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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Outside wees

42 replies

Meemoll · 12/06/2015 14:43

We were walking home the other day through a churchyard near our house, and my son (6) was suddenly desperate for a wee. We decided to try and do a quick outside one as there was no one around, but then a family came round the corner, my son was mortified and finished up quickly, but the mum gave me such an evil look and didn't return my greeting at all. Have we committed some massive social no-no? It was a one off and was a real emergency or else we'd have tried to get home.

OP posts:
Gruntfuttock · 12/06/2015 14:45

In a churchyard? I hope he wasn't peeing on a grave. I could understand you getting disapproving looks if that happened.

CatthiefKeith · 12/06/2015 14:46

He didn't wee up a grave or anything I assume?

Churchyard seems a bit disrespectful, but I can't really put my finger on why..

Hassled · 12/06/2015 14:49

Depends what he was weeing on. Shrubbery/plants/soil/trees etc I'd have no issue with - wee on pavements (and probably graves) makes me shudder. Illogical, I realise.

sarahsnail · 12/06/2015 14:50

If he had to go he had to go, I'm pretty sure all parents have been in this situation. Like others said as long as it was away from the graves and up the hedge then I see no harm, I've seen people letting their dogs do worse lol

AuntieStella · 12/06/2015 14:52

Well, anyone can get caught short. But unless very rural, a churchyard is a bit off.

You said it was near your house - could he really not have hung on?

Original poster
Meemoll · 12/06/2015 14:55

It was against a bush at the side of the yard away from the graves. we won't do it again, I see that we have mis-judged it slightly.

OP posts:
Happyringo · 12/06/2015 14:55

Is this becoming an epidemic or something, there have been what feels like tons of threads about this lately!

TeenAndTween · 12/06/2015 14:56

Normally, no problem.
In a churchyard? Inappropriate.

hiddenhome · 12/06/2015 14:56

Her great aunt Maud was probably laid to rest there 80 years ago and she was just being suitably shocked.

T'wouldn't bother me. It's only a quick pee.

DoughDoe · 12/06/2015 14:58

Church graveyard is consecrated land, of course it is inappropriate.

hiddenhome · 12/06/2015 15:00

Foxes and squirrels will pee in graveyards. It's a natural outside environment.

SewingBox · 12/06/2015 15:05

6yo is probably on the edge of it being OK. A tiny child would be fine, if discreet and away from the graves IMO.

JinglyJanglyJungleBigGameTours · 12/06/2015 15:06

Well yes hiddenhome it's probably unreasonable to expect foxes and squirrels to use public toilets or at least avoid peeing in the grounds of a place of worship.

I can see why the other woman might have thought it was a bit off and if your DS could have managed to hold on till you were outside it would have been better, but you did your best to avoid the graves so I wouldn't worry about it OP.

hiddenhome · 12/06/2015 15:10

People are too easily offended these days. People look for things to be offended about.

ScorpioMermaid · 12/06/2015 15:10

Wouldn't bother me either. It's not like he was peeing on someone's grave.

hiddenhome · 12/06/2015 15:11

Stealing stuff off a grave is worse. Or spray painting the headstone.

grumpysquash · 12/06/2015 15:11

I took our Beaver colony on a church trip and one of the girls (age 7) needed a wee. Think rural church, big graveyard. The vicar suggested she go 'behind the big gravestone' [so the boys couldn't see her]. So she did. I guess it can't be so bad!

Radiatorvalves · 12/06/2015 15:12

I remember taking a potty training DS to see his granny's grave. I was trying not to be too emotional about it... All he wanted was a wee. Fortunately no one was around. If granny was watching from up above, he would not have been bothered. He's now a bit older....and would have had to wait!

Radiatorvalves · 12/06/2015 15:13

She*

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen · 12/06/2015 15:13

I can't get worked up by a child having an emergency wee when dogs shit and piss everywhere on a daily basis.

Gileswithachainsaw · 12/06/2015 15:15

I don't think. A church yard is appropriate tbh.

mmollytoots · 12/06/2015 15:15

was it beside a bus stop. there was a thread the other day about a girl seeing a child pee outside

tbtc · 12/06/2015 15:20

In general I think graveyards are a place to be respectful and well-bahaved. We cut through one on our way to school and if DS (6) is cycling I always make him walk as a sign of respect. I want him to know that graveyards are not play areas, so that when he's old enough to play out w/o adult supervision he won't think it's OK to muck about there.

I would try my absolute best to find an alternative place to wee in, but it's not the end of the world.

I would be rather upset if I saw people allowing their kids to pee in the woodland burial sites where my parents are.

Cornettoninja · 12/06/2015 15:23

If you've got to go, you've got to go.

Forget about it. As long as it's not a regular habit your teaching that woman's dirty look was sadly wasted. You've learnt nothing Grin

DoughDoe · 12/06/2015 15:40

"If you've got to go, you've got to go."

What, you can't walk 50 yards to get out of the churchyard?

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