To think it's weird that my houseguest took all the guest-toiletries?

[SummerOfLadybirds]

We often have overnight guests so I keep a basket of spare toiletries in guest-room (in case they forget anything) and tell them to use whatever they need. Most people use a couple of things, some don't use anything, and I re-stock it between guests.
Recently my close friend stayed for 3 nights and when she left the basket was completely empty! AIBU to find this a bit cheeky and odd? Or did she think it was a basket of 'complimentary products' like hotels provide? I stocked the basket well (she's scatty and tends to forget things, so i expected a few products to be used but not for every item to vanish!)

Basket contained: new full-size pack of Olay cleansing wipes, mini bottle make-up remover, toothbrush, dental floss, lipsalve (all 3 in sealed packets), plastic comb, travel-size body-lotion, body-wipes, spray deodorant, some Clinique mini-products (free samples of make-up/creams that I collect and keep for guests) plus various sachets of moisturiser, BB creams, hair serum, facial scrub etc. Oh and a couple of individually-wrapped soaps, shower-caps and mini sewing-kits that I collected from hotels.

There is no way she could have used the whole lot in 3 days! If a friend provided a basket like this would you assume it was a gift for you to take home??

It was really embarrassing TooTypical. We left shortly afterwards. In the car on the way home I said to DH that perhaps I should get her something nice from Crabtree and Evelyn and he said: 'Are you mad? Fuck her.'

"We've never been invited back."

I don't think I'd want to go back

Did any heirloom fish knives feature in the meal limited ?! I need to know.

RhiWrites Those towels that are part satin with embroidery? They are for show, aren't they? And not very absorbent. After Soapgate I have been careful about what to use in other people's houses.

I confess I went to The Ritz and stole a couple of complimentary toothbrushes and a few of those toothfloss devices. They look like a tiny razor with floss where the blade would go. Oral B - so none of your cheap stuff. Drink had been taken and I was very impressed by the opulent surroundings and got a bit carried away, as a lawyer might say in mitigation.

I realise this is really skanky behaviour and years later they are still in one of the bathroom cabinets.

But I didn't take them all and will try to remember to leave them out for guests. Or perhaps donate them to a foodbank. They probably need personal hygiene items and I can cleanse my conscience.

ThinkIveBeenHacked

Controlling? For providing some toiletries? .

I always have a basket of supplies for guests because you never know when someones luggage might go astray, or someone might just forget to bring something, and you have to help them out. I also just think its a nice to do.

Would I be flabbergasted if someone took the contents of the basket? No, not really, and I certainly wouldn't say anything.

I wouldn't have phoned her either or mentioned it, I think that's ruder than taking them tbh

Really? What if it had been a spare hairdryer or a gold bracelet that had been left on a table?

I suppose, if something is just lying around, it would be fair game, no?

Everyone knows where polite boundaries lie. Taking a whole basket of toiletries from a friend's house lies well over even the most relaxed of friendships line.

Really? What if it had been a spare hairdryer or a gold bracelet that had been left on a table?

I would still say nothing. I would keep it in mind, but I still would say nothing.

Not that hairdryers or gold bracelets are relevant to the thread.

Were you mistaking another poster for me, LyingWitch? I don't recall mentioning matching toiletries.

So, no matter what a guest did to piss you off you would just suck it up and remain stoic?

And in context of my post, I thought they were a pretty good pair of examples. There are boundaries, everyone has a good idea of what they are. This guest overstepped them, surely.

I really don't understand the 'stay silent' responses. Yet again the 'aggressor' in a situation gets to walk away without anyone demurring, not even the tiniest squeak of protest.

Why are we talking about gold bracelets and hair driers ?

I'm referring to toiletries.

If anything else went missing I wouldn't mention anything unless I was prepared to lose the friendship as I'd be calling someone a thief.

I wouldn't have phoned her either or mentioned it, I think that's ruder than taking them tbh

If she wasn't a close friend I wouldn't have mentioned it. But as it happened it was a drunken accident (one we'll laugh about for years to come) so I'm glad it's all out in the open. Otherwise i'd be puzzling over why she did it and feeling resentful.

Hesterton yes I put snacks in guest room too, usually a little bowl of Lindor and some individually-wrapped biscuits, they usually all get eaten and of course i'd be fine with guests taking these home. I'd also have no problem with a guest using up all the toiletries if they genuinely needed them e.g. if they forgot wash-bag and were staying all week. They're there to be used after all.

Female guests often ask if they can take some the Clinique samples, I always say yes as it's a nice way for friends to discover new products (every time i buy my skincare products the Clinique lady adds a whole set of travel-size freebies and samples that I rarely use as my skin is quite reactive). But it's nice when people ask rather than just take them all home!

I just couldn't figure out why friend had taken the entire contents of basket including sewing-kits and shower-caps LOL

I am the matching toiletries poster. Less HB more OCD.

Dame, that would be me.... and my old fashioned idea of boundaries.

Never mind, OP is happy with her outcome. Everything else is immaterial.

There's more than one way to deal with things and as a result a person doesn't always have to say something.

As for being stoic - I prefer to think of it has having grace.

Love the Show Soap and your DH's response, limited

My house is not a hotel and I put full size new bottles/tubes/packets of shower gel, make-up remover, shampoo, toothpaste, cotton buds etc in guests' bathrooms. I think that if you put sample sizes guests might think they are gifts and take them.

"I'd be calling someone a thief."

But if they took a load of stuff, be it toiletries or whatever else, that is thieving.

Drunkenly tipping stuff into a bag is quite funny. But willingly taking lots of new things is theft. I have no problem with saying to someone "errm, all those toiletries, where did you put them?" If it's a couple of sample sizes fine, they're made to be taken. But big packets of new stuff? No. Why would someone take that? (Unless they were drunk, and a bit scatty).

Apatite I have a boxroom and an airbed. Somehow I don't think it's a minefield I'll ever have to enter. I'm now quite glad about this!

So yes, we have a little baskets of hotel toiletries, samples and value toothbrushes for people to avail themselves of. I think it's quite normal.

I also think it's quite normal. Not always in a 'here is a beautifully laid out basket' way but more of a tub in the cupboard with airline toothbrushes and mini lip balms and stuff like that.

It's a nice thing to do, especially if you have more than one bathroom so all your stuff isn't there to use.

Some people are born cheeky. I had a friend come over to my in laws to prep a party. She disappeared upstairs for ages then came back saying "I found these cool face masks and black head removals trips in the bathroom, so I had a pamper session." She had been through all my mother in laws fancy lotions and make up- without asking!!! I was shocked anyone would think that was ok.