It is very tough.

GobblersKnob · 17/06/2015 16:53

LashesandLipstick, have had meds years ago, have had mental health issues for the best part of twenty years. Unfortunately some of my HA centred around fear of drugs/overdose/side effects etc, so trying to take prescribed medication left me is a state of screaming hysterical fear, eventually realized I was going to have to work really hard in therapy Grin

ImSoCoolNow, yes they are, massively, but so are lots of other medical conditions, not that that makes it okay, I just try to be really tolerant when I can, I think most people don't do it to be cruel. I can say completely the wrong thing about somebodies medical condition through ignorance, it is difficult to be informed about everything that can go wrong with the human mind and body. Those who are genuinely taking the piss, or don't attempt to understand when presented with an explanation are, of course, wankers.

ninilegsintheair · 17/06/2015 17:00

I think I 'might' have OCD tendencies, I've actually booked a GP appointment tomorrow to talk about it but debating whether to cancel it as I'm worried they'll just laugh at me. Sad

Lifelong hoarding tendencies brought on by traumatic events in childhood. Recent relationship breakdown (ex was emotionally abusive) seems to have triggered some odd behaviour that I've only just noticed - like security fear (I have to check I've locked the doors/windows in the house multiple times before going to bed or leaving), fears about the effect of stress on my teeth, and prior to the breakup some suicidal thoughts although those have abated now. There's probably more I havn't noticed.

bluejeanswhiteshirt · 17/06/2015 17:00

*U2! I can relate to literally everything you said. I still drink with straws and I've been so anxious about my teeth lately I can't let my jaw relax and can't remember where it usually sits so it's causing a lot of discomfort. I've already had work done to my teeth (luckily nothing permanent or invasive) but now I'm looking to have it repaires because obviously this will solve all of my problems and let me lead a perfect life, finally.

LashesandLipstick · 17/06/2015 17:01

Gobblers that's a pain! HA is unpleasant. I originally meant my post to the lady above snd I got the names mixed up, sorry Blush glad therapy has worked for you.

bluejeanswhiteshirt · 17/06/2015 17:01

U2 *

bluejeanswhiteshirt · 17/06/2015 17:07

It's terrible that so many of us just on this forum alone are suffering with OCD but I can't help feeling relieved that I'm not alone in all this, if you know what I mean. I love Mumsnet. Shame my ex wasn't so understanding and made me feel even more guilty about it.

Sallystyle · 17/06/2015 17:07

Ahh blue I remember the jaw pain.

BTW 14 years later I still have all my own teeth :)

I was so bad I got banned from a dentist Blush I did keep going in saying my teeth were about to come out. Like I said, I was in a very bad place.

ImSoCoolNow · 17/06/2015 17:08

Oh totally. I think people say it through genuine ignorance and mean no harm but it makes me sad sometimes. I'm a registered Mental Health nurse and I hear even my own friends saying things like: 'I'm so bipolar' or 'I'm so OCD when it comes to that and I'm like: if you genuinely seen someone who was in an acute phase of their mental illness and see how tortured they are you wouldn't be so flippant about it.

FWIW after DD3 I suffered PND. It was more of an anxious depression and had a lot of OCD traits. It started off when visitors came I would get uptight about them sitting on the couch and messing up the cushions and it just got worse. I became obsessed with ironing clothes and took all the clothes out of drawers and stayed up every night ironing because I believed I was a bad mother if I didn't iron everything and that I would have let my daughters down. I also became obsessed with death and dying and had totally irrational fears about my own and my 3 daughters' health. It was totally debilitating and exhausting. Luckily I had a very good HV who recognised the symptoms got the doctor to come out and see me.

LittleMissIntrovert · 17/06/2015 17:28

It is sad isn't it blue but like you say, it's also nice to have people who understand.

I find when my anxiety gets worse, my OCD gets worse.

It used to be a lot more debilitating but I have found ways to manage certain compulsions.

It made a difference to me when I realized there is no cure, and although my mum and my OH think I could stop it if I tried harder, I know that although I can manage it, it won't just go away.

OP posts:
bluejeanswhiteshirt · 17/06/2015 17:29

What did the doc do ImSoCool ? I've been trying to avoid medication after trying sertraline which made me feel a million times worse but I can't see it ever getting better without.

Juliecloud · 17/06/2015 17:44

I'm so glad I read this thread. I've been diagnosed with pnd and I've been seeing a therapist for it but she thinks I have OCD. I have many of the symptoms described in this thread.

Has anyone had CBT for it? Did it help?

ImSoCoolNow · 17/06/2015 17:46

Prescribed fluoxetine (Prozac) 20mg initially and then eventually increased to 40mg. It definitely helped and eventually I came off meds. Really slowed down my thoughts and helped me to finally rest and, eventually, sleep. Also gave me a leaflet for local mental health services which were self-referral only but i decided not to go for this as I didn't want to attend anywhere I may have been in contact with my patients IYSWIM. My OCD was definitely due to PND though and I think if it had been chronic OCD and longer enduring then I would have had to go for a mixture of medication along with CBT. There's no shame in taking medication for a mental illness. If you were diagnosed as diabetic then you'd take insulin as prescribed. So why would it be any different for OCD? Some meds don't work for some folk so it's definitely a case of trial and error til you find something that works. Be honest with your doctor. Hope you can get the help you need. Good luck

LittleMissIntrovert · 17/06/2015 17:50

I have some citalopram but my anxiety is stopping me taking them, as I am worried about the side effects :( ridiculous that my anxiety is stopping me taking something that could help it!

I have tried CBT and although it was helpful, it wasn't the magic cure I hoped it would be. Still worth doing though, and I've just recently referred myself for more, starting next week.

OP posts:
SargeantAngua · 17/06/2015 17:55

I've only skimmed through this thread, and this is probably a daft thing to say but how many of you have had treatment for your ocd? I was diagnosed with severe ocd last summer - I can now see it had been bubbling away under the surface for a long time but I was under extra pressure and basically went into meltdown for a couple of weeks, before pulling back to a bad state but one where I could at least face getting out of bed again. Antidepressants helped a fair bit with the anxiety surrounding my ocd compulsions although didn't stop me washing my hands until they were raw etc. I'm coming to the end of a 3 month course if intensive CBT more though, which has helped massively, and if any of you haven't explored this I strongly suggest you do!

I'm not magically cured (history of anorexia and self harm, and looking into an Aspergers assessment - my brain is a rather murky place!), but it has made life more liveable. As I know from my anorexia, the longer you let these things take hold for, and become ingrained, the harder it is to escape.

ImSoCoolNow · 17/06/2015 17:56

Sorry bluejeans just re read your post and realised that you're avoiding meds due to the fact they made you feel worse. The thing with antidepressants is they can actually make you feel pretty shitty for the first couple of weeks. In fact, some people can feel worse for a while when they are taking them. It's best to give any medication 2-4 weeks before they are properly reviewed/changed. Hope that helps a bit

SargeantAngua · 17/06/2015 17:59

Sorry, cross posted with a few people re treatment. I'm on fluoxetine. I never want to stop it, although I'm physically chronically ill I'm in a better place mentally than I've been for years!

CBT hasn't cured me but it really has helped.

SargeantAngua · 17/06/2015 18:01

The fluoxetine did make !e feel worse initially - my doctor insisted on an urgent psychiatric referral so they could prescribe for me as she was worried about tipping me over the edge. I started on a half dose, up to 20 mg after a week. 40 mg was too much for me, I'm quite sensitive to it it appears, but 20 takes the edge off things nicely.

ImSoCoolNow · 17/06/2015 18:03

Sargeant I'm glad that you are feeling better mentally. I definitely all for CBT. A lot of mental health can be state of mind (not always) but changing your way of thinking and your perception of things definitely helps.

Ausflug · 17/06/2015 18:07

DH has OCD. It doesn't involve cleaning or putting things in order. It involves being so worried that he has forgotten to do something important, that he struggles to start any task, because then he'll be doing that, and might not manage to do that elusive, most important thing. We joke sometimes that he is like the sailor in the poem by AA Milne, but it is actually a really horrible and ifficult thing to struggle with, that constant nagging feeling that whatever you are trying to do is WRONG but you don't know what the right thing is.

The Old Sailor
by A.A. Milne

^There was once an old sailor my grandfather knew
Who had so many things which he wanted to do
That, whenever he thought it was time to begin,
He couldn't because of the state he was in.

He was shipwrecked, and lived on a island for weeks,
And he wanted a hat, and he wanted some breeks;
And he wanted some nets, or a line and some hooks
For the turtles and things which you read of in books.

And, thinking of this, he remembered a thing
Which he wanted (for water) and that was a spring;
And he thought that to talk to he'd look for, and keep
(If he found it) a goat, or some chickens and sheep.

Then, because of the weather, he wanted a hut
With a door (to come in by) which opened and shut
(With a jerk, which was useful if snakes were about),
And a very strong lock to keep savages out.

He began on the fish-hooks, and when he'd begun
He decided he couldn't because of the sun.
So he knew what he ought to begin with, and that
Was to find, or to make, a large sun-stopping hat.

He was making the hat with some leaves from a tree,
When he thought, "I'm as hot as a body can be,
And I've nothing to take for my terrible thirst;
So I'll look for a spring, and I'll look for it first."
Then he thought as he started, "Oh, dear and oh, dear!
I'll be lonely tomorrow with nobody here!"
So he made in his note-book a couple of notes:
"I must first find some chickens" and "No, I mean goats."

He had just seen a goat (which he knew by the shape)
When he thought, "But I must have boat for escape.
But a boat means a sail, which means needles and thread;
So I'd better sit down and make needles instead."

He began on a needle, but thought as he worked,
That, if this was an island where savages lurked,
Sitting safe in his hut he'd have nothing to fear,
Whereas now they might suddenly breathe in his ear!

So he thought of his hut ... and he thought of his boat,
And his hat and his breeks, and his chickens and goat,
And the hooks (for his food) and the spring (for his thirst) ...
But he never could think which he ought to do first.

And so in the end he did nothing at all,
But basked on the shingle wrapped up in a shawl.
And I think it was dreadful the way he behaved -
He did nothing but basking until he was saved!^

OriginalHugsy · 17/06/2015 18:19

My DP has ocd (under control at moment) but after researching it, it's called pure-o. He has obsessive thoughts, thoughts that terrify him like he might harm someone, that he might be a 'bad' person, that sort of thing. His compulsions are to constantly look for reassurance in his mind that he isn't bad or wouldn't harm a fly. Not sure if I explain it well. It's all in his mind, no actual physical manifestations. He does however tend to obsess over most things that cause stress to him, also has anxiety and depression but thankfully he has fought so hard to be in a better place these days with some counselling and a lot of self education. Knowledge is power I think in that sense, if you can understand it's a brain / chemical thing then it helps it not be so scary and give it fuel. We had a tough 5 years so it des frustrate when people belittle ocd. A socalled mate told me to tell him to get a grip and stop being silly once Hmm

ElleGrace · 17/06/2015 18:20

YANBU. I suffered terribly from OCD when I was a preteen, up until my late teens. I had irrational thoughts, and followed copious amounts of patterns that I had made up to deter bad things from happening. My habits consisted of things like flicking switches on and off and having to touch something a certain amount of times, but it was nothing to do with cleanliness or germs.

One day I spoke to my dad about my OCD (professionally diagnosed and also recognised by my mum who also suffers from OCD and has done so her entire life) and my grandma overheard. No one had told her about my OCD (we had only just found out at the time and I was 10) because of her tendency to dismiss mental illness and her total lack of knowledge on pretty much everything. She laughed in my face and said her friend had OCD and my bedroom was far too messy for me to suffer with it. My dad stayed silent and said nothing because as far as he's concerned, no one dare tell my Grandma she is mistaken. I still haven't forgiven either of them for that.

Misconceptions like that are why some people don't seek help for their mental illness, or even recognise it in the first place.

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